Chapter 4

It was the summer of 2016. Rahul and Simran had been fighting frequently. She wanted his time but his business and the household chores and the demands of her in laws were making the two grow apart. They would fight on petty issues like a wet towel. Rahul had the habit of throwing the wet towel on the bed. This irritated Simran to no bounds. She had become a cleanliness freak. Since she did everything with her own hands it angered her if anyone messed her house or didn't keep things back to the place where they belonged. Rahul was of the opinion that this was his home and he could throw anything anywhere. He liked his house messy. That is where an argument would begin and then it would turn into a fight. They would spend weeks not talking to each other and it was becoming a habit of Simran's to go to bed crying. Petty issues like Avi not getting good grades would be made major ones. Both of them were frustrated and Rahul had now made it a habit to say " leave me if you can't live with me" practically every day. They were hardly intimate and whatever little sex they had it was not passionate. It seemed to Simran that Rahul was taking revenge on her. Instead of making love it was more like he was raping her. He had started taunting her about her weight, her looks and every little thing. Slowly Simran was losing her confidence and thought herself unworthy of everything. She felt she was a failure in everything. A failed wife, a failed Mom, a failed daughter in law. The once sweet talking Simran was a bitter one now. One day Rahul's elder brother Raj who was noticing the change in Simran made her sit down with him and asked her what the problem was. Simran started to cry and told him how Rahul was not giving her time and never listened to her. Raj assured her that he would talk to Rahul and she need not worry. Everything would be fine. She should not overthink the situation. He suggested that since she was well educated why not take up a job now that Avi was big enough. Avi was in the tenth grade now and he had his board exams coming up. Simran thought it was a good opportunity to take up a job. After the board exams ended she would start teaching in his school. Simran talked to Rahul that night about her applying for a job. Rahul laughed at her first and when he saw her offended face he said "go ahead and try. The principal is looking for a librarian I will recommend your name." Simran talked to her in laws and they too agreed. The next day Rahul left for Delhi and a call from Avi's school came. They had asked her to come for an interview in the afternoon. Raj and his wife Esha agreed to accompany her to the school for the interview. Simran was nervous but she was determined to give her best. During the interview the principal, the vice principal and the manager of the school were seated in front of her. The principal asked her that she was a Bcom student what did she know about being a librarian. Simran confidently told them that she loved reading books and her favourite timepass was going to the library in London. She knew about the Dewy Decimal system and was well aware of the latest authors and books. There was another girl who had come to the interview who was a graduate in B Lib but when she was asked what content she had studied she was unable to answer and she couldn't speak English properly too. So Simran nailed the job. She was asked when she could join and she told them that she would join in the new session on May as she needed to go to London for a month.

Simran called up Rahul but as usual his phone was busy so she sent him a whats app message " interview cleared".

Raj and Esha were very happy for Simran and they took her out for a pizza treat and bought ladoos to treat everyone at home. Mr. Rai was happy and felt proud of Simran too. Avi was the only one who was sceptical. He was happy his mom had cleared the interview but a bit concerned that now Mom would be in the same school too.

At night Rahul called and congratulated Simran. He told her that the principal had told him before her call that she had been selected. He said good and taunted her " now you will know how hectic a job is. Now I will see if you have time for me or not"

Avi had hinted to Simran that Rahul had been texting a girl named Disha (who was his secretary) quite regularly. Disha was half his age and a good looking girl. Simran never interfered in Rahul's business but she was over possessive and jealous if any girl talked to Rahul. Most of the time Rahul and Simran had fought over this as Rahul thought that she spied on him and made up stories about his affairs with other girls. He would always say these girls are like kids in front of me. Are you mad! I talk to a hundred girls every day am I having a relationship with all of them?! Simran tried to ignore this but every now and then she would find something that would further confirm her doubts. Like once she found lipstick marks on his white handkerchief. When she asked Rahul he dismissed it as it was 'Sindoor' which the temple priest had put on his forehead and he had removed it because he had to go to office. His pass books showed that he had been spending online on dresses and shoes and bags but Simran never got those gifts. When she confronted him he said he had ordered it for her but returned them because the size was wrong. He went outside the house to receive calls. All giving rise to Simran's suspicions. He always slept with his back towards her.Now even Avi had confirmed it that Rahul had been sending messages to Disha.

A week after her interview Rahul was in office and Simran at home. Simran thought of sending a few emails to her friends. She took out her laptop and when she started it she found that Rahul's e-mail account was open and she found emails from Disha and Rahul. The mails were romantic and they were expressing their love for each other. In another mail Disha was angry and she was threatening to leave Rahul and told him that it was her biggest mistake that she slept with him and ever fell in love with him. All he was concerned was, of being with his family and he never had time for her. He was the biggest cheater and a liar on earth. Then there were also mails which Rahul had sent Disha of all the online shopping he had done for her. While reading the mails Simran started trembling with anger her eyes were stinging with the tears welling up inside them. She felt a rush of blood going up her head. She wanted to scream out. Break everything that she could lay her hands on. She was right and had always been so. She was not mad when she suspected that Rahul was having an extra marital affair. She took snapshots of all their emails and mailed it to both of them with the subject " cheaters have been caught ". Along with the attached mails she wrote both of them a mail : Your love affair has been caught. You can't deny it now. All this while you have made a fool of me. I am sick and disgusted to the core. I hate you both for betraying my trust. Fuck you both!!!

With a click of a button she sent the email and forwarded it to her Papa and Ekta.

She was seething with anger. She didn't know what to do. She couldn't breathe properly. How she wished she could vanish in thin air. She went to the bathroom turned on the shower and stood under the cold cold water and cried her heart out. How could he do this to her. Rahul called several times but Simran didn't pick up. She was in no mood to talk. At around 5 in the evening Rahul came home. And started " it's not what you think it is"

Simran was cooking dinner. Since the time she had found out she was seething with anger but did not give away her emotions lest anyone find out. She looked at him sternly. Her eyes blood shot. "Stop lying. You have been lying to me for the past 3 years Rahul. How could you. The day you appointed that bitch I warned you that you would fall for her. But you didn't listen to me. You always said I was wrong and that I was crazy. What have you to say now?" Her voice was growing louder with anger. Rahul's face was that of a thief who had been caught robbing. " I am sorry okay. I made a mistake. Iam not in a relationship anymore." "You fucking slept with her Rahul Rai!!" Screamed Simran. Her face red with rage. "No I never did. That's not true!"

"Then why would she write that it was my biggest mistake that I slept with you! What the hell does that mean!"

"Please lower your voice people will hear. My reputation is in your hands" begged Rahul with folded hands.

"Now you remember your reputation. Why did you forget it when you were sleeping with her. You did not once think that you had a wife and a sixteen year old son!" She felt her body trembling again and blood rushing up to her head. She switched off the gas and went to her bedroom. Rahul followed her and Avi saw them. He went and told his grandmother that Mom and dad were fighting. Simran sat on the bed and was crying inconsolably. Rahul kept on saying sorry and that it was not true. He tried lying again. Simran was in no mood. "I want that bitch out of your office today!!! Either she stays or I !! You have to choose now Rahul!" Screamed Simran. Mrs. Rai and Mr. Rai had come in now. They asked Rahul what was going on. They saw his flushed face. Rahul took them to another room and started saying that it was a misunderstanding. Simran was wrong in doubting that he had an extramarital affair. Simran heard what he was saying and came in with the laptop. She showed all the emails to Rahul's father and mom. Both of them were not educated in English and had a poor eyesight. So before they could say anything Rahul snatched the laptop and threw it on the floor hard. Simran was in rage now. She pounced on Rahul like an angry tigress and clutched at his collar. Rahul stronger than her pushed her hard and she fell wham on the floor and hit her left elbow . It all happened so suddenly that no one knew what to do. Rahul picked up his car keys and went away from the house. Avi ran and helped pick his mother up who was crying in pain. Raj and Esha had also come after they heard the loud noises. Mrs. Rai sat holding her head in her hands. She was utterly ashamed of her son. Mr.Rai went and got water to soothe Simran. She could hold the heartbreak no longer and she fell to the floor in a disheveled heap as her grief poured out in a flood. Esha picked her up and inspected her arm. She couldn't move it and the elbow had swollen up like a balloon. Avi told his uncle everything and his grandmother tried to hush him up but he was a big boy. "don't take papa's side dadi. He is wrong. He hurt mummy and you saw everything!" shouted the young boy in anger. Raj told his wife to get ready and told Simran that she needed to go to the hospital right away. It could be a fracture too. Without wasting time he took Simran to the hospital. All the way Simran was crying and there was a dead silence in the car. Simran was so angry that she wanted to go to the police station and file a complaint against Rahul for domestic violence. But then the face of Avi and her parents and in laws came in front of her. There was a month left for Avi's exams to end and she didn't want to trouble him. This was a crucial year for him.

At the hospital the doctor checked her arm and an X-ray was taken. They suspected a minor hairline fracture and put a caste on just for protection. The sobs had died but the anger and confusion were still there. When they came back home from the hospital it was late night. All this while Rahul had not even tried to contact her or find out what was going on. Simran didn't sleep in her bedroom that day. Rahul was already asleep and it agitated her even more. How could a person be so inconsiderate? How could he do this to her? She cried the whole night. Ekta called and she was very angry. Her father didn't know what to say. He felt betrayed. He couldn't believe it that the person who he trusted the most could betray his trust this way. Ekta wanted Simran to leave Rahul. Simran was in a dilemma what to do. She loved Rahul too much to leave him. She was used to her home. She was scared that if she left something might happen to her father in law after all he was a heart patient. Her own father was against divorces. Avi had his exams coming up. If she left he might fail. All these thoughts haunted her all night. She couldn't sleep partly due to the pain in her arm and partly due to the pain in her heart. She cursed Disha. How could she do something like this? She knew he was a married man and had a child. How could she?