5: fool?

Hei screamed, screamed until his throat was hoarse. That red light might be his salvation, yet currently it was his torturer. It was the cause of his pain, yet this pain could never be on the level Yuan Ming had caused him.

Hei wanted to hate him, he really wished that he was able to hate Yuan Ming. Even when he could remember the prick from every instance of reluctance Yuan had shown him, every instance of Yuan choosing humanity over him. Yet everytime he wanted to hate, wanted to forget those memories, the smile Yuan had shown him when they first met would appear in his mind and all the hate would disperse to instead be replaced by a warm fuzzy feeling.

Is this what love was like? Is this how torturous it was? Even more so than having to be concious while your skin and bones slowly evaporated and rebuilt themselves. Just when Hei thought he would finally loose consciousness and be freed from this suffering, the pain was gone.

The pain was gone and instead replaced by intense comfort. Comfort that he hadn't felt since he and Yuan were journeying together in the mortal realm...

Hei instinctively felt that some shackles within his body were broken. Hei felt that if he wanted to, he could leave this dreaded place. No, it was more like he owned this dreaded place now. He could bring anyone he wanted here. It was safe, it was something that belonged to him. It couldn't be taken away from him or leave him.

It amazed Hei that something so simple gave him such a strong sense of comfort. Had his life just been lacking until now? How even was his life, sure he was the devil king, but that was just something obtained by chance. Hei's life... it's always revolved around Yuan.

"Yuan..." Hei's voice sounded hoarse and unbearable. It was as if thousands of ants were all biting away at tree bark, it was unpleasant at best. "I can go see you again."

Yuan, even after all of this, Hei's only thought was Yuan. Yuan, his Yuan. Would Yuan accept him now? He was strong, much stronger than anyone. He could protect him, even if Yuan would hate him, Hei still wanted to keep Yuan Ming by his side. Even if it was just to see Yuan Ming's smile and hear his voice.

Hei Kong had truly gone insane. Yuan Ming had tried to kill him yet he couldn't feel the slightest hate for that man.

==================

He was tired. He was so tired. Hei felt so sick, so sick of this world and Yuan Ming. How many bitter years had Hei gone through for him? How many times had Yuan Ming discarded him. Hei was so sick of it all. Was the world enacting a cruel joke one him?

The moment Hei returns, he finds his people oppressed and driven back and exiled to the cold north where it was survival of the fittest, then the humans where celebrating it, then Hei finds out that he has apparently been dead for five hundred years now, then again, Hei finds out that Yuan Ming was going to be wed.

Yuan Ming was getting married. Married and not to him. Married in such a grand and flashy way Yuan had once told Hei that he hated. Was everything that had come out of Yuan Ming's mouth been a lie? Had Hei just been foolishly following someone who had never been truly honest with him?

Hei Kong was tired. His heart felt so tired, He didn't think he could take much more of this.

Hei Kong needed answers even more then before. Did Yuan Ming ever truly even care for him? Hei needed to see Yuan face to face.

Yet when he did, he hadn't known what to say or do. All Hei did was quietly follow behind the wedding processional. Hei watched and dreaded every step that took Yuan closer to that altar. Hei waited and waited until he finally couldn't anymore, he reached out to kill the nearest person to him yet once again someone beat him to it. Hei was too slow, so he simply killed the man who murdered his original target.

The bride seemed to scream, scream for Yuan Ming to kill him. Hei Kong waited and watched as Yuan Ming stepped closer to him, step by step, tears running down his face as he did so. Would Yuan really kill him?

Hei Kong was expecting it, maybe, just maybe, if Yuan tried so a second time, Hei could hate him.

"Who are you?" Yuan Ming asked Hei.

Who was Hei Kong? Hei Kong did not seem to know. He wanted to scream at Yuan Ming, question him, ask him why, yet all that came out was: "Yuan Ming, did you miss me? I brought you a gift for your big day."

And a smile. A smile Hei Kong hadn't used for five hundred years. A bright smile that always seemed to make Yuan Ming feel better.

Had Yuan Ming misssed him at all during this time? Hei Kong knew he would always be weak to this man. A simple apology, or even just a fake: I love you, would send Hei Kong crawling back to the man that had discarded him so many times. Even if Yuan just answered a yes to the simple: did you miss me? Hei would forgive Yuan.

Hei Kong wanted to hate Yuan Ming so badly, yet even when all this has happened, Hei could only ridicule himself. Yuan Ming reached out for him for the third time in Hei's life. This time however, Hei wouldn't accept Yuan Ming. Just like when the spacial crack opened, Hei Kong was too scared to open his heart completely to Yuan Ming again. Not without Yuan Ming learning his lesson.

"Did you even regret it?" Yeah, Hei wanted Yuan to regret what he did. Even if Yuan Ming only felt the slightest remorse for pushing Hei Kong off the edge of despair, it would be enough. Enough for Hei Kong to go through everything all over again.

Hei Kong felt that he was a fool.