Scarface3699

so u skipped it...so we don't know what our MC looks like, barebones relation to Newgate, and u skip the fight to establish the way he fights and how he compares. Cool good move

your story isn't structured well at all. The writing is fine but it's messy in that there's cool elements but we get no insight into what's happening 30 chapters in. Like why are we dealing with paladins and the MC's calamity form this early in the story. Even though the fights are cool (Captain faux and sebas especially) it's such an abrupt jump in powerscaling when the main character was figuring out and getting his first core just chapters earlier.

the solar reserves thing is actually pretty annoying. Instead of stamina (an attribute that can steadily rise and be trained to last longer )u have this arbitrary battery no other Kryptonian actually has that makes hims so much weaker than reasonable for Superman's son.

wait metallos core doesn't kill him I'm pretty damn sure. Since everytime that's been take out it's not killed him.Or he would be a reoccurring villain

Shit the general himself

ur English is good 👍

shit you kinda cooked with the tyrant dream sequence then this line. I hope this continiues👍good job

did he get younger to his teens or is he still as old as his old world??

oh what does he look like? his face

too descriptive as in I just get the core idea of what u try to describe in the first sentence or two before i skip to the next paragraph or more. But then again i have read and seen TOG so idk if that's a symptom of that more than ur writing.