50

"Remind me again why we gave in so easily and came here?" Greta is still sulking as I unpack my case into the empty closet of the apartment Jyeon organised for us. Tired after our trip and not up to another argument over this. It's all we've done since they showed up two days ago. She's mad at me for falling into his trap and doesn't understand how little choice we had.

"Because this way it's still my choice, in my control. I can call the shots and make demands. He's playing nice and looking to keep me sweet, so I don't make waves in his perfectly constructed life. He would probably have kidnapped me and locked me in a psyche ward if we fought. Treating me for non-existent amnesia." I point out and push past her to start pulling open empty drawers.

We went over this. That resistance is futile, and I have to be careful about the methods of treatment they might subject me to if he got complete control. I still don't understand his motives, and I didn't sleep at all these past couple of nights thinking it over.

Why Jyeon came back for me when in reality, he could have ignored my existence and lived on, keeping my money and shares and having everything his way. Seeing as I adamantly refused the return and didn't seem to know him. I could have lived that way for the rest of my days, and he would have had no comeback. No contest for OLO or my money.

Bringing me back to life will be messy for him because of the fake body and having all my assets reversed, and position re-engaged. It will bring up so many questions, public criticism, and not to mention a process of removing from him what mine is. It could backfire, and my 'memories' could pop up and mess with whatever it is he thinks he's gaining.

The only thing I can think of and make sense if the role was reversed is keeping me close to control the fallout. To see how much I know about my death and his part in it. To push me into a space where I think I can trust him and drop any ideas of revenge and still hand over what's mine in the end. He's manoeuvring a clean outcome to cover all aspects and all possibilities.

He brings me back, publicly reinstates me and spins the yarn about my memory loss. Comes up with a convincing story about my fake remains, seems to be the caring husband who nurses me back to health, still ends up with everything and a divorce. Nothing left in the closet to ruin his future.

Then he can move on with his lover without public scrutiny and remarry to his heart's content while still getting OLO. Averting a scandal. Maybe he thinks he can manipulate my memory loss in some way. I'm sure the last two years, he's had to hide away his girlfriend so as not to have gossip columns discuss the morality of how quickly he moved on. Image is everything in our world. My being alive gives him a convenient out. Due to my no longer loving him because of memory loss, he can publicly divorce and move on.

He should have just quietly ended me correctly, and no one would have known. The village is small and remote, and there are so many dangerous things in fishing life that he could have come up with another accidental disappearance. I don't get this whole game we have going on here. I guess murder is no longer a benefit to him.

I refuse to believe it's a genuine need to bring me home and have me back in his life. I remember everything as though it was yesterday, and the pain of his betrayal is still a metal blade in my heart. I know how little love he has for me.

"Why did you agree to see the house with him alone? I thought bringing me here was to keep me by your side, to be safe." Greta opens her case and starts following my example, putting away the clothing we brought to last a month.

"If he wanted to hurt me in some way, he wouldn't have let you come in the first place... or brought me close to home. I don't know what it will feel like seeing that house again, being there. I just want some time alone to process it, I guess. Not have you fighting with him and riling him up. This is all still hard for me."

We don't know how long this will take as our plan is unclear, and I don't know how I'm meant to start regaining memories. Jyeon thinks letting me explore the house will be a step in trying to rekindle forgotten memories. I have to figure out how to make it believable when I start acting like they do. Soon as I can convince him, I remember how much I loathe him; we can divorce, and I can leave. Goodbye to hiding and him.

"What about your mother in law and brother? You don't want me there when you face them?"

"You heard him. They're not here yet. Yoonie accompanied his mother abroad for treatment, and he hasn't told them about me. They come back in a few days. We'll cross that hurdle then."

Greta's upset with me for so many reasons, including them, but I feel like this is something I have to do alone. It's not easy for me being here and pretending, and I find it hard enough without having her there too. I need to face my past alone, standing on my own two feet. I can't run away this time.

"I hate all of this. I feel so powerless against these people. He really has you over a barrel, and I can't believe how much wealth can screw over normal folk like us." Grete slumps down on the bed and allows herself to flop back into a star shape that covers half the clothing she just pulled out.

"I know. Trust in me, and we will get back home soon enough. I don't intend to drag this out. A few fluttering memories appear first, and then I'll open a floodgate. Once I tell him I remember everything, it's end game. I dump my shares, my marriage, take what's mine from my parents, and the village never worries about cash ever again." That's the plan anyway. All I have of one so far.

"I honestly still don't think of you as worth billions or being this person. As much as I kept looking you up last night and reading all about your achievements, I can't connect that woman to who you are now."

"I'm not her anymore, and I don't want to be. Look at what she ended up with. A husband who cheated and then killed her….. Everyone just got on with their lives without me. Easily." I point out and then jump at the sudden invasion of a door knock. It's a rattle of an impatient person.

"No guesses who that might be!" Greta states blankly. "He barely gave you breathing room on the boat or in the car, and now he can't give you an hour to unpack. Anyone would think he cares." She rolls over onto her belly, making it clear she's not answering it, and I eyeroll.