webnovel
NovelAffliction17
NovelAffliction17Lv154yr
2020-02-07 04:51

Awesome characters liked the story progression up until the ryoji temple arc because it seemed to be so rushed, all the guys should have been taken to the temple and the girls taken in as ninja possibly made allies that way. overall a great genre to take inspiration from just need a d&d type board game to run so many possibilities and roll with the best story but no matter how you look at it having time to mature a storyline is always best concerning quality other than that loved the immersive storytelling great job authorsan. 😅👍

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Jack_Balu
Jack_BaluLv3

I found a book its named Story of legends i recommend it book was amazing you should check it out

Other Reviews
Kiti
KitiLv13

The quality of this novel is much better than most in Qidian, The writer's writing skill is pretty good, and he's very clear in what direction he wants to take his story forward. The writing is void of *******ism, which is rare to find in Qidian. The writer's command of english is very good. However, I felt his understanding of Japanese culture isn't sufficient enough. The biggest problem to the storytelling is the attempt to blend and use old Japanese, modern Japanese, and modern english words and terms to tell the story. Very frustrating for me to see other characters keep calling the mc Miura-kun, as if he's a high school boy in shounen novel. Also, his sister (Very shounen sister, she has all the traits) calling him nii-san and nii-chan instead of Aniue or Onii-sama/san (It actually should be Tadakata-Onii-sama/san, because she has another older brother, especially when all three of them are presented). These details are important, at least I deem them to be when the Author expects us to learn the archaic Japanese words for 'spearman' and 'archer'. If you want to be that authentic, you need to walk the whole nine yards, not using english pound for draw weight, and definitely not having these Japanese characters talk like modern people. This breaks the story for me, more than anything else. I'm very critical when I comment, especially when I recognize that the Author is competent. Mark twain once said "The difference between the right word and the almost right word is really a large matter – it is the difference between the lightning and the lightning bug.", and this sums up my feeling of this novel. I know that the story will get better, and it's actually top-tier when you compared to other webnovels, but please for the love of all things holy and good, be more careful with details. This later part of comment is just nitpicking: The mc is typical, in the way a genius mc in webnovel is. The achilles's heel of writing this type of mc is that he's expected to be very good with science, and anytime he isn't, that breaks the reading experience. The most glaring example is from Ch.1 when he tried to explain the time-traveling conundrum: Yes, sentience is weightless, but it has mass. The different between weight and mass is basic science. This is Ch.1, and I already doubt the mc intelligent, and my prejudice against him being a genius has formed. So his subsequent actions will be question every time they make no sense. It's one of the reasons I dread genius mc, and it turned me away from the story when I read this kind of sloppiness. You can't be a technological genius when the A.I. you created—after it evolved to its v.1000, self-claimed as the peak of technology, and even capable of time-traveling—still don't have a 'please confirm option'. To put it into perspective, even the Gameboy version of Pokemon has this option when you select your first Pokemon. That game is sold in 1995, when we still listen to our music through cassette tape, and I can say for certain though it has entertain a whole generation of mankind, it sure hasn't reach the peak of technology yet. Also, I don't think the Sengoku period is the time for peacefully raising your family, the only thought I've when reading this was, 'The mc and the A.I., they aren't that intelligent, aren't they?' This part is so contradicting to the mc character and his pet A.I., even truck-kun makes more sense.

DBBlackfyre
DBBlackfyreLv1
Precheur
PrecheurLv5
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