Chapter 229 - Ethical Dilemma
I realized I was at a crossroads when they dragged me out of the trial room.
My eyes roamed over the three judges and Shirai, sitting on the far right.
My throat was dry yet the poisonous words were on the brink of my lips, ready to spill and intoxicate everyone.
I could force them to let me out.
I could tell them that if they didn't, I would erase Japan from the world's map.
I could do it.
I should do it.
They wouldn't believe me.
I'd have to show them.
And once I did, there would be no coming back.
Killing was no sacred act, yet I was no mindless killer.
I accepted the fact that one day – in my next life – I would pay for what I'd done here.
Yet murdering innocent people – moms and dads and brothers and sisters and children and babies – was a whole other kind of crime.
Crossing this line would make me the monster they said I was.
The line to cross was right in front of my feet, licking the tip of my shoes like the sea licks sand beach, taunting then leaving, taunting then leaving.
The most disturbing was that as the judgment – life sentence – was still ringing in my ears, I considered doing it.
There would be no more point in deluding myself into thinking I was better than I truly was.
If I did it, I would be the most evil man to have ever been born.
If I did it, it would mean my soul was as rotten as I'd always feared it was.
They dragged me across the room and I let them do it, dazed.
My eyes went from one judge to the next.
Can I do it ?
I'd destroy the whole country before Jin Woo could blink.
Dad wouldn't look me in the eye for a while, but he'd come around – he always did.
There was nothing he wouldn't forgive me.
Grandma would be happy to have us both in Italia.
Katsuki would hate me for the rest of his life.
But the true question was : could I live with myself if I murdered millions of people ?
They opened the door and shoved me roughly out. It shut loudly.
I had not been able to make up my mind in time.
And in a sense, I think it was worse.
"Shoto !"
Hands grabbed my shoulders and squeezed.
Red, worried eyes under frowning eyebrows were set on mine.
"Your father's taking care of everything"
A bolt of lightning jolted me awake.
"Get your hands off the prisoner !"
The warders roughly shoved Katsuki away, and Katsuki, scowling, pushed them back.
Soldiers on either side of the corridor went to restrain Katsuki : one of them put his gun at a blank point on his temple.
Katsuki raised his hands in surrender, yet his eyes were still set on mine.
"Stay calm, alright ? Do not try to-"
He cut himself before saying it, though I knew what he
They were dragging me farther and farther away.
"We'll get you out in no time"
I was craning my neck to look behind me and over the wardens' heads.
"Tell him I'm okay, alright ? Tell him not to worry !"
We turned around a corner, and Katsuki strained his neck on the left as he tried to keep me as long as he could in his line of vision.
"We'll get you-"
The door shut closed.
*
"I want you to absolute Shoto"
"No"
Shirai's response had been sharp, leaving no room for argument.
Enji, sprawled out in his chair like a king, cold eyes locked on Shirai's, had no outward reaction.
Shirai leaned forward.
"The only reason we are here today is because your friend trapped me"
Gun Hee would've smiled in normal circumstances, yet he couldn't bring himself to.
"You said I could ask for anything", said Enji. "You said you would grant any of my wishes"
"Any wish in the realm of possibility"
"I want him out"
"He should be dead, Endeavor. Dead. Had the Peace Symbol been anyone but his friend, that's what would've happened"
Shirai stood up.
"Do you know why I didn't order to shoot them both dead ?"
Enji's eyes were the coolest they'd ever been.
"If I did, All Might's kid would've sided with your son, and our country would've had a far, far greater problem on its hands than All for One ever was"
Shirai's eyes were shining with barely contained anger.
"Your son is a monster in the making. If we don't stop him now, there will come a day when no one can"
Shirai walked to the door.
"I'm not going to stop there"
Despite being of utmost calm, Enji's voice echoed like a bomb's blast in the empty room.
Shirai's hand brushed the handle: he paused for a moment, considering.
Then he left.
Enji leaned forward and picked up a cup of tea.
"Proud of yourself ?"
Gun Hee's tone was bitter.
"I indeed am", Enji replied coolly.
The tea was sweet yet slightly bitter.
He drank slowly, appreciating all of the aromas.
Gun Hee's eyes were locked on his peaceful face : irritation was building up in his chest.
"You know that what he's done would've gotten anyone else executed right at Tartarus's doorstep-"
"I do"
"- then why are you acting as if you're right ?"
The way Enji had been acting since he'd learned about what happened was baffling.
It was as if he had a one-track mind and couldn't be bothered by what had warranted this imprisonment.
"Seeing your sick son put in a shoe box without being able to say goodbye tends to make a father forget what's wrong and right"
Gun Hee clicked his tongue.
"Don't act as if he had cancer", he said disapprovingly. "He was a murderer"
The lack of reaction irritated Gun Hee even more.
"And he got what he deserved"
The air turned hot and dry.
Enji calmly put down his cup.
"Careful here"
"Or what ? You'll hit me ?"
Enji's eyes were steely.
Gun Hee shook his head, exasperated.
"Do you even know why each of your demands to see your son has been refused ?"
"I am no longer a Hero but just a regular civilian"
He wished he could claim his Heroic persona just to see his son again.
Gun Hee shook his head.
"It's because we all know that if you and your son are in the same room, chances are you'll blow up a fucking volcano on us and flee"
Enji nonchalantly rubbed his cheek.
He'd shaved this morning yet he felt as if the very air around him was rotten, as if no matter how thoroughly he cleaned himself he wouldn't be able to wash away the weeks spent in his bed.
"I am no criminal"
"Yet you're still trying to get your son out despite the gravity of what he's done"
"Don't tell me you wouldn't do the same thing in my position"
"I wouldn't"
Enji did not bother replying.
Gun Hee had no children. He couldn't understand.
"He's sixteen", Enji said. "I won't let my child spend his life in prison"
Gun Hee blew up.
"That's because he's sixteen that it's worse !"
His face was red, and spit had flown from his mouth at his sudden outburst, covering his lower lip and his beard.
"That's because he's sixteen that you should've raised the fuck out of him better !"
He dried his mouth with the back of his arm, eyes shining.
"He went to Tartarus – Tartarus, Enji – on a whim !"
Enji opened his mouth, but Gun Hee would have none of it :
"And do not try telling me he just wanted to see Hawks : you don't believe it yourself"
"… he wasn't rescuing anybody", argued Enji. "He was doing it for a Hero"
Gun Hee clasped his hands on his head, squeezing hard to let out some of his pent-up anger.
He wanted to rip his hair out in frustration and choke Enji simultaneously.
"For God's sake Enji, we've put people in this prison ourselves. You better than anyone else know that the people on this island shouldn't get out"
Especially not someone who'd murdered in cold blood the Commission's President.
The public didn't know about it : for them, Hawks had been injured weeks ago when All for One had hit and wasn't in better shape yet.
"He's a kid", insisted Enji, as if it explained everything
Gun Hee was seething.
"You should've raised him better precisely because he's a kid ! Don't you ever stop and wonder what would've happened if you'd taught him right from wrong ?"
Enji's eyes darkened.
He stood up, and Gun Hee did too, and they were so close it looked as if they were going to fight.
"Do not question the way I've raised my child"
"Let's say we get him out of jail", Gun Hee said. "Then what ? For how long will he stay calm and nice ? What will he do next ? Who will he threaten ? How many people will he hurt to get what he wants?"
"He killed no-"
"That's not about killing !", cut him off Gun Hee. "That's about boundaries. Your kid doesn't understand there are things he can't do. What if he decides someone has wronged him ? What if he feels like the Prime Minister isn't good enough and he could do a better job ?"
The idea was absurd and Enji snorted.
"He would never-"
"How ?
"What ?"
"How can you be sure he won't do it ?"
Enji opened his mouth but Gun Hee cut him :
"You're his father and yet he didn't even bother to inform you about it : how can you expect us to trust him ?"
Gun Hee shook his head.
"Your kid is a goddamn ticking bomb. He's too much of a threat to be left to his own devices. Sorry Enji but no friendship is worth protecting a terrorist"
He looked sorry.
"You're alone in this"
Gun hee grabbed his coat.
Enji's contacts were all slowly abandoning him, and that was without considering the fact that he was no longer a Hero.
His political influence was decreasing, and there were so many people he could bribe or blackmail.
"If you think what they did is justified, then why did you agree with helping me ?"
Gun Hee sighed.
"If you want the truth, it's because I'm worried about you"
"I'm doing fine"
"Is 'doing fine' the reason why you're cashing in every favor you've ever been owed ?"
Enji shot him a glance.
"Don't look at me like that. Even if Shirai hasn't mentioned it, I am aware that both the Prime Minister and the Ministry of Defense half-heartedly tried to coerce him into freeing your son"
"Did they ? I was not aware"
"Listen, Enji. If I'm even bothering to talk to you it's because we were close friends at some point. Do not try to fight against us : the decision has been made, and you know that it is deserved. Forcing people to choose sides in your little war against Shirai is not going to end well"
"I am not forcing anyone to do anything"
"You are forcing me to pick a side"
Gun Hee was conflicted between old loyalty and his duty as a soldier.
"And I'm sorry to say it, but I can't pick yours"
He grabbed his suitcase, leveling his gaze with Enji's.
"I brought Shirai here only in regard to our common past. Consider any favors I owed you as repaid"
He left.
Enji stood for a while, looking at Tokyo through one of its tallest skyscrapers.
Today he'd lost an old friend.
Enji sat back down and helped himself with some freshly baked biscuits.
The two other glasses had been left empty and untouched.
He ate slowly, his churning mind already crafting his next move.
He hadn't expected this discussion to lead to anything, but he'd still wanted to try.
Enji was like a horse with blinkers ; his mind was a one-track one , focused on one specific goal, no matter that the life he'd built for himself was falling apart to succeed.
He'd given them a chance : now he wouldn't have an ounce of guilt about what he'd do next.
*
A/N :
Gosh I'm so excited for us to get to the end of Part 2.
It's gonna be in-sane.
Check the sorry's P@treon, Nar_cisseENG, if you want to support us on our last run.
And see you in the next update everyone !