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Chapter 18 - Realigning Self-Worth

Two days after rescue, the infirmary's sterile air clung to Naia's skin as she sat up in her bed. She winced slightly at the lingering ache in all her muscles. The doctors had told her that they had locked up - along with most of the rest of her. She was glad that didn't include her heart.

Rather, that part… had instead come when she woke up. Poros had been resting in a chair in the room and told her something she hadn't wanted to hear. Evander hadn't visited once. Not her. However, he was said to have been seen leaving the ward that the woman she 'looked like' had been sent to.

She had smiled and thanked the man for staying with her, but she just felt hollow inside. Like she didn't even deserve to feel hurt. Theia was the one he'd visited and the one he was concerned about.

It seemed like he was done keeping his interest in check. Knowing that had made her desire to recover quickly a little less vibrant. The idea of returning to the squad wasn't pleasant.

The door to the private infirmary slid open with a soft hiss and revealed Commander Orfea's resolute figure. Naia straightened instinctively and forced herself to salute. The old woman eased her down with the voice carrying its usual authoritative tone.

"At ease, Navigator. How are you feeling?"

"Much better, Commander. I should be ready for duty soon."

Piercing indigo eyes studied her for a long moment before she pulled up a chair. She hadn't gotten to her position and survived the trials of being the first Navigator without noticing a lot of things in her time.

"I've reviewed the mission reports lately. Your performance this time as well was... exceptional."

"Thank you, ma'am. I was just doing my duty."

The direct praise was unexpected from the usually taciturn commander and it caught Naia off guard - but she answered quickly with a practiced professional humbleness. She was still a soldier in this war, even if her duties were more specialized than others. The commander leaned forward with her gaze intensifying.

"Your 'duty' saved the lives of your squad and contained a potentially catastrophic situation. It's fine not to let achievements get to your head, but they should be recognized."

The black haired woman nodded numbly. It was unusual to be dressed down over something that wasn't causing problems... so she rationalized that perhaps the older woman saw that kind of a thing as a problem. Either way, it wasn't like she entirely ignored what she accomplished. After all-

"Tell me, what did you notice about Operative Theia's gauntlets?"

Naia hesitated, surprised by the direct question. Especially since it was related to what she was just thinking about. For a flash there was also a consideration of protecting the information... but it wasn't as if it was something V/O shouldn't already know, right?

"They... there was a pattern. During our warp. A rhythm to the energy, almost like it was restricting something. It felt like our kind of powers."

Orfea nodded once powerfully. Then there was a flicker of approval in her eyes.

"Astute observation. Not many would have noticed, let alone understood the implications. Moreover... using it successfully in that sort of time frame."

Emboldened by the First Navigator's approval, Naia ventured to ask something she hadn't understood.

"Is that why you asked me to watch her?"

"Partly. Our abilities make us uniquely suited to monitor potential... instabilities with this Operative. But it's your intuition and your ability to harmonize not just with energy - but the people and situations, that truly sets you apart. You've come a long way, Naia."

The woman felt warmth spreading in her chest. There was a greater pride filling her than before the old soldier came in. She may have had no real choice but to join Vanguard Operations because of her ability... but she hadn't experienced such a strong sense of *belonging* in quite some time.

"I... thank you, Commander."

Orfea stood, her posture softening imperceptibly. But the emotion inside was still a little clear to the younger woman. Just like it was the other way around.

"The Vanguard needs people like you. Not just for your powers, but for your insight. Remember that."

As the commander turned to leave, Naia found her voice again. While she hadn't wanted to hear what Poros told her, there was a detail about it that he hadn't covered.

"Commander? What about Theia? Is she...?"

Orfea paused at the door, but didn't look back. The older woman's shoulders stiffened back to her usual tension and her voice was more strained.

"Operative Theia is... a complex medical problem. But thanks to your actions, she's stable. You did well, Navigator. Very well indeed."

The door closed behind the silvering haired woman's exit. It left Naia alone with her thoughts. For the first time in weeks, she felt a sense of purpose. One that had nothing to do with Evander or their relationship. She was valued, not just as a Navigator, but as herself. As Naia - with powers on top.

"Thank you, Commander."

She whispered softly in repeat, despite knowing she would never hear. Yet she didn't mind. She felt it was important to acknowledge the respect and recognition she'd been given. She'd earned it. And she would continue to do so.

The realization settled over her like a warm blanket. There was more to her than just being Evander's partner or even just a Harmony Navigator. She could have a unique role to play, one that only she could fulfill. At least that's what the commander's words seemed to imply.

As she lay back in her bed, Naia found herself looking forward to returning to her squad. The future would be filled with a newfound sense of confidence. Whatever challenges lay ahead, whatever happened with Evander and Theia - she *knew* now that she had the strength to face them on her own terms.

That night, Naia slept better than she had in months.

Well good for you, Naia, really. More self worth is always nice.

Now if only it wasn't 'whatever happens' and was instead 'what you want to happen'...

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