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Writing quality: It's decent. I am not a native English speaker, so I don't know if it's up to par for people with high standards. Story development: Well, as the author said, the plot isn't serious, so for those hoping to read serious stuff, it's not the place for you. Character Design: It could have been a lot better if he weren't overpowered from the start. Though I can expect some character development, right? Updating stability: 5 stars, no questions asked. World Background: 5 stars because I see potential, and adding KNB in Food Wars is just the pushy on top. This fanfiction is good for passing the time, and I know some people may not like it, but do your best, Breadtoast.
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This chapter is good and no Chinese vibes.
yeah, maybe you can work on your dailogues. I've read more than 200 mtl novels, and I'm certain that your way of writing dailogues quite matches mtl fics. And yeah, the major factor would be Alice, I suggest you to watch her clips and grasp the way she speaks.
Why do I feel like I am reading a Chinese novel. The first 5 chapters didn't gave me this vibe.
Chi..Chinese?
She felt like she was a fairy dancing in a dream. A strange cocoon materialized before her. With a sudden crack, it split open, revealing Tsuna wearing a prince attire with fairy like wings on his back. She offered her hand for a dance. Yet, in a swift and unexpected move, he cuts her wings and caged her for eternity.
well, nothing against you but if I continue further i will feel like i'm reading about a guy trying to be Sakuna. Anyway, best of luck, don't care about my opinion.
Writing quality: I can't say much about it since I am not a native English speaker, but it is okay for me. Phrasing could be a lot better, this author has tons of experience, but his writing style is pretty bland, like a newbie's. Not saying it's bad, but for a guy like him, it could have been better. ChatGPT might help you with that. The story development is okay for now. The author had a good chance for character development, especially with the milf, but... sigh~ The story could have been much better with more character development. The first few chapters were interesting, but the latter part kind of let down because nothing interesting is happening in the 'High School of the Dead' world. That world is plain as heck, which is also why I find it a little boring reading the latter chapters. And I just hope you use the 'Demon Slayer' world well and build some tension to engage the reader. Lastly, from what I have seen or think, the author probably didn't finish his outline or maybe is only halfway through. Please don't do that, because you'll be confused after some time. It will affect the quality and idk how I wrote more than 1k words. Best of luck and I am no professional author, I just said what I felt like, so you don't need to take me seriously.