How I became an internet sensation

So how does a eighteen year-old fresh out of high school boy, that insists he is now a man, be come an internet sensation for a period of time. Well Tiktok, Instagram, Snapchat, or YouTube usually would be the answer and that last one is sort of true but in this case it starts with a hiking trip and a rock that moves souls through parallel dimensions. While I was hiking on a quaint little mountain in the Alaskan Range a rock was sent careening for my skull and "THUNK" no more fleshy me now only a soul on a rock that now happens to slip through dimensions. Now how do I know that this soul on a rock is me and that I'm slipping through dimensions well it's not some sore of cosmic entity no its the psychedelic horror show I'm experiencing through some nonexistent sense I know have, along with the innate knowledge that I'm made of mithril somehow.

So there's the situation I found myself in those millennia ago when I first entered this realm and was forged into the being I'm now. I was a rock, a pretty rock sure, but a rock none the less in the hell hole that would latter be named Tartarus by higher powers than I. What does a rock do in the Tartarus in a time before the world began nothing I'm a rock I can't do much just what primordial being birthed from chaos and some being slaying each other. Occasionally the body of the slain beings would be taken and molded by others into weapons and land depending on the fancy and skill of the forgers. My mithril pebble self was almost destroyed multiple time in that mess but occasionally I sucked up nutrients from the slain beasts by harvesting the left over primordial energy that gave them their might and size, and so slowly I grew in density and attunement. the largest and most powerful beings I harvested energy from were two rival boar like monstrosities competing over what looked like a golden truffle of immense size and energy they slew each other letting me claim the energy of both of them.

Then the realm split open and a man with silver hair and pitch black raven like wings flew down I later learns this was Lucifer, he was followed by many being of similar for but lass majesty and presence than him. He commanded his followers to get a material antithesis of every living being from goblin to bird, dragon to wasp, and skeleton to pig. I was the material chosen to slay pigs not the best being to be the antithesis of but not the worse either. Apparently the Grand Blacksmith of Lucifer himself didn't highly of a weapon to slay pigs because he just rounded me out proclaimed me to be a weapon in the shape of a pebble. Now I lay in the armory of Lucifer the ultimate weapon for killing pigs not the best title but I'm number one at something at least, unfortunately that also meant that I had no more entertainment and had to endure the worst punishment for a teenager with undiagnosed ADHD, looking at a wall with nothing changing forever.

A couple of decades went by with nothing happening I don't recall how many but I know it wasn't a full century because I was out of the vault before the turning of the century. Lucifer declared the day he descended as the Zeroth day of the Zeroth month of the Zeroth year, I was starting to think Lucifer was sent here because he was being to edgy.

I was eventually used by the "honorable" Demon clan of Hekatonkheires the hundred armed ones to be thrown at the divine hos guarding the primordial Garden of Eden the battle was log and lasted centuries but eventually the demons were pushed back to Tartarus I slayed at least a hundred billion hogs in that war.

Millenia passed and a young hero blasted into the House of the Hekatonkheires and tried to slay them he failed but made of with loot including me and so the next chapter of my life began in the mortal realms. I was passed from person to person once being used to skip across a lake, I was a pebble after all. One day a young boy named Mardosa found me he was a farmer's son and used me to scare off crows until one day he met a hog trying to break into the farms cabbage field he threw me and the primordial properties rushed through my being and I once again was slaying pigs like I was forged to.

Mardosa became the knight errant of a lord whose territory bordered on the land of the Hog-Kin a loose group of monsters and semi-sentient beings mostly categorized by their hog like ancestry and insatiable apatite for anything organic. he used me to carve out a chunk of land from the beasts and was then wed to the daughter of his lord and later pronounced a grand duke for his land and power almost outstripped the kingdom he pledged loyalty to and grownup in. Years passed and old and nearing the end of his life Mardosa Heard of a Beast of immense power making its way up north it ate anything and everything in its path and had thick coat of hair and skin impervious to all weapons and he heard of its name Atalanta the Boar of Gluttony he knew what had to be done he took me for one final journey south to the plains there he saw Atalanta and strangely I knew this beast it was the pig who ate the golden truffle years ago when I was but a rock. Mardosa winded up and poured the last of his vitality into me and threw me I pierced the skull of Atalanta and destroyed its essence with the power lying in me then Mardosa, guardian of the pebble fell to his knees and passed from this world, leaving behind the mighty weapon. For he knew, that one day, its power would be required once more.

The Legacy of the Pebble lives on.