This Wasn't the Plan

"That's a real thing?"

Harris moved, slumping against the door frame. Joshua went with him, Harris's thumbs slipping over his cheekbones. "When I tried to set you up with people before, I was doing my job. I actually got your parents together. It's probably strange for you to know that. My kind live in the world, for the most part, though our headquarters is technically beyond it. People… can see us, because sometimes our jobs demand it. Like the story I told you about bumping into Cytherea that day. I did it so she'd meet Mary because I knew Cytherea would be good for her. Mary was my charge at that time. The next one was- or rather 'is'- you. But while people can see us, they don't notice us, and when they're forced to acknowledge us, the brain tries to explain away how difficult it is to pay any attention to us by making us seem boring. It's why when I introduced you to my 'friends' from work you found them so dull. And it's why your friends and even your mother never took an interest in me. Children are an exception. In theory, we can learn about our charges and go almost completely unnoticed that way. But 'you' could see me. I still have no idea why."

Joshua eyes were wide, but he didn't draw away.

Harris pressed on. "I need you to know that I had no idea that 'this' was even possible. That I haven't done anything to manipulate your life in quite some time. And that I never did anything to make you fall in love with me. That's not how it works. I can see interest and compatibility between other people, and steer them toward or away from each other, maybe strengthen or weaken that interest a bit- but I can't make feelings that aren't there, and I genuinely had no idea that you had feelings for me- or vice versa- until tonight. This was not the plan."

"Yes, you did," Joshua said quietly.

Harris stared into the beautiful face held between his hands. "What?"

Joshua pressed closer, resting his cheek against Harris's jaw. "I'm not saying that I don't believe you. I never thought for a second that you would have forced me into this, whether you had the power to or not- not that it isn't a comfort to know that you can't do that. I just mean that you did make me fall in love with you."

"I didn't mean to."

Joshua smiled, and it lit up his whole face. "That's why you're the one, innit?"

"Don't say that," Harris whispered.

"Why not?"

"Because I don't know if I can stay. None of this is supposed to happen. You weren't supposed to be able to see me. I wasn't supposed to fall for you and you certainly weren't supposed to fall for me. I don't know if they'll let me-"

"I don't care."

Harris swallowed. "You don't?"

Joshua's face contorted, expression going oddly tender. "I mean- I do 'care.' I don't know what I'm gonna do if I can't keep you. But right now, tonight, I don't even give a fuck what's gonna happen in the morning as long as you touch me."

"Joshua," he whispered, and stopped. He had been right before, even if he had been wrong about what he felt for Joshua. And Joshua was right now. Whatever time they had left, even if it wasn't much, they should spend it together. "Stay the night." This time it was loaded with everything that it hadn't been before.

If Joshua's smile turned a little bittersweet, it was still beautiful. "Yes, Harris."

Harris kissed that smile, slow and a little bit messy, Joshua whining sweetly beneath him. Harris would have been happy to just kiss him like that for hours- taste him properly, learn the curves of his lips and the strong line of his teeth- but Joshua couldn't have been comfortable craning up like that, so Harris wasn't surprised when Joshua took control, grabbing Harris by the collar of his robe and tugging him towards the bed.

Harris stopped him, catching those hands as they wandered downward and undid the belt of his robe. "Harris," Joshua said, pressing up against Harris's chest again as Harris's robe fell open. "If you say that you want to take this slowly after everything, I ain't gonna be responsible for my actions."

Harris laughed and pressed a reverent kiss to Joshua's temple. "No," he said. "I only meant to say that I'd rather have you in my bed."

"That so?" Joshua asked. He was keeping a straight face but his eyes were dancing.

"It is."

Joshua's lips twitched. "Okay," he said. Harris released his hands, but neither of them made a move for the door. Despite his words, Joshua seemed content to take his time. His fingers trailed along the hem of Harris's shirt. "What was you doing in here anyway?"

"I came in to check if you'd taken everything with you, if you'd have to come back."

Joshua's fingers slipped underneath the shirt. "I was always gonna come back."

Harris sighed, oddly relieved to hear it even though the worst was already over, and then his breath hitched as one of Joshua's hands trailed over his stomach. "I stayed because I could smell you on the pillow."

"You fucking freak," Joshua said, voice all helpless affection, eyes wide. "I can 'not' believe you ever thought that we weren't-"

Harris cut him off with hard kiss, fingers tight on his chin. "Yes."

Joshua wasn't done. The moment Harris released him he continued. "The way you would hold me," he said, settling closer. "And kissing my hand." His hand slid over bare skin up Harris's torso, a nail grazing Harris's nipple and making him hiss. "Calling me darling."

Harris stroked up Joshua's jaw and pressed his fingers into Joshua's hair, drawing him to his chest. Joshua's rested his head there without complaint as Harris reached down and found Joshua's free hand, lifting it to his lips. "Darling," he said, kissing Joshua's knuckles. He let his tongue slip between them, and heard Joshua whimper softly. He looked and saw that Joshua's eyes had gone positively black.

"Take me to bed," Joshua grated out.

"Yes," Harris replied, and did.