This made my brain hurt. I mean is it as bad as the harem/ OP nonsense that seems to just be a constant on this app, no. However, it really needs some work down to its core to be read without cringing.
I am sorry that I couldn't write it well enough to not hurt your brain. It is my first novel, and it is going to be really long. Thank you for the criticism, also, thank you for reading it nonetheless.