This platform is honestly terrible. I despise sloppy for-profit novels, they're almost always terrible. Stupid toxic culture of this platform values quantity over quality.
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If the author takes his time to think about half the stuff he's written, this could be pretty decent. As it is now, it's not good, which is average for this site. Decent idea, horrendous execution.
You must use Grammarly, there are quite a few incorrect word choices. The program probably ate the correct ones.
The formatting is a serious mess.
This needs some editing. Some quotations start, and never end. It gets hard to distinguish the dialogue from the narration. "This is how it should start, and end; when someone is talking." 'This is the standardized notation for how thoughts(Internal Dialogue) are communicated in published stories.' -I'm not quite sure what this is, I think you use it to indicate internal dialogue, but usually, there isn't a closing mark, so...- There's some rough grammar, and poor word choice but it isn't a bad fic.
Eh, there are different kinds of soulbinding, wasn't sure what type you were going for. At least until the second chapter, I suppose.
As depicted by someone, who's clearly never lived a life outside of themselves. Considering all you have to express are stereotypes, your opinion doesn't actually matter, does it?
... A so I mean, what happens if the phone gets stolen? Why not just go for a mental interface?
Kendo, seriously? I could understand wanting to be talented in the use of bladed weapons, but limiting yourself to just swords? It seems pretty stupid. I can understand wanting to do a Jumpchain, but you could at least try to get the name correct.
Jeez, the MC is just pointlessly hostile.