Chapter 13: Shib sam ♡

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

His heart was threatening to jump out of his chest as he headed towards the old building. He was going to his first therapy session – it was Yoongi's recommendation so he knew he could trust whoever he was going to spend the following hour with. The only problem was that he didn't really want to talk to anyone. He knew it was for the best and he knew he promised he will try his hardest but anxiety filled his brain at the thought of sharing his deepest secrets with a stranger.

So he stopped in front of the massive door and stared at the polished wood for a few seconds before turning around and almost running away. His breathing was hitched when he decided to enter a nice-looking cafe, his lungs burning with the shame he had to bear. He failed once again and he was so scared of the outcome that he turned off his phone, taking a seat at the smallest table he could spot and ordering the first drink he saw on the menu.

The rest of the day has been stressful, nervousness cascading over him whenever he received a new message from Jungkook. For the first time ever he was glad that his boyfriend had a full day at work because he couldn't have looked at him after working so hard in order to avoid a serious conversation. He had dinner with Taehyung and Bunny and fell asleep on his best friend's bed, their fingers intertwined in between their bodies.

"Wake up, princess." The whisper had him moaning in disapproval and he buried his face further into the soft pillow. "I've made you breakfast!" The offended tone was the one that convinced the pink-haired boy to open his eyes sleepily.

"Thanks." He mumbled and petted the black cat curled by his side.

They watched cartoons until they had to head to uni and Jimin decided to dress prettily as he was going to meet Jungkook in the afternoon. He put on one of his favourite baby blue sweater that was a little too large and kissed his best friend's cheek before they parted with the promise that they will message each other.

He wanted to surprise the tattoo artist so around seven o'clock he headed to the parlour, hoping his boyfriend would agree to have dinner together. The closing time was flexible because it depended a lot on the clients they were last facing but he could wait if that was the case so he entered the place, his cheeks pink because of the cold weather. Jungkook was in his usual corner but he was not dealing with a client, instead focusing on a very tall man who was sporting sleeve and neck tattoos. He had purple hair and glasses and his huge grin caused for deep dimples to appear on both his cheeks, innocent being the only word with which Jimin could have described them.

He didn't want to intervene so he bit on his lower lip until Yoongi looked up from the utensils he was cleaning and noticed him.

"Jungkook, visitors!" The pink-haired boy waved shyly at the elder and looked at the brown-haired man who forgot all about his conversation in order to detect the newcomer. His doe eyes lit up as he studied the familiar face and a bunny grin mirrored a small smile, his legs finally carrying his body towards the smaller one.

"Hi." The tall man watched them from his place, awkwardly leaning against the large black tattoo chair. "What a surprise." Their lips met in a chaste but sweet kiss for a few seconds, a big hand caressing white skin.

"Are you free?" Jimin felt too nervous to look around the room because they were in public so he focused on the other's face, cinnamon orbs filled with hope.

"We done for today, I was just helping Namjoon-hyung out with some things."

That was the name of their new-coworker; Jungkook told him he was an old friend of Yoongi who just came back from the United States so curiosity got the best of him and he dared to look at the kind-looking giant once again, his cheeks flushing when their eyes met. His boyfriend intertwined their fingers before guiding him towards his corner with the obvious intention to introduce him to the stranger.

"Hyung, this is Jimin, my boyfriend."

"It's nice to meet you, Jimin-ah. I'm Namjoon." The student had no idea why but once they shook hands he felt like the elder was the type of person he could have trusted. He didn't know how to start a conversation, though, so he was glad that Jungkook took over and began to talk about the tattoos they executed, grabbing his phone to show him pictures of them. Namjoon was really good at his job and he understood that he was an expert when it came to dotwork because the results were absolutely amazing.

His compliments were minimal compared to Jungkook's overflowing praises so he felt a little out of place because he has never seen the elder so impressed by someone else. It was cute but also slightly worrying because he knew nothing he could do would ever cause such a strong reaction. His thoughts were interrupted by Yoongi who was having a conversation on the phone, most likely with Hoseok.

"Dinner?" His question came out rather awkward but he focused on Jungkook's face, waiting for a reply that could get him out of that place. He needed time to feel at ease around new people and he wasn't ready to try to get accustomed to the new guy's presence. He sensed things were not going to go his way when his boyfriend's eyebrows furrowed above his eyes so he prepared himself for a refuse.

"I promised I would go out for drinks with the guys." Jungkook was obviously regretting that he couldn't grant his wish. "I'm sorry, baby. Do you want to tag along?"

Going to a bar was not on his wish list because he was tired and all he wanted was to end the day quietly but there was still a hope for him.

"Will Seok-hyung come too?"

"Hobi spent the entire day at the dance studio, he'll probably spend the night watching dramas." Yoongi intervened and stretched his arms, resembling a cat. "You could go to our place and join him if you want." That sounded a lot more tempting so he made sure everyone would be alright with the concept before deciding to accept.

"Sounds fun." Jungkook sighed and wrapped his arms around him. His bright mood was obvious because he wasn't holding back from PDA. "Next time I'll join you."

"I don't know if you'll be allowed, though." The pink-haired boy grinned and was quick to pull away when he felt agile fingers slipping under his sweater in order to tickle his sides. He giggled and grabbed his boyfriend's hands so they would stay in place before raising on his tiptoes and kissing a button nose.

"You're such a brat." Jungkook chuckled but didn't move away. "Let's have lunch together tomorrow."

"It's a deal."

He began to feel nervous as soon as he communicated the foreign address to the taxi driver so he wrapped his arms around his body and looked outside the window at the frame of his boyfriend who was making sure he was safe and sound. He wanted to spend time with Hoseok but a part of him was still hoping he would somehow end sleeping in Jungkook's arms. It was selfish of him so chased the thought away, looking at the car was passing by, wondering how far away Yoongi and Hobi's apartment was.

It took the cab 20 minutes to park in front of an old building so he paid and headed towards the front door, hoping his memory was not going to betray him. Thankfully, Hobi was already waiting for him and pulled him into a tight hug as if he was trying to glue all his pieces back together. It was incredible how well they got along so he knew his friend was aware that he needed this type of comfort, especially that his romantic relationship has been bumpy lately. It didn't matter that they kissed and hugged, he was aware there was a possibility of them never going back to what they had before and maybe that was what made him feel so anxious. Jungkook was doing perfectly fine without him, he found an interesting person to fancy and occupy his time with.

"Welcome, Minnie ~" He smiled widely at the nickname and hurried to untie his shoelaces, curious to enter the flat. He couldn't imagine their friends' tastes combining because they were so different but the mix turned out better than he expected. It was a tad smaller than Jungkook's apartment but it was tastefully decorated. Hoseok has been baking cookies so they ended up eating some while watching dramas and he would have lied if he would have said that he was paying attention to the tv screen.

He was curious about Jungkook's evening. He was probably having fun, not sparing him a thought.

"Are you okay?" He nodded but Hobi could see right through him because he muted the k-drama and turned so they would face each other. "Is it about Gguk?"

"Kind of." He scrunched his nose, not sure if he should share his thoughts. "I'm just... worried, I guess." They have both been busy so they didn't have the physical time to rebound and it hurt him to know they could lose it all because of a stupid misunderstanding. He wanted to gain Jungkook's trust and he wanted the man to trust him. "What if we only grow further apart from now on?"

"And why would that happen?"

"Because we –" They didn't properly kiss, they didn't go on a proper date either, they didn't make love, as cheesy that could have sounded. Maybe the tattoo artist was trying to give him time and respect his boundaries but he felt lonely. "It's not the same."

"It's not supposed to be, baby. It was your first serious fight and you have both been hurt so it's only normal for things not to go back to normal right away. You're both maturing." He didn't want to mature if maturing meant straying away from each other. "You should tell him how you feel."

"But he hasn't done anything bad, I'm the one being problematic and I don't want to worsen the situation." Hobi's eyes widened in surprise at his choice of words. He didn't really understand what was going on until his friend moved closer and pulled him into a bear hug, barely allowing him to breathe for a few seconds.

"Gguk loves you and I know he'd love to hear what bothers that pretty mind of yours."

The redhead was right – he needed to trust that his boyfriend would never find his thoughts annoying but that was such a hard thing to do when all your life you've been taught to keep your problems for yourself. He's been told countless times that his existence was a menace so he tried to speak about what was bothering him as little as he could so he wouldn't irritate the people around him. But Jungkook was not like everybody else, he was always trying to nudge his ideas, absorbing his every word like it was the most important thing in the world.

They spent more than an hour cuddling and Jimin's mood improved because of all the silly things the elder told him – from how well Yoongi could fake annoyance to silly old stories about their group of friends. Hoseok knew Namjoon too because he was one of the few people his boyfriend has been corresponding with ever since they started dating. Midnight came without them sensing the passing of time so the student was invited to spend the night there only for their conversation to be interrupted by a phone call.

Jungkook was drunk so the teal-haired tattoo artist called Hobi to ask if he could pick them up.

"Do you want me to bring him here?"

"I think it would be better if you would drop us off at his place." Jimin replied without thinking twice, curiosity filling his brain. He was wondering how his boyfriend would act when intoxicated so in about an hour he figured he was the affectionate type of drunk because a beer-tasting mouth searched for his before the elder could sit on the backseat properly.

"You're awake!" Jungkook sounded suspiciously enthusiastic so Jimin nodded and smiled amused as Yoongi occupied the passenger seat. "I would have messaged you but I thought you already fell asleep. It's late, baby boys should be sleeping." The tone was low and even if the words were slurred, Jimin couldn't ignore the innuendo so he felt his cheeks heating.

"Kookie!" He tried to admonish but it was futile.

"It's Daddy for you, kitten." The pink-haired boy wanted to believe that Yoongi accidentally turned on the radio at the perfect time but something was telling him that he was tired of hearing their borderline indiscreet conversation. "Fuck, you're so pretty. I want to eat you up."

It was clear that he consumed way too many drinks and Jimin was thankful that the ride didn't last long because he couldn't have looked into his friends' eyes again if things would have progressed. By the time they got out of the car Jungkook managed to leave hickeys on the side of his neck and he decided it was for the best because the elder's provoking words would have only done worst.

"Up you go." Jimin whispered and helped the tattoo artist out of the car but not before thanking Hobi for the ride.

"Good luck, Min!" The redhead chuckled and caused for his face to heat further. It took thrice the normal time for them to reach the apartment and once that happened Jungkook tripped and they both fell on the ground, the man bursting into laughter. Their heads were resting on the carpet and the younger would have tried to get up if it wouldn't have been for the strong arms to wrap around him like their owner was a koala.

"Let's sleep here."

"Our backs would hurt in the morning." Jimin whispered back as if it was the best argument.

"I'll give you a backrub." That had him giggling so he scooted even closer and hid his face in the crook of the other's neck. "I'm so happy you're here." Gentle fingers began to run through cotton candy hair and a kiss followed them.

"Why?"

"Because I'm so smitten with you." Jungkook chuckled, his words causing another wave of giggles to come out of the other's mouth. "You're all I fucking think about, it's crazy." It was the first time the tattoo artist was speaking about his feelings so blatantly and Jimin couldn't get enough.

"What about me?" It was a shy encouragement.

"Some days I want to fuck you so good that you won't be able to walk." The younger's heartbeat increased in pace. "And other days I want to hold your hand and grant your every wish."

Jimin pulled away so their eyes could meet and he smiled sincerely before pressing his lips against chapped ones.

"I want you to be happy, you know? Not just when we're together, I want you to be happy all the time." It was the sweetest thing someone has ever told Jimin and he could feel himself getting emotional so he gulped and focused on the hand that was now rubbing circles onto his lower back. It was silly to cry while lying on your boyfriend's floor because of a drunken confession so he chuckled wetly at the idea and nuzzled the other's cheek.

"Thank you." His words came out a bit strangled so Jungkook hurried to lift his hand in order to cup his chin and tilt his head back.

"No, no, no." He hurried to whisper and leaned so he could kiss the soft eyelids in front of him. "My sweetest crybaby." He cooed and trailed butterfly kisses all over his right cheek. "Sometimes I'm afraid to touch you, 'm afraid I'll break you." Jimin felt so fragile that the thought of holding him sometimes overwhelmed him.

The pink-haired boy felt silly now for worrying about their relationship because Jungkook's feelings for him were just as strong as his. He still wanted to talk about everything, though.

"I've been worried for us." He mumbled and waited for the man to process his words, feeling dark eyes roaming all over his features. "It hasn't been the same."

"What do you mean?"

"We've been distant – We haven't even kissed properly." They haven't sleep in the same bed ever since that night when they made-up.

"I've been overthinking." Jungkook replied. "I don't want to screw up again, I want to become a better person for you." It felt like all the alcohol evaporated from his brain because the tone was now serious and Jimin knew the tattoo artist couldn't have been lying. "I'll kiss the hell out of you tomorrow, when I won't taste like whiskey and cigarettes."

"Okay." The student smiled widely and struggled to get up, offering his boyfriend a helping hand. "Let's go to bed now, I want tomorrow to come already." Jungkook chuckled and accepted the invitation, tugging the shoes out of his feet and throwing them in a corner before heading to the bedroom. A glass of water has been offered to him and he chugged it before undressing every piece of clothing but his underwear and tucking in between the covers.

He was still dizzy but he didn't want to sleep without the smaller body pressed against him so he waited until his arms were safely wrapped around it to close his eyes and murmur a "good night".

He was going to die – that was what he decided as soon as he dared to open his eyes, light flooding the room. He would have wanted to banish the concept of "daytime" but that was not in his power so he simply groaned and turned on his front, his brain shaking inside his skull and causing for everything around him to spin. He couldn't remember the last time he felt like that but it has been years so he suspected he needed at least a few hours to feel better.

He couldn't go back to sleep so he searched for Jimin's sleeping figure, disappointed when he realised the boy was nowhere to be found.

"Min?" His voice came out hoarse and his throat was somewhat sore. He was afraid his boyfriend left, scared by everything he confessed the previous night so he was ready to get up when the door of the bedroom opened slowly and a pink head peeked inside.

"I thought I've heard your voice." Jimin smiled but disappeared for a few seconds in order to come back with a glass of water and two pills he offered to the unwell. "Good morning!" Jungkook wrinkled his nose when his head began pounding harder.

"Is it?" He mumbled and took the medication before forcing himself to drink all the liquid, knowing it was the best for his body. The student giggled at the dramatic words and grimaces but gasped in surprise when he was pulled back onto the bed. "I want to spend the day like this."

"Don't you want to have breakfast?" A little hand began to run through dark silky strands. "There's a pile of pancakes waiting for us in the kitchen."

"Are you an angel?" A familiar giggle rang through the room and the tattoo artist couldn't help but smile.

"No. I'm a fairy, Daddy." He realised the name has slipped through his lips so he let out a small sound that betrayed his regret. He didn't want to allow himself to slip before they had the important talk he knew was going to follow sometime during that day. It wasn't that he didn't trust the elder, he just wanted to make himself 100% understood.

"A fairy, huh?" Jungkook might have sensed his discomfort because he didn't address the name. "Pancakes sprinkled with fairy dust sound the perfect way to start the day."

"Then let's go."

Jimin was dressed in one of his shirts that fell like a dress around his tiny frame and the man wondered if there was any possibility to have a pocket-sized version to carry around. He was simply adorable and he would have requested him to sit on his lap if he wouldn't have known they had meaningful things to talk about.

"Do you remember what you've told me last night?" The question came out shy and the tattoo artist looked at his baby as he struggled to spread Nutella all over his giant pancake.

"Of course I do. I meant every word." Jimin smiled widely, still focused on his task. "I'm sorry you've been worried, kitten."

"It's okay, it's better now that I know you've been doing the same." It meant they cared equally. "Little Jimin is still hurt, though, and I'm kind of tired because I can't –" He sighed and looked up so their eyes could meet. "I can't be myself and it's been so hard these past days." He's been awfully tired at uni and being concerned about his relationship just added to the whole equation.

Jungkook listened to him with characteristic patience and motioned for him to come closer once he was done. Their hands found each other.

"I shouldn't have lashed out at you when you were feeling little, I am sorry." Jimin has been in the most vulnerable state when he decided that yelling was the best idea, when he blamed him of ruining his image. He should have ordered his priorities well and he should have remembered that his baby boy always came first but he has been too angry to think straight. "But I've never been a Daddy before, Minnie. I've only been a Dom before and I have a lot of things to learn when it comes to our dynamics. I'm sorry I've hurt you."

"You acted as if it was all a show I was putting up and not my coping mechanism." And the cat has been let out of the bag – being taken care of was just as calming as self-harming so he didn't want the most important person in his life to take it lightly.

"Daddy's so sorry, baby." Jungkook whispered and watched as the boy flinched at the tone he was using. "I promise you I understand how important the headspace is for Minnie. Daddy's been such an asshat."

Jimin bit on his lower lip, his features betraying hesitation.

"I love you." The tattoo artist whispered and felt the other slowly pressing his body against his, accepting the comfort he was given. It was relieving to know his apologies were accepted so he let his lips press against a warm forehead, little hands fisting his shirt.

"I love you too."

"Let's go on a proper date this weekend." Jimin nodded and kissed the side of his neck.

"There's –" A small pause followed. "This book festival. I really want to go but it's okay if –"

"We're definitely going." Jungkook hurried to cut him off and cupped his face with both hands while grinning. "Do you have to go somewhere today?" His bunny grin was threatening to split his face in two when the boy on his lap shook his head. "Can I kiss you?"

"You can."

Jimin closed his eyes and felt his head being guided gently on its back, his whole body tingling with yearning. He was more nervous than he has been before his first kiss so the fact that his heart was going wild inside his chest wasn't surprising. He wondered if Jungkook felt the same but the questions vanished from his mind as soon as their mouths met and began gliding together slowly. It started sweet but passion and neediness took over and the student decided to part his lips as an invitation. They both tasted of pancakes and Jimin couldn't stop a little moan from escaping, even if his thoughts were positively pure. The kiss held all the reassurance in the world so once they parted they both smiled, short fingers finally letting go of the crumpled shirt.

"I've missed you." The tattoo artist whispered and hugged him tighter. "What do you want to do today?"

"Stay with you." It was such a simple and innocent answer that the elder just had to press another loving kiss to the pillowy and now slightly swollen lips.

"How about we watch Totoro?" It was an invitation for little Minnie so brown eyes widened in tender curiosity. "Maybe draw later?" He could feel happiness blooming inside his chest.

"I'd like that."

Notes:

Hewo! ٩(✿∂‿∂✿)۶ Thank you so much for reading ! I decided I should spoil you a bit so I posted an extra chapter this week! I hope you will enjoy it and look forward to what's to come next! Take care of yourself, darling! Have the loveliest weekend! x