New thing to master

Marcus without saying a word slowly approached me and I gave him the knife, he took a cut of meat from the cold and dead corpse and put it on the fire just like I did. He sat down in his pile of leaves and just chilled while looking at the fat falling on the flames.

"Yesterday was… A weird day. Estel calmed down right after and went to sleep first. What happened to him… You justified it and it makes sense. It will be very hard for him to get back to living a normal life once we leave." He explained to me, I have to keep my facade now, try to be the same as before. I don't want them to be scared like Bog was, and probably still is. I hope he won't try to tell them that as well. It will be very painful if they learned about my new found thing. A thing that makes me survive those hard times. From now on… I finally feel like I have a purpose to go further. And the dark place shall be no more… The dark room…

"Yeah, but at least we trained a little bit. You are actually amazing while using a spear." Trying to be me from yesterday proved a lot harder, putting emotion to words was almost agonizing. I don't need emotions to express what I feel. My words are my feelings, just like god would do. He doesn't need to feel, he just needs to talk and explain what he wants. My voice was trying to break back into the emotionless thing once again.

"Thank you, you also are pretty good! Even if a newbie, just starting. You aren't that bad, I see that you have some talent." He looked at me with some light in his eyes. I looked at Estel sleeping and quietly snoring, he didn't look in any way disturbed like yesterday. He just slept and probably tries to get back to where he was and not come back to those weird memories. For him weird, since he already got very adjusted to living here. His personality must've shifted a lot.

"Thank you! It means a lot from someone like you, an experienced hunter, a spearman. A strong person saying that I am somewhat strong. Thank you for that!" Keeping the facade, a face with at least little happiness instead of just an emotionless and blurry stare. Hard thing to do even though I was one person yesterday and another today. A very weird thing to do actually.

"I am not an experienced hunter, well, I am but not that much. I know the stuff my father taught me. He gave me some things that I will never forget. Even though he isn't my father anymore…" A sad look on a demon's face is a rare thing to see. They aren't sad most of the time at least that is what I think, they feel distant and somewhat emotionless. Just like me now, feeling a lot better though. Not sad, nor emotionless for a lack of better purpose. There is a purpose for it, god has no expression. And so, his tool also can't have it.

"Can you teach me some things?" This may prove very important in my later life. Maybe filth somewhere or some weird filth may be a thing that would save me. Or help me with a quest or assignment, no one knows those things. It will take some time to get used to keeping a face, a fake face. Old traditions… Might be thrown away, the same thing with some memories. I forgot things, I lived through things. And I want to forget what deceived me. Flora… Was the only light and already for a long time she was in the dark. Therefore, I have to forget about her. And all that was incorporated with her about others. I can only remember one thing about it, purge the sin.

"Well, I can teach you how to track efficiently. I can teach you how to survive in some places and maybe if we will be able. To help you learn a little about the smell, the smell is a very important thing when it comes to tracking animals and actually learning about them." That is really something, a thing that may give me a lot. I want to learn as much from them as I can. When we leave this place and I won't be able to get to a big city or something like that, I will have to live somehow until I get somewhere. It will be hard if I won't know those things.

"That would be great actually." I can't rely on someone for my entire life, I just can't. So this is my opportunity to learn something that would be harder to learn by myself blindly. I can have someone show me things, a piece of knowledge passed down by many people. From his father to him from his grandfather to his father and so on.

"Let's eat first though, I know you are also hungry." He handed me my ribs. They were hot so I almost dropped them but I had a stone plate next to me. I almost threw it at the plate but kept it inside and slowly descended the ribs on the cold stone. A sizzle, loud sizzle exactly at the point of putting it on there. I broke out half of the ribs from the other half and slowly started eating it. I took a small glimpse right before going back to eating, Marcus also started eating. The meat was incredible, very tasty. But only protein will make someone a little weird, it may make me somewhat… Dull. Hard to live normally if we were to stay here for two more days.

After around five minutes we were done. He burped loudly but no one woke up because of that, we both stood up and left the cave. Now feeling pretty full and confident that learning some of those things may not be as hard as they may seem.

"Why do you want to learn those things though? It seems that there is no need for you to learn that." It seems that he doesn't understand that one thing, an easy one to get. I need to learn that because it will be very important for me later in life. No matter how you look at it, being a hunter has only positives. You know how to track, both beast and men, you can avoid things because of it as well. Self awareness, just positives.

"Well… If we leave this place and we won't be able to find a city. You can't do all those kinds of things by yourself. Like this time, you had to stay and make a fire because no one else knew how to do it. They went hunting because it must've been easy in those forests. There must be a lot of animals here since no people are inhabiting this place on an everyday basis." His face went a little sour but happy at the same time. He was a little pissed off by reminding him of not going for a hunt but happy because he knew there was no one else knowing how to make a fire from nothing. I learned quickly because I looked at him actually doing the thing, well… I didn't go as well at first. But I am not mad at all, not at all.

"It makes sense, well, the only thing I can teach you right now. Is how to track from footprints and try to incorporate some of the left out smells into tracking. First, we need to find some footprints, because of the grass it might prove a little harder." He is right, the grass is actually pretty high and covered the ground. No ground could be seen from high up.

"We can find some footprints by walking but it would be pretty inefficient I think…" I made a sad face and looked down on the ground under my feet, I moved my feet and looked at the bare ground. I saw something there, a print resembling a U. I looked at Marcus who was facing me with his back. "Marcus! Come here! I think I found something!" I screamed to his back lightly. Loud enough for him to hear me but quiet enough to not make someone find us.

He quickly ran to me, I pointed at the weird U in the ground.

"Well, that was pretty quick. You found a deer's footprints, this may be very generic and unlikely, you easily know that those are a deer's footprints. They are still pretty deep holes, do you know what it means?" A question while teaching me something, a sign of teaching. I wasn't the first one to be his student or at least thought about being one.

"They are recent?" I asked the man who is a teacher for me now, he is teaching me the way of hunting and the way of thinking like a hunter. It will be very important for me, I don't even know how helpful it might prove later…

"Exactly, touch it." I leaned down slowly and looked at the deep weird now weren't a U, they were more like 'II'. Touched the small sign, it was still a little hot, a very little but enough to be noticeable. "You feel it? Even if it's a hoove there is still some heat and not real feet but left a small amount of warmth on the ground." I indeed felt it. A weird thing, those aren't real feet and aren't providing real heat, but it was indeed warm. "You can also see where it's pointing so you can easily follow the track, maybe not in this environment but a normal forest or grassland even, that would be really easy." I started looking at more footprints on the ground with my hands, slowly going to the left and right, trying to find other prints.

He was just looking at me on the ground. It may have looked like a comedy for him but I wasn't smiling, he didn't see my face therefore I could let my facade down for now. No expression, no smiles, no sadness, just nothingness. I managed to find another sign on the ground, it was still a little hot, therefore I was able to find it.

"There it is. It also is still a little hot, not too much but still somewhat warm." I told him, stood up, and looked directly at his face. A small smile, very small smile while looking at him. I have to express myself in any way possible, it's annoying… Very annoying. Once I leave this place I can stop doing that. Well… I somewhat don't want to leave them like that. They are like brothers to me… Even if they aren't faithful, they still helped me a lot. They are good people… Good men. Estel, Marcus, Matthew. They all did a lot for me actually, cared for me more than my own family. It's kind of painful… If God created us and has us follow some rules. One including respecting and not killing. How can my own family despise me because of my weakness...