With Him Too?

"Do you hate me now?" Mu Yuze whispered, his voice oh so soft and vulnerable. 

When He Juan looked at him like this, he seemed to see the shadow of Mu Yuze's past self. Not the mature, confident and capable man, but a child who was still fraught in anxiety. A child who was afraid to be left all alone. 

And that sight was akin to a hard blow on his head, sending his mind reeling in shock. What had he done? Seven years ago, he had left while convincing himself again and again that Mu Yuze would surely recover from this, that he would forget He Juan as he grew older, that this would be nothing more than a short bitter episode in his life. 

But the cruel facts before him now told him otherwise. 

Mu Yuze's pain, his fear, his grievance— none of it had changed since then. His feelings had not lessened even one bit.

It was not only He Juan who was still stuck in the past, unable to move forward. But Mu Yuze too.