When Good Plans go Awry

I don't own star wars

I was in the kitchen with Yura enjoying breakfast, reading… well mostly nonsense on the holo-net. Republic commando's touting a victory over some pirate group. Imperial propaganda about liberating several prisoner camps. A hutt passed away under 'mysterious circumstances', which was always the case when it concerned a hutt. A new environmentally safe chemical plant opening up on a forest moon called Kiror in republic space…

My foot absently stroked Onara's fur as she blissfully moaned under my petting. Yura finishing her breakfast looked up as Xalbaia entered, glaring at her dog for a moment she approached Yura. "Yura… Here." She politely and carefully handed Yura her blaster, "You left this in the bathroom… did you know the scope doesn't work?"

Yura rolled his eyes but nodded, "Yeah I know. I was going to have Short-round check it out later…" she holstered the blaster at her side and eyed the doctor. "Was there something else?"

Xalbaia glared at me, frowning thoughtfully. "…Do you actually do anything around here? I've been on this ship for a week and the last three days we've been procrastinating on tattooine. And before that we were running around Nar Shaddaa for scrap."

I shrugged, still reading the holo-net, "We just haven't taken any jobs… you've got us covered for a while after all."

"Don't just mooch off of me!" She shouted angrily, glaring daggers at Onara, "And you!" Onara blinked up at her master, "Don't just roll over and-" she stood stunned as Onara immediately rolled over and let me rub her belly with my foot, "…You are going to get it Onara. Regardless, take a job Aiden."

"She has a point…" Yura noted, although she sounded a little annoyed that she had to admit it. "We haven't taken an actual job in a while. Just that uh…" she caught herself, it wouldn't do to let Xalbaia know we were on 'friendly' terms with Watcher Zero, "Babysitting job and now this long-term one with her. We need to get back into the game, and catch some bail jumpers. Take out some raiders…"

"How about some pirates?" Scarlet said suddenly, entering the kitchen and waving her republic com, slipping it into her pocket. "I've got word from Shadow Wave that some low-class pirates just raided a republic arms factory. Took out a couple of guards and snatched an awful lot of weapons, word is they're going to sell them to a buyer. I was going to pass but I think we can arrange a payday if we take them out." She slid the com to the center of the table and it displayed what look like a large frigate and several weequays and groms.

"…That's a pretty big ship for just us…" I said hesitantly but frowned as several pieces of information began to display. "…at least thirty men?"

"Yeah but you've handled that. Remember the Knives of the Republic? You must have killed nearly that much on the Aggressor, and these guys don't even have the standard Militia training…" Scarlet said, showing up a display of a one-eyed weequay wearing a thick black bandana covering his missing eye. "This is their captain Bavalo Col, he's not really a tactician but he is pretty brutal."

"On the Aggressor we had Short-round's jury-rig powersuit." I noted, "How are we going to handle a ship full of pirates who could blast us out of the void?"

Yura sighed, "…He's right. It'll be far too hard to raid a frigate like that with just us."

Scarlet shrugged, it was just a thought on something to do she didn't expect much of it. However, before she could turn the display off Xalbaia slapped her hand and pointed to the far back of the frigate. "I know these models… they have a blind spot flaw." She gestured to the engines, "If we take out the engine first…" she traced her finger, slowly under the ship. "And made our way down beneath it we can attach ourselves to the airlocks here…" she circled the port side of the ship, "And hit them before they even knew we had docked." She looked at us, "The halls are narrow, you Baleen and Scarlet will be more than enough to hold them back… Yura and Milky can provide support."

We stared at her like she was crazy, but she shrugged. "When you live a long life like my species you make hobbies. I wanted to be a ship engineer before I became a doctor."

"O-kay…" Yura noted softly, still staring at her before leaning over the table. "…She's not wrong I supposed. Where were they last seen?" Yura asked Scarlet.

"The very edge of hutt and republic space. Probably looking for a nice black marketer to sell it all off." She stoked her lekku thoughtfully, "I'll send word to keep a lookout." She said taking the display, "You better call the others back to the ship. Milky's out shopping and I'm not sure where Baleen is."

"Well, she's not on the ship…" Xalbaia said scowling at me as she showed the shock bracelet, "Or this thing would be going off." We all stood in silence, thoroughly expecting fate to be provoked but were pleasantly surprised/ annoyingly disappointed in the result. "…Seriously take the damn remote back." She hissed at me, "Why did you give it to her in the first place?!"

"She doesn't ask for much." I said shrugging, giving Onara one last rub before getting to my feet. "But I guess I'll relieve her of it for a while."

"I wouldn't care if she didn't use it every damn time I spoke to her! I guess it's just that imperial in her showing…"

I sighed, "Or her intense hatred of drug dealers, who can say." I began walking out of the kitchen, "I'm going to go find Milky and bring her back, Yura give Baleen a call we'll head out as soon as possible."

"I'll make arrangements with the republic." Scarlet said rather sheepishly, "For at least some payment for this… it's not an actual contract yet."

Feeling the suns of tattooine on my face I headed towards the market looking for Milky. Unfortunately, she was apparently not there, they had seen her though; luckily, she was a regular. She apparently had entered one of Torga's bars for a quick drink. I entered myself to find her surrounded by 'fans', peppering her with drinks.

"Alright alright that's enough…" I said, interrupting their fun as Milky giggled in a drunken haze. I turned to the bartender, who knew me. "Cut them off." He nodded, being in Torga's good graces gave me a bit of leverage.

"The lady is having a good time…" a particularly drunk rodian began, shoving me aggressively as I glared at him. Apparently, he didn't know who I was. "Let her drink."

I breathed very slowly through my nose at the man, it seemed like a very stupid reason to shoot somebody over this. "Buddy, I need to take my girlfriend and g-" I hesitated as he pulled a vibroknife on me. That reminds me I need to have Short-round make me a new one… actually… "Oh you've done it now…"

Milky, giggling like a schoolgirl turned to look at me, "Aiden! Hey these guys-" but she stopped, seeing the rodian holding a vibro-knife on me. And her eyes quickly focused, and an intense look of rage crossed her features. With a primal scream that shook the bar she was on the rodian, and certainly not in the way he was hoping for when he got her drunk. Suddenly the other guys weren't so keen on 'having a good time.' With her.

"DO NOT PULL A KNIFE ON MY AIDEN!!!" she shrieked like an angry wookiee, pummeling the rodian as I picked up is vibro-knife. I did need a new one. I caught her arm, stopping her from killing the poor idiot.

"Sweetie. Milky…" I said calmly, dragging her off the bleeding rodian, "Come on we need to go home now."

"No… he pulled a knife on you." She mumbled blearily, stumbling as I dragged her to the entrance, the other patrons parting before us.

"Yeah and I'm okay." I said, putting the knife carefully into my boot and lifting her bridal style and carrying her on. "Thank you for saving me…" I said playfully as she lied her head on my shoulder, smiling blissfully as I carried her into the suns.

"Do I get a reward?" she mumbled blearily as I head back to the ship.

"Not shitfaced drunk Milky." I replied, "I really don't like drunk sex."

I met Baleen outside the ship, she was carrying the groceries. Apparently, she and Milky had switched tasks. "What happened to her?" she asked, gesturing to the sleeping Milky.

"Some idiots got her drunk." I replied, "Didn't work out for them… I got a new knife!" I smiled shaking my boot and drawing attention to the vibro-knife.

"Practical." She noted, following me up the ship ramp.

"Oh and I need the shock remote back you're abusing it." I noted absently.

"Not so practical." She scowled angrily at me, but slipped her hand into her pocket and pulled out the remote. She pushed it, smiling as Xalbaia's screamed on the ship.

"GOD DAMN IT BALEEN!!!" she shrieked after a moment, apparently recovering after another shock. She was recovering quicker.

Getting Milky to bed I snatched the remote back from her, slipping it into my pocket. "Short-round!" I shouted and waited. The ship didn't have vents so I didn't expect him to just pop up. After a moment he walked around the corner leading to his workshop. "Yeah boss?"

"Can you make me a holster for this?" I asked, handing him my new knife.

"Sure boss." He said flatly, dexterously spinning the knife expertly in his hand, "…Want me to balance it? It's kinda a piece of crap…"

"Whatever you want Short-round. I'm sure whatever you do to it will be an improvement." I noted as his mind seemed to whirl with ideas as he wandered away. I clapped my hands, "Alright is everyone ready?" of course I was only addressing Baleen and Yura who were watching me looking confused.

"…What are we doing?" Baleen asked, packing away supplies.

"Pirates!" I smiled, "We're going to steal back some weapons!"

"Okay…" she said slowly, turning to Yura. "Are we being paid for this?"

Yura shrugged absently, "Don't know yet. Might as well wait until Scarlet finishes talking to her superiors."

I dropped onto the couch, frowning as Onara made her way into the kitchen and bounded towards me, evidently excited about my return. Quickly ruffling her fur I smiled at her, I always wanted a dog. "Well… yeah I guess it needs to be an actual job before we take it huh?" Soon Scarlet entered looking less than pleased, "…I guess it didn't go well?"

She waved off the question with her hand, "Well they want a return on the weapons. Or they want to know who the pirates are selling them too. They're not going to pay us, and by that, I mean you, to take them out… they could do that themselves."

"Well… then we obviously don't blow up the ship…" I said slowly, thinking on the matter, "But also who do they intend to sell too?" I began pacing, thinking on what to do.

"Take the ship, and sell the guns." Scarlet said suddenly, absently searching her pockets and pulling out a small device, "Then we find their buyer, sell them the weapons and follow them back to their hideout." She shrugged, "Done it dozens of times really."

"Oh well I'm glad it's so simple." I mumbled, scratching my head. "…Okay then… you Baleen and I are the raiding party. And we'll need to take one of them alive to figure out where the meet up is. The trick however is getting them to talk."

"Oh, I can handle that…" Xalbaia said, suddenly from the doorway, reaching into a pouch at her waist and showing off a small white colored cartridge for her injector, "One touch and they'll answer any question we ask."

"Great!" I said, "Now that we've got that all worked out. Let's head out."

"Right because I'm sure Milky will recover in time." Yura noted with a smile, heading towards the cockpit. "Maybe you should try and sober her up…" she added teasingly.

Well, we didn't have much else to do as we made our way through hutt space. So, ignoring the angry looks Baleen and Xalbaia threw each other and a snoring Onara I made my way to Milky and Yura's shared room only to find no Milky. Briefly, I considered she was vomiting in the bathroom, but I found he swirling in my sheets, blissfully enjoying herself like a cat on catnip.

"Having fun?" I asked, she smiled up at me, her head hanging over the edge of the bed. And slowly, invitingly, she opened her mouth. Her tongue lolled slowly out of her mouth.

"Ahh…" she cooed erotically, and my pants suddenly became much tighter.

"Milky I don't like drunk sex…" I said feebly, but as her tongue slowly lapped away at my hardened erection I couldn't help but think that she made a convincing argument. With her teeth she expertly lowered my zipper, releasing my erection to the room as she gasped happily. Opening her mouth wide she slowly pulling my erection into her mouth with her tongue and I found myself thrusting forward slowly into her throat. Visibly watching it bulge as I pushed deep into it, feeling her moan and purr around me.

Even drunk and not entirely in her focused mindset she was warm, wet and embracing. Her tongue lapped happily at whatever she could, slurping and sucking me deeper and deeper as if desperate to pull my seed from my balls with pure vacuum suction and she was succeeding. I slowly pulled away, but like the very vacuum of space, I found myself going back in. my hand wrapping around her throat and actually feeling my dick stretch her as she swallow my length.

I felt my urges however taking over, I wanted to thrust. Gripping her breasts roughly and slammed deep into her. If she had any objections she didn't vocalize it, she just purred lovingly accepting my sudden urge to use her throat like it was her pussy. To be fair it wasn't the first time…

Gripping her breasts tightly I slammed as deep as I could go, and fired. Her hands, wrapped around me, squeezing my butt and pulling me forward, deeper, moaning her devotion as I filled her… I finished, and I slowly slipped from her mouth. She lovingly licked my length, giving it a quick kiss as she finished and grinned up at me again before rolling lazily up in my blankets and prominently snoring, quickly falling asleep.

For half a second I felt quite used. But I got over it, I kissed her forehead and she purred in slumber on my bed and went elsewhere to occupy my time. Shutting off the lights to my room as I left.

I'd like to say we found the ship instantly. But we didn't. it took us several hours and several calls to Scarlet's superiors, but we finally found the damn thing…

I slipped into one of the turrets, grinning as they quickly booted up as Scarlet's voice rose over the ship's com as her turrets booted up as well. "You know I've never actually fired one of these before!"

"Well don't get cocky… aim for the engines." She said, "We'll fire together on the count of three. One. Two…"

We opened fired on the engines. 8 blaster rounds peppered into the back of the ship and the slow glow of its thrusts quickly died away. With a sudden jerk, we flew under the ship itself, the massive frigate looming over us. The Rebel slowly turned, exposing our airlock to the ships and with amazing piloting skills we attached to it.

"Think they know we're here?" I asked, leaping out of the seat and brandishing my rifle as Baleen slapped on her helmet and hefted her repeating rifle.

Short-round sitting at the navigation computer blinked calmly at the screens as we were armored and armed up. One hand was holding up a radar dish to the ceiling of the ship, it connected by a cord to a pair of headphones on his head.. "…Well the captain's not happy. He's really laying into the engineers… he thinks the engines have blown again. They don't know we're here…"

I stared at her confused for a moment, "…How?" I asked, utterly bewildered at his statement.

"Well, remember when you told me to make something to find bugs on the ship?" he asked practically, still listening on the headphones. "Well I just re-purposed it a little…"

I raised my hands in a sort of reluctant acceptance, sometimes it was best to just not ask Short-round as we made our way to the airlock. "Okay. We'll be back in a moment…" Short-round followed us, pulling out his odd little portable display, and with some quick high-tech sorcery, he hacked the lock… and in we went.

Narrow corridors are the bane of any boarding combat. Especially when it's an ambush… half a minute after we began moving through the ship we encountered pirates and they were not ready for us. They tried drawing their blasters but Scarlet and I made quick work of them as we moved throughout the ship. We found the cafeteria, and Baleen's repeater quickly cleaned up. I almost felt bad for them but then Scarlet reminded me or their crimes (not just the most recent) and I didn't feel so bad.

Bavalo Col was actually the real problem. First off, he was well and truly aware of our presence after we practically slaughtered most of the crew. Second, he was a much better shot, actually clipping Baleen's heavily armored shoulder before we finally got him. We're not exactly sure who got the final shot, Scarlet or Me, but we were fairly sure that it wasn't Baleen. She was sweeping up the last of the crew.

"Shit did we leave anyone alive?" I asked hesitantly, examining the many smoking bodies. "We were supposed to leave one alive!"

Baleen kicked a few bodies and shrugged apologetically, "There was a lot of blaster fire… I sort of lost track of that part." She was not wrong, and it wasn't fair, but frankly, we were about to lose a payday.

Scarlet shoved Bavalo Col's corpse out of the way, quickly running through what she could on the navigational computers. "…They were heading… to an orbiting station. Hanger number 5" She said, scowling at the display and slamming her hand on the console as it fizzled and popped, "Maybe. We should have Short-round check this out."

I slapped Baleen's shoulder leading her into the ship, "Call him. Baleen and I will look for the goods." It certainly didn't take us long to find them. Guns, drugs, some very nice silks... these pirates had a heck of a haul.

"There's more than blasters here…" Baleen noted, examining a republic carbine warily before putting it back into the crate it was stored in. "Looks like these guys dealt in everything." She kicked a set of unused shackles and chains, before dropping her hand on a bolt of cyrene silk. "…Should we take more than the blasters? Can we?" she added easily lifting the bolt of silk in one hand.

"Well…" I noted, picking up a fairly decent piece of pottery, probably made by a gungan judging from the designs on it. "It would be a shame to let it all got to waste. But there's no way we can take everything…" thinking on it for a moment I decided to call up my money girl. "Hey Yura how's your appraising?"

Apparently pretty awful. Xalbaia however was more than happy to tell Baleen what to, and what not to, take. Occasionally after every return trip for the next crate Baleen would absently slip her hand into her pocket, searching in vain for Xalbaia's taser remote. Finally, after taking what we could and Short-round scrubbing through the computers we left the ship. Leaving a small present from Short-round behind. Once we were far enough away we activated the trigger, the frigate fell apart as Short-rounds remote bombs went off in surgical locations.

"Okay let's finish up!" I said, opening one of the crates and holding out my hand. "Short-round give me the tracker please…"

"What makes you think I have one?" he asked surprised, looking away from the ship explosion in the distance to glance curiously at me.

"Because you always have whatever it is I'm asking for?" I replied a little sheepish.

"I didn't know about a tracker." He said flatly with a shrug that seemed both apologetic and dismissive "I can't prepare for everything." I gaped at him, he always had what we needed. He had a freaking shock collar for Xalbaia prepped and ready and he doesn't have a tracker?"

Scarlet, rolling her eyes, absently tossed one of her own into the crate. "Knock it off you two…" then glaring at me and making me flinch she added, "He's made a radar, fixed up your vibro-knife, scanned the ship for bugs with a handmade device and fixed Yura's scope."

"I did?" he said seemingly unsure himself. To be fair he sometimes had no idea what he was doing himself sometimes.

"He did." Scarlet nodded and shoved my shoulder, "Now come on the meeting point awaits. The faster we get there the faster we get paid."

The orbital station was owned by a mining company. Set to orbit some small rich mineral planet just outside of official hutt space. Landing in hanger five, which was remarkably empty we began to unload the blaster crates, three in total filled with thirty blasters each. Baleen sat on the crate watching the doors as she checked her watch as Scarlet and I paced. Just in case, Yura was on one of the turrents.

"So how do we know they're going to buy from us? Maybe they only made a deal with Bavalo…" Baleen asked, suddenly deciding that now was the best time to point out a flaw.

I shrugged, "Well… I don't know. Hopefully, they won't care who gives them the blasters as long as they get them." Then I heard the hanger doors leading further into the station open and seven indistinguishable men entered, I grinned politely at them but then the world began to slow down as I recognized the leading man.

Blonde, blue-eyed, and a burn mark on his face. His eyes met mine and we knew instinctively that we recognized each other. It was Cipher 3, my bitch of a mother's personal Cipher Agent. The plan immediately went out the airlock as we both reached for our blasters simultaneously. He moved. I didn't… and like an tattooine western we drew our blaster pistols

A blaster bolt whizzed by my face, I felt the heat of the round toast my cheek slightly as he dodged my blaster fire. The man behind him wasn't so lucky, he took the round in the face and fell backward, and all hell promptly broke loose.

Scarlet and Baleen to their credit adapted quickly. Taking cover behind the weapons crates Scarlet drew her pistol and opened fire. Taking out another guard before it fully registered in his mind as to what was going on. Baleen took a little more time. Revving up her repeating rifle she immediately began suppressing the other guards before they could act.

"What the fuck happened to the plan AIDEN!!?" Scarlet roared at me, helping Baleen in keeping the enemies' heads down.

"Kill the blonde!" I roared at her, seriously, "He's a Cipher Agent!"

Immediately understanding why I started firing, she cracked open the side of the crate and pulled out another rifle for extra fire. But the enemy became bolder, forcing our heads down as they moved to better positions. Cipher 3's blaster fire came dangerously closer to its mark. Barely missing Baleen as she ducked down.

Then they realized something they briefly ignored. The Rebel. Suddenly heavy ship fire from the ship's turrets utterly destroyed one of them with a horrific scream. Practically disintegrated him as they began to fall back.

I give this to the Cipher Agent he also adapted quickly… a small spherical device suddenly arched overhead… right at Baleen. I shot my grapnel into the floor behind her and was pulled forward, tripping her up and making her fall as the detonator bounced just short of the front of the metal crate. Blasting a huge chunk of it and the weapons apart as Cipher 3 dashed out of the hanger with his surviving men, almost immediately vanishing in a trickle of light "Shit!" I hissed, brushing away dust and other unidentified particles as they floated down around me. "You alright?" I said, looking down at my feet at Baleen.

"A fucking thermal detonator? What a dick." She grumbled annoyed, pushing gently off me as she glared at the hanger doors, then she slapped me. "What happened to the plan dumbass!?"

I waved her off, scowling at the destroyed crate of weapons and wondering if the republic will pay for a mostly returned fee… "…He was a Cipher Agent. My bitch of a mother's personal one…" Scarlet scowled at the news, her mind already whirling.

"…Why would Imperials want republic weaponry? Why would your mother?" she mumbled, a look of extreme pondering on her face.

"My bitch of a mother."

Baleen slapped me on the chest with the back of her hand. I was wearing armor, but it still hurt. "Shut up Aiden."

I sighed, shaking my head angrily, "…I don't know… First a fancy new prototype ship, then paying pirates for republic weapons? Who knows what the hell she's thinking…"

"…Well…" Scarlet began slowly, apparently playing with an idea as Baleen began lifting the crates of weapons onto trolleys to get them back on the ship. (she was strong but not that strong) "…Maybe some sort of infiltration?"

"Your guess is as good as mine. But I'm starting to think it was a good idea she didn't get these." I frowned at the hanger doors where Cipher 3 made his escape. "…But it might be a problem that she knows it was me that stopped her from getting them."

"What the fuck happened to the plan Aiden!?" Yura shouted from the ramp, skipping aside as Baleen hauled the crates onto the ship. "They were supposed to take the blasters!"

I sighed. I really didn't want to deal with this again, so I passed the torch. "Scarlet you tell her…" I mumbled. "I need a nap. Let's get the shit back to the republic. Absently stripping my armor as I made my way to my room, I stared a little confused at the fact that Milky was still there. Blissfully snoozing as Onara curled up on the floor nearby. I Shrugged, crawled into bed, wrapped my arms around Milky and promptly found myself off to sleep.

End of Chapter.

Bonus Scene

"Curse that miserable bastard!" roared Altora Kane, "Damn him! Damn his father! And Damn HIM!"

"Altora… calm down." Came the rather soothing, calm voice of Toxitus. "It's inconsequential…"

"Apologies ma'am…" Said the gruff tones of Cipher 3, sounding legitimately disappointed in himself. "He has the luck of the devil."

"It's not your fault. That little bastard has always had something looking out for him." Altora replied, evidently calming down.

The entire room was silent for a moment, then came an odd tapping. Then more silence. "…We have to move on." Toxitus said. "…The ship is lost. We have been denied the blasters… we simply need to try again, another plan."

"I want…" Altora said slowly, "That little bastard..." The tone began to climb, "GONE TOXITUS." She hissed coldly. "I should have strangled him in his cradle and blamed it on a pillow!"

There was a brief awkward silence but Toxitus spoke once again, "Yes. At any rate, I'm afraid Mr. Kane is simply out of our reach right now. Normally I'd tell you to hire someone to remove him but as its stands, your supply of credits is… currently restrained-"

"Heh heh…" Secret account suddenly not such a good idea is it Altora?

"-It will look significantly worse for you if Imperial credits kept vanishing because of your disowned son, intentional or otherwise." declared Toxitus, who didn't hear my laughter. It was a one way receiver after all. Straight to me.

"Damn it." Altora hissed bitterly.

"Until your audit has been aimed elsewhere we're just going to have to deal with Aiden some other time." Toxitus finished practically, "Until then I suggest we try idea number three… the Imperial hero."

I focused on that. What were they talking about?

The room was silent for a very long time, and for a moment I thought I had lost the signal… but then.

"…Cipher 3. See that it's done." She said with utter finality

"Of course, ma'am." He said obediently, and I could almost hear him salute over the com.

"And… why don't you join him my dear?" Toxitus said pleasantly. And then came the odd tapping again. I definitely needed to get video in there, but audio was hard enough. "If our track record is any indication Mr. Kane will be present. You can… say… hello." He put particular emphasis on the word 'say'. And his statement was soon followed by odd, angry, tapping… I'm not even sure how they did that.

"Kashyyyk my dear." He said pleasantly to some unspoken question. "And don't be so crass."

Kashyyyk… why would they be going to?...

"Oh, fuck me." I said annoyed, and quite frankly shocked as I realized why immediately.

"Right now, sir?" Haley asked surprised, standing beside me.

"What?! No… sorry, Haley." I said shaking my head, nervously tapping my face. "…Just something Aiden says… speaking of which." I pulled up the com; very, very serious. "…I need to call him right now."

End of Bonus