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My Lord System : Incubus Lineage at start

Fantasy
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Synopsis

Edward was tricked by a demon and got misunderstood as a demon himself. His family and friends, all abandoned him but not the heavens. So, he reawaken his abilities and a new power up impose on it. He himself decided to become other Demon's worst nightmare by truly becoming one.

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Frost_Bite8 · Fantasy
Not enough ratings
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The Author's POV

The person whom the world revolves around. The person who defeats all of his opponents, and ultimately gets the beautiful girl. The sole existence all villains fear. That is the protagonist. What about me? As a failed author who had only one success throughout his whole career, I had reincarnated into my late novel. "This is it" I thought, as I tightly clenched my fist. Did I just get reincarnated in my own novel? Is this where I reincarnate in a novel and become the protagonist? No. Sadly it's not that kind of novel, as I reincarnated as a mob. The world doesn't revolve around me. The girls don't come flocking towards me. The cheat items don't come to me. "Phew" I let out a sigh of relief. "Thank god I'm not the protagonist" I joyfully shouted as tears streamed down my cheeks. Wait, are you curious as to why I don't want to be the protagonist? I did forget to mention the most important thing when I was describing a protagonist. That is... They are calamity magnets. I just died. If I learned something from that, it's that it really isn't a pleasant experience. If possible let me live a long stable life. Thank you, whoever reincarnated me. I would later come to regret these words... ======== Reader Disclaimer : Please read the *Read before reading novel* in synopsis. ======== Credit to _oinkchan for helping me find the previous novel cover Credit to Rengoku for his amazing edit of the new cover. ======== Discord : https://discord.gg/FNAKgfyky4 Patreon : https://www.patreon.com/TheAuthorPOV

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Demogorgon69xd
Demogorgon69xdLv1

I read the first 2 chapters but I introduced myself because this book just isn't for me but anyway you have a review of those first three chapters: These two chapters have potential, but they are bogged down by significant issues. The writing struggles with pacing—important moments are rushed, while unimportant details drag on. The dialogue often feels forced and unnatural, failing to convey the intended emotional weight. Edward’s despair is overexplained, making him come off as more whiny than tragic. In Chapter 2, the transformation sequence is overly detailed, robbing it of impact, and the introduction of the "Lord System" feels like an info dump rather than an organic part of the story. The plot lacks cohesion, and the characters’ motivations are either unclear or melodramatic, which weakens reader engagement. Despite these flaws, the foundation for an engaging story is there. The exile and redemption arc has timeless appeal, and the Lord System offers an intriguing framework for growth and world-building. You’ve created a protagonist whose suffering could resonate deeply—if handled with more subtlety. Focus on refining pacing and dialogue, and trust your readers to pick up on emotional cues without over-explaining. Simplifying the system’s introduction will allow the reader to uncover its mysteries alongside Edward, adding layers of suspense. Keep going—every draft is a step closer to creating something truly compelling. Anyway, for the author, don't take this review badly but as an example to improve, and I don't want to be too mean to the author so I'm giving it a 4⭐ and hope it gets better.

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