Fallen Princess (2)

Our encounter became a regret since we cannot come back to the past.

Shui Jing

***

I can feel the pill's effect too strong but I have to fight. I don't want to surrender. I have to keep sober. I am scared to touch him because my body becomes hotter.

That old man brings me while opening the first door on the chamber, the white fog is surrounding us before the golden dust appears then in a few seconds magically we were arrived at another place. When the golden dust disappears , I can see the moon ray under the waterfall is so bright. I don't know this place but this place is so enchanting. Fireflies are accompanying us and make the darkness become more magnificent than scary. Sounds of waterfall like an alluring spell in my ears. I put my arms on his neck.

This dream is so beautiful. I know this is just a dream but I am satisfied because I can see Xue Chen. When I wake up. I will face the cruel reality and fight with my enemies. Can I survive passing this night?

"My husband, I don't want this dream to end soon." I kiss his wide shoulder lightly.

Xue Chen looked shocked, then put me down. Even this place is dimly lit at this our wedding night. Actually, I know this is just a dream but I want Xue Chen to consummate our marriage. Even though I know this is just a mirage, I still want to see him. I don't want to wake up because I know in reality Xue Chen had left me. His step is shambling. Xue Chen wants to leave me but I want him to be here so I grab his palm. I don't want him to walk away from me. My body needs him. I don't understand but I really need him now. My legs cannot support my body properly so I grab his neck to help me to stand in front of him.

"I am not your Xue Chen. Please leave me because I never know what is going on when that thing takes over me." He said with heavy breath.

"My husband, you must be tired right?" Tears are rolling down. "My husband, please don't treat me like this. This is our wedding night, right?"

"I am not your Xue Chen. Leave...me... now." His voice became irregular.

I know that evil woman forced him to swallow that pill as well. Perhaps he is still sober because of the pain from his wound on his chest. I don't know why there are golden rays from fireflies so bright tonight. I want to touch that wound but he takes a step backward like he was afraid.

"Don't touch me!" He shouted.

"My Husband, it's alright. I am here with you. I will never leave you." I said to calm him down but he looked more terrible.

I kiss him. I am so happy when he's kissing me back. This is our first kiss. Our kiss is like burning fire. I want to spend this night only with him. With Xue Chen. We feel the same fire burned us together. Even we began to get wet because we were walking on the river to calm our fire inside us but it seems useless. The cold water cannot suppress our lust. I touch his bare chest. He doesn't wear any fabric. I forget when or how I undress him but there is no wound on his chest anymore. My body becomes so tense because of his touches and kisses.

"My Husband, please help me. I cannot bear this anymore. I promise to love you with all my heart. I promise to be a good wife for you. I promise to be loyal and accompany you till the end of the world. Just don't leave me. I will never betray you. I promise." My voice became so desperate to want him to fulfill me. I just need him. Only him. The man in front of me. I kiss him again while I feel something penetrate on my cavity. There is pain when that thing tries to invade me because I never did it before.

"I am sorry." He said. His handsome face looks so worried.

"My husband, it's alright. I love you. I will be alright." I kissed him again while the great pain forced us to hug each other. Our body is still connected. I never know if this kind of pain exists. Like there is something tied our heart to become one. Something that makes me feel his sadness and misery.

"My husband. I will love you." I said again. I don't care about anything except him.

He doesn't say a single word because of the great pain. The pain comes from something in our vein. I can feel what he feels. This is our first time and I gave my body to my husband. I pat his back to relieve the pain even though I feel the same pain then the scene when in our wedding chamber makes me don't want him hurt again.

He kisses me and I kiss him back. I know that he wants to forget about his sorrowful life. Let this be a most beautiful dream. Let me fulfill my duty as his wife. I want my husband to be happy. Even the pain spread all over my body because this is my first time but it doesn't matter. He must know that he is my first. My only first. No one before him and no one can replace him in the future.

We are reaching the pleasure together. Until He spread his seed into my womb. My head is still blank, filled with pleasure and pain that make me hug him tightly. I don't understand why I want him more and more. Even I am so exhausted but inside my body really wants him to fulfill me with excitement.

"My Husband, help me." I want to cry because I am so desperate wanting him more but on the other side. This is so embarrassing since I am a woman. Will he think that I am so easy if I plead like this?

I think he will ignore me but he cups my jaw and kisses me again. He doesn't talk and just stares at me. He just let me do what I want. He doesn't complain. His seeds sprout in my womb again. Tonight is so beautiful and I think that I become a whore for my husband because I am the one who pleases him until my bushed body is laying on top of him. I am so exhausted and embarrassed.

"I am sorry because I can't hold myself." His voice is so gentle. He doesn't hug me. He doesn't hold me. He doesn't touch me.

"My Husband, did I do something that made you down?" I asked. The dimly lit make me unable to see his face plus my eyes still blurry.

"I hope you can forget your misery." He said.

"It's alright as long as you are here with me." I kiss his chest lightly.

"Please don't do that..." His voice becomes heavy and I can feel he wants me. I don't need his word to begin inserting his little brother into my flowers shamelessly even though I am so tired. "Listen...I am not your husband..." He said.

***