38 Chapter Thirty Eight

"Your Highness!" The maids shouted, worried.

Soon then, in the dining room was left just Nicholas and me alone. All the maids went to look for Prince Noah.

"I think I should go after him too." I said raising from my seat.

"You don't have to go, Alex. Noah is always like this when things don't go his way. When he calms down he will come back." Nicholas said, unconcerned about Prince Noah.

I stared at Nicholas unsure, I knew he wasn't wrong, but…

"Don't you like him, Nicholas?" I asked, looking at Nicholas's eyes.

"Huh?" Nicholas stammered, confused.

"Don't you like Prince Noah, Nicholas?" I asked again.

"Yes… Of course I like Noah." Nicholas answered looking at me confused.

"If you like him, shouldn't you have to go after him?" I asked.

"Why should I? He is always like that…" Nicholas said crossing his arms and looking away annoyed.

I sighed.

'Even though Nicholas has feelings for Prince Noah, he doesn't take any initiative towards him. This way they will never end up together.' I realized, frustrated.

"That day when you ran away from me in the royal library, do you know why I decided to go after you?" I asked, looking at Nicholas's eyes that weren't avoiding mine anymore.

"It is because I didn't want to lose your friendship, that is why I went after you, to try to understand your feelings so I wouldn't commit the same mistakes again… You said to me once that Prince Noah is hotheaded and easily get mad, but have you ever tried to ask him why he is like that?" I asked.

Nicholas looked at me surprised, he opened his mouth to say something, but then he closed it soon after and looked away.

Since the day I met Prince Noah I've been annoyed by his behavior. He has been always so arrogant to me, and I didn't know if he would get mad at me or not whenever I said something.

But as the days passed I noticed how lonely Prince Noah actually was. I can count on my fingers how many times he met his brother or his father. He only has the maids around him, people that are only with him because they are paid to serve and care for him.

There is no warmth in his life.

'And now one of the few friends he has is trying to get closer to someone else.' I realized looking at Nicholas.

"When you like and cherish someone you should be open to trying to understand them and don't belittle their feelings, even if it seems immature and egoistical their attitudes, sometimes it may have a big reason behind their behavior…" I said to Nicholas, though it was the first time I realized it myself.

Nicholas was silent avoiding my gaze when he suddenly shouted.

"Even if I go after Noah I won't apologize to him! It's is always like this, whenever Noah got mad I am the one that should apologize just because Noah is a prince!"

I looked at him surprised.

'It must have been hard for Nicholas to grow up with a friend like Prince Noah, probably whenever something happened he was the one supposed to apologize maybe even if he wasn't in the wrong just because of the difference in their status.' I realized.

"I'm not saying you should apologize to him, Nicholas. I just want you both to understand each other better, aren't you friends?" I asked looking into his eyes.

'If you want to date Noah one day, you can't let your pride get above your feelings towards him forever.' I thought.

Nicholas clicked his tongue and said. "Ok, let's look for him."

I got excited seeing that Nicholas wanted to finally talk with Prince Noah.

"Alright, let's go!" I said, smiling.

We left the dining room and then Nicholas asked. "Where should we go first?"

I thought for a moment and then I had an idea. "Let's split, you go there and I go this way, like this we can cover more area and find Prince Noah faster."

Nicholas didn't seem to like my idea but still, he agreed with me. "Alright."

Nicholas and I then went in opposite directions, but I quickly stopped to look back and see Nicholas running to look for Prince Noah, and I giggled.

'Nicholas must know Prince Noah better than anyone else here, he will soon find him.' I thought, excited.

That, actually, was my plan all along. I wanted Nicholas to be the one to find Prince Noah and comfort him.

'If this was a bl novel this would definitely be a key point in their relationship, where they would get closer and understand each other more.' I thought, playfully.

"I hope they end up together one day."

***

Even though I had no intentions to find Prince Noah, I walked awhile with no directions through the palace to make it seems I was looking for him.

'I am still Prince Noah's servant, if people see me doing nothing while everyone is looking for him, I may end up getting in trouble for nothing.' I thought.

"Where is Prince Noah, though? Did Nicholas find him already?" I whispered to myself, bored.

I sighed.

'If I was Prince Noah where would I go?' I asked myself.

"Well, since he is a prince there is no way he would go unnoticed in this palace full of people... So, if he didn't want to be seen, he probably would go somewhere there is no one around." I realized.

Then I remembered that day I met Prince Noah while I was looking for Nicholas, near the tree Nicholas left those letters for me.

'That place is perfect to be alone, it is far from the main building and there is no one around… Maybe, is that why I met Prince Noah that day because something had happened to him and he wanted to be alone?'

I don't know why, but as soon as I realized that, I decided to look for Prince Noah there.

Was it out of curiosity and I wanted to know if I was right?

Or was it because I was worried about him?

I didn't know the reason, all I knew was that I wanted to find him.

"...Prince… Noah?" I said surprised between my deep exhausted breaths after running all the way to find him.

A few meters away from me Prince Noah was sitting in the shadows of a tree, leaning on its base. He had his head in his arms, resting on his knees, he didn't see me until he heard my voice.

When he raised his head and saw it was me, he got nervous and quickly got up from the ground and shouted at me.

"Don't come here! Go away!"

Though I was meters away from him I could see he was crying. He started clumsily wiping his tears with the sleeves of his shirt trying to hide the fact that he was crying from me.

I didn't leave, but I also didn't approach him. I didn't know what to say to him, so all I did was stand there in silence, waiting for him to calm down.

"...What are you doing here?" He asked with a quavering voice like someone trying not to cry.

"I was looking for you, Your Highness." I answered, but quickly Prince Noah shouted back.

"Why are you doing this?! You are Nicholas's servant now, so go away!"

"As far as I know I didn't accept Nicholas's proposal, Your Highness." I said, trying to calm him, but it seemed to get the opposite effect since he got even angrier.

"Why wouldn't you want to be his servant?! I know you don't like me, nobody does, I know that!" Prince Noah shouted.

"Your Highness, why are you saying that?" I asked, worried, approaching him.

"Because it is always like this, everyone always abandons me!" Prince Noah shouted, mad, and then he couldn't hold anymore and tears started to fall from his eyes again.

"Your Highness…" I didn't know what to say to comfort him, all I could do was stand there looking at him, worried.

"After my mother died everything changed! My father was never around, Dylan became distant, and the only person I had by my side was Isabel, but even her became different and abandoned me… Everyone turned their back on me when they discovered I was a fire mage, even my family did!" Prince Noah vented between the tears.

He lost his mother at such young age, and then he had to watch his family slowly becoming distant. And things just got worse after his status as a royal was questioned when it was discovered that he was a fire mage. He completely lost the life he was used to.

That is why he is so diligent at everything he does and gets frustrated so easily, because no matter how much he tries nobody acknowledges him.

On one side he has a perfect older brother that everyone compliments and respect, and on the other, his twin sister, a light mage, the most important type of mage in this world.

'While Prince Noah, in everyone's eyes, will never be good enough.' I realized.

Prince Noah was trembling and crying, trying to hide in vain his tears wiping them with his sleeves. "Go away… Leave me alone."

Usually, I would just follow his orders, but this time I didn't.

'I was wrong.'

I thought Prince Noah got mad and run away because he was jealous and didn't want Nicholas to get closer to someone else, but probably when Nicholas said to me to choose between them, the fear of being rejected again in front of everyone may be what has triggered him.

'...Prince Noah fears being abandoned again.' I realized.

This time looking at Prince Noah I couldn't see the arrogant boy that always annoyed me, all I could see was a child that was crying and hurt because had to deal with too many things a child shouldn't have to.

Not knowing how I could comfort him, I hugged him tightly.

Prince Noah tried to push me away, surprised, but I didn't let him go.

"W-What are you doing?" He asked, embarrassed.

"You said that I didn't like you, but that is not true because I like you!" When I said that Prince Noah stopped pushing me away.

"After all you have done for me all I can be is grateful for you, Your Highness." I said, hugging him tighter.

It was thanks to Prince Noah that leaving the northwest area was the best thing I had ever done. After becoming his servant I have a big and warm room just for me, new clothes, and good food every day, not having to worry if I will starve the next day or have to eat leftovers.

'But all I gave back to him was just some empty thank-yous.' I realized not proud of myself.

Even after knowing that Prince Noah was basically an outcast in the palace, besides trying to comfort him or even trying to become friends and closer to him, all I did was turn the blind eye to his situation.

'I didn't want to compromise myself, and in the end, I just saw Prince Noah as a tool to have a secure and calm life until I left the palace.' I realized, feeling guilty.

Then I broke the hug and looking into Prince Noah's teary eyes I said smiling. "I owe you a lot, Your Highness."

'And this time I really mean that.' I thought, decided to repay Prince Noah someway one day.

Prince Noah looked at me surprised, but then he turned his face away and wiped the tears with his fist.

He seemed to get more calm and didn't seem to be crying anymore. After a moment in silence, Prince Noah suddenly said avoiding my eyes.

"If you want you can go with Nicholas…I know he will be a good master to you."

I was surprised, I wasn't expecting him to say that. I thought he wouldn't let me go.

'Going with Nicholas would be indeed a good choice for me, but I already had made my decision.' I thought.

"If it is what you wish, I will go with Nicholas, then. But I'm still your servant, so I will do as you say, Your Highness." I said, determined.

Prince Noah was surprised. He opened his mouth, but then quickly closed it. He didn't answer me for a while until he suddenly held my sleeve and looking in my eyes he said.

"Please… stay with me, Alex."

With a smile on my face, I proudly said.

"Yes, Your Highness."