Christmas special

I'm just saying this in advance, but this doesn't mean I'll resume releasing chapters now. I just thought it'd be appropriate to release something for Christmas. That's all.

And without further ado, enjoy.

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25th of December

It was early in the morning, and Shin had woke up so he could enjoy the festive atmosphere in full. He tidied up his bed, went to the bathroom to brush his teeth and wash his face, and proceeded to go to the kitchen to cook some breakfast for himself.

'Curry for breakfast... I'm taking that old man's habits...'

The food had a mouth-watering smell, though it still couldn't compare to Sojiro's cooking. The man had spent years perfecting his technique, so it was to be expected.

Shin took a spoonful of curry and brought it to his mouth, idly chewing on it as his thoughts wandered to the time when Sojiro cooked something for him for the first time.

'That was all the way back in April... And the old man kept cooking for me every morning, saying it was thanks for what happened in August.'

The sudden knocking on the door brought Shin out of his nostalgia. The fact that someone knocked on the door, even if there was a sign that read clearly 'Closed for holidays', could mean one thing.

Shin set aside his spoon and went to open the door, expecting to see a group of his friends standing outside, most likely to wish him a merry Christmas and steal his curry.

Instead, he found himself standing face-to-face with Shiho. Or rather, chest-to-face, as the girl's head could barely reach Shin's neck.

"Well hello, Shiho. Merry Christmas!" said Shin.

The girl nodded and lifted her arms to point a small box covered in wrapping paper.

"Merry Christmas!"

Taking the present from Shiho's hands, Shin briefly touched her skin, which was very cold.

"Hey... How long have you been standing outside? Your hands are freezing. Come in." said Shin, not really giving the girl any chance to reply before he pulled her inside, and closed the door behind her.

"You don't need to worry. It's just that I had to walk all the way here, since the subways are closed."

"Oh, right. Well, then, let me make you a coffee to keep you warm on your way home." said Shin, quickly tying an apron around himself.

One might ask, why wear an apron when making coffee? To which Shin would reply, safety in the kitchen is no joking matter. The apron could protect the chest, legs, and most importantly, the genitals, from most burns.

Definitely not because it makes him look more professional or 'cool' as Futaba would put it.

And from the looks of it, someone was definitely focused on him.

Once he was done, he put the steamy cup in front of Shiho and savored the look of enjoyment on her face when she took a whiff of the coffee.

As she was now appreciating his drink, Shin took it upon himself to make her more comfortable, starting with taking off her scarf and the like.

"Hm? I can take these off on my own, you know." said the girl, as she noticed very quickly what Shin was doing.

"Shh. I enjoy unwrapping my presents myself." Shin said.

The girl turned her face away, blushing, as she could understand what the boy meant.

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One Piece Parody

At the very beginning of the New World, the second half of the Grand Line, the captain of a group of pirates, Shin D. Eiru, suddenly resurfaced from the depths of the sea, the soap-like bubble he was covered in popping at the contact with the air.

The teen's body seemed to go limp, now that he was almost entirely covered in water. Thankfully, an inflatable ring held him above any danger of drowning.

A few seconds later, a large ship, similarly coated in a soapy substance, emerged from the sea. From the looks of it, the ship seemed to be a frigate, with one main mast and two secondary ones.

Something very eye-catching about the ship was the fact that it was almost entirely black with red accents, save for the flags atop the masts, which were all white. The flags had a drawing of a black skull wearing a black top hat. The left eye socket was lit aflame, and the fire was a very vivid shade of blue. The other eye socket had a small red dot, barely noticeable and certainly very eerie.

Behind the skull, unlike the typical crossed bones that jolly rogers tend to have, were 4 concentric circles. Red, black, red and black again, going from the innermost to the edges of the flag.

Right in the crow's nest, a black cat-like being was frantically searching for something, until it spotted Shin. It essentially took a dive from up there and landed near Shin.

"What were you thinking, you idiot?! Doing that when you have a Devil Fruit, do you want to die?!" said the cat, shaking Shin's shoulders back and forth.

"I'm fine, ain't I? And that was a lot of fun!"

Brusquely, Shin became quiet. He could feel the vibrations going through the water. As if something huge was approaching.

Immediately afterwards, a giant mermaid appeared from beneath Shin and Morgana.

"Hmph! I told you not to leave without me!" exclaimed the humongous mermaid with a pout.

She picked up Morgana, who had been lying down on her head dazedly, and placed him on the deck.

"I don't want you to leave me behind, so I'll keep you with me." said the girl.

She took Shin, and placed him right between her... more than sizeable breasts.

Few thoughts were going around Shin's head at the moment. His mind went back, to more simple times.

'Back when we walked on all fours there was a thing right in front of us, a butt. Then from the time mankind started walking on two legs, we stopped having butts sticking in our faces all the time. And in their place boobs appeared right in our faces. Women grew larger breasts to take the place of buttocks. THE ORIGINAL SOURCE OF LIFE IS THE BUTTOCKS! Boobs are just a substitute. Boobs are nothing more than a pale imitation of the buttocks! If you asked me to choose between the copy or the original, I would take the original! Hips and ass indicate fertility! Boobs jut out forward due to the process of evolution, keeping buttocks farther back and the rear hidden!'

'BUT! Now, that I am in this situation, how am I supposed to feel?!'

'You know what, let's just enjoy it.'

'Never in my life have I ever needed something so much and never known until I received it.'

Trapped in the prison of soft flesh, Shin had no way to escape. Shirahoshi had gotten a shirt to go over her halter top, as Neptune finally grew some sense and asked her to wear actual clothing.

Alternately, that meant that if Shin even managed to slip out of her boobs, he'd have to slide down several meters of thicc mermaid tummy before he even reached the fish parts.

'So this was how that old Tontatta guy felt like. Enlightening, really.'

"Go forth, my noble steed!" said Shin, taking out his left arm so he could point forward.

-INTERMISSION-

A few weeks later, in the country of Dressrosa.

Shin was currently fighting against Pica, who had assimilated himself with the entirety of the stone on the island.

It wasn't a tough fight, per se. Only very, very annoying. The tall man was moving in the inside of the giant stone golem he had made, which made finding him quite tricky.

Luckily for both Pica and the rest of Dressrosa, Caesar had come to Shin's aid before he could snap and bring into play anything stronger than what he had been using.

Yes you read that right. Caesar Clown helped Shin. Why did he of all people do that, you might ask. Well, it's a funny story.

Back on Punk Hazard, as soon as Shin met Caesar, he used his Devil Fruit power on him.

His Devil Fruit, the Samu-Samu no Mi, has the incredible power to... create corny jokes.

No, I do not kid you.

So anyways, Shin had used that power to make Caesar laugh from bad jokes until he fainted because of the lack of oxygen.

Ironic, isn't it?

Using the power of friendship and filler bs, Caesar became a good guy on Shin's crew.

Back to the fight, Pica threw a punch towards Caesar. The giant mass of stone moved too fast for Caesar to dodge.

"CAESAAAAAAAAR!!!" shouted Shin.

Immediately afterwards, a bunch of gases bundled up and formed Caesar's body.

"Why are you shouting? Did you forget I am a Logia user?" asked the 3 meters tall man, mildly amused.

"Nah, I just really wanted to do that. Reminds me of that time back in Alabasta, when we were chased by Smoker."

*Flashback*

"Nigerundayo, Smokey!"

"Hey, wait!" shouted Smoker.

*End Flashback*

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This one has no relation to the canon of the story whatsoever. I just thought it'd be funny to add these moments in here, so the chapter was thiccer.

Friendly reminder: Did you know that Bungee Gum has the properties of both rubber AND gum?!