Prologue

That's the one. The one with the small headstone. Our Beloved Alice, it say Yeah, right. I was left all alone. I'm just lying there waiting for something to happen. Anything.

It would be dark down there, and it probably smells. Of course, this wouldn't bother me anymore, but still. I'm not me anymore. My body is decomposing at this very instant, rotting away; bugs are probably crawling all over me; all inside me. I'd shudder, but the thought really doesn't bother me as much as it should. Instead, I am standing here reading the headstone over and over again. Rain. Shine. Whatever. I'm here. I have nowhere else to go. I'm dead. My life is over. Woe is me. Blah, blah, blah. 

"You're so dramatic," Finn mumbles as he opens one of his eyes.

I roll my eyes and ignore him.

I hope I never get used to this because that would mean I accept it. I can't accept being a Wanderer, a ghost that is trapped on Earth and cannot move on. I won't accept it.

"You're already accepting the state you're in, Alice" Finn says with a yawn as he stretches. "You're a girl that hangs around a cemetery kicking at headstones. We need to leave this place."

I scowl at him. "I have notaccepted it, I'm just brooding."

Finn tilts his head to the side as he regards me. "Then why have we been sitting around here for three months?"

I stare at Finn. I hadn't realized that much time had passed. It's been three months. Three months?"Damn it!" I shout and kick at my headstone. "This sucks."

"You shouldn't do that, Jane. It's not polite to kick someone's headstone."

I kneel down as I roll my eyes again and scratch his head, making him purr. "Why do you have to nag me? And why are you so cute?"

Finn moves away from me. "I am not cute; I am a warrior," he replies with a low yowling growl, "but I am stuck acting as your familiar for the time being. This is the only form I am allowed to take while I am your guide, and you know that."

I sigh and look into his lime green eyes. Cat eyes. "You're a black cat, Finn; face it your warrior days are over. They've given up on both of us and that is why we are here," I reply as I watch his tail move side to side.

"They have not given up on us. They have merely left us to our own devices, that is completely different," he retorts and then jumps onto my gravestone. "We need to look for the boy; that's what they told us. I'd like to be back in my true form, and I am sure you would like to get your life back."

I consider his words; do I want my life back?

"Of course you do!" Finn replies with a deep growl.

"Stop reading my thoughts," I snap as I start to walk away. "It's invasive and rude."

Finn lets out a heavy sigh as he comes up beside me. "You know this partnership would be easier if you would just talk to me rather than carry on with your internal monologue; then I wouldn't have to skim your thoughts to figure out what's going on with you. But I do have to admit I like how you ramble on from time to time."

I keep walking, annoyed because he's right and because I'm not sure what I need to do to change any of this. Finn leaps in front of me, making me stop.

"Listen to me, Alice, we've spent too long in this graveyard, time will just start to slip by quicker; we need to move on otherwise you'll get stuck here. We will be stuck here." He rubs against my leg before hopping onto a gravestone. "You're starting to forget yourself too, and it will only get worse the longer you stay."

"I am not forgetting who I am," I mumble to myself. "And I can't help but hang out at my grave," I say louder as I turn back and look at my gravestone a few rows behind us. "It keeps drawing me back. And I'm brooding over the fact that I'm dead. It's what ghost do right?"

"No, they do not, they move on. You are a wandererbecause you cannot move on, and you cannot move on because you are not dead."

I look down at him. "I'm not?" I ask confused.

"No, Alice, you are not; see, like I said you are forgetting yourself." Finn lets out a frustrated breath as I stare at him. "Try to remember who you were, Alice, then you can remember what happened."

I pause and sit on a gravestone, and try to remember.

My name is Alice and I'm twenty yrs. old. My parents were…are Mora and David. I did well in school. I wasn't popular but not lost in the crowd either. I was an inbetweener; just visible enough to be missed, but not always immediately. I had several close friends. And I had been seeing…

Life was good for the most part...until it wasn't, and then...

I look down at Finn again. "Isn't it easier to just forget?"

He jumps into my lap. "You can't forget because there is too much at stake. And as you forget I forget as well. You have to remember for both of our sakes. Now think,Think back to when this may have all started."

I take a deep breath as I try to remember my life before I died...or at least before it got to this state of non-existence. Finn curls up in my lap and I scratch behind his ears and under his chin; he purrs and I try to focus on my memories.