Dreams Can Be Super Scary

Like the flicker of a TV channel, I went from relaxing in a bed of tulips, freesia, and gardenia to being swallowed by darkness.

Thrown off by the sudden change, it took a moment for my mind to catch up and another for fear to slither up my spine; making the next breath desert my body.

As a little girl, I hated the dark but ever since that errant memory started haunting me five years ago, hatred had morphed into full-blown phobia. Caught in what was quickly becoming an anxiety attack, I almost missed the squeaking of a door opening and the quiet footsteps that followed.

I glanced up hoping to see Tianna, only to stiffen in trepidation as those same predatory eyes with blood red, slit-like, pupils from five years ago walked towards me. "No! No! No! This can't be happening" bounced around my mind.

Sheer terror wrapped around my limbs like vines holding me to the floor. I was desperate to leave and tried with all my might to move, but just couldn't. My eyes widened tearfully and my heart galloped a hundred beats a second while my breathing became shallower and shallower.

I was sure I was going to die but then something stirred inside me and that, now familiar, peculiar sensation of pins and needles coursed through me.

Waves of strength and determination crashed through my body and I instinctively knew that I could demolish anything in my way.

With that knowledge came a savage impulse to conquer everything in my path. Zeroing in on the eyes in front of me, I allowed instincts I had never used before but always knew was there to seep in and take over. I was like a sleeping animal that was waking up and finding her place in the kingdom. I was faster, and stronger.

Some disembodied pair of eyes wasn't going to stop me. A blood thirsty urge came over me while I waited for the steps to get close enough for me to pounce. Just a few more steps and all of this would be over. I would finally know…

There was a thud as I landed face first on the floor. Tears sprung to my eyes. I had been so close! Pushing myself up into a sitting position, I rubbed my smarting nose as I tried to recall the dream. All I remembered was the swell of power that made me feel unstoppable.

Like a flash flood rising from nowhere, the sounds in my room jumped to a billion decibels almost blowing out my eardrums. It was happening again! I could hear everything! The chime on the door of the bakery a few doors down from my apartment, the frightened yell of a mother telling a child to hold onto her hand, and the click, click, click of the traffic light as it changed colors.

It was as if I was standing outside instead of safely ensconced in my bedroom.

The noise increased with every passing second until I was weeping for relief.

Clasping my hands over my ears, I rolled around the floor. Somewhere in the recesses of my mind I gave thanks for thick carpeting as the pain reached an impossible crescendo. I screamed in agony. It pierced the air and reverberated through the room.

That was the last thing I remembered before sinking into the blissful quiet of darkness.

The next time I opened my eyes everything was back to normal, thankfully. As I shifted a bit, I realized that I was no longer on my bedroom floor instead the familiar earthy brown tones of my living room walls surrounded me. Someone had moved me to the couch.

Glancing around, I was thrilled to see Aria to my right. She was snoring quietly in a makeshift bed on the love seat. A smile drifted across my face at the peaceful look on hers. Then, I remembered what happened earlier and I was reminded that whatever was happening to me was accelerating.

I needed help and there were only two people I knew who could even remotely begin to help. I had been thinking about it since I got home last night but every time I did, I tried to bury it deep in my mind. Unbidden, a memory floated to the forefront of my mind.

The steely eyed doctor had once again used the hateful syringe that made my breathing painful. Somehow, I fought through the pain and ran off when he wasn't looking.

I hid in the janitor's closet for hours before my father found me. The look of fear in his eyes scared me as he grabbed and shook me silly.

"You can't run off Nicolette! Not now, not ever! You are one of a kind and we don't understand much about your body, yet. Without us, you could get sick and die. Do you understand? No more hiding or running away!"

As it turns out, he was right. Five years later, I find myself having no choice but to go home and hope that whatever was wrong with me hadn't reach a point where it was irreversible.