Trojan_HeartVirus

I couldn't get past the first chapter, it gave me a headache. The narrative is very poor and illogical, as if the author were patching up the same piece over and over again in a frustrated attempt to camouflage a huge hole with poorly made seams. Not to mention that the dialogues are pure garbage juice. I think that if a story starts out full of inconsistencies like this, the best thing to do is not to create expectations that it will improve over time, we all know that it won't.

Who speaks qualitatively in a conversation? Did the character come from China? I'm feeling vibes of that right now.

It's really bad, I'm trying to read this, but I can't. I know it's a translation, but it still sounds like RAW. The story has a lazy narrative where everything is told directly and nothing is shown to us, the dialogues are weird. Not to mention that if Laila was replaced by a male character, it wouldn't make any difference.

But the new thing about this fanfic is that the MC is an old bastard, there are a zillion copies of fanfics with normal MC out there.

Okay, I don't like Maria at all. She's so... troubled and unseasoned. I can't find any quality that makes her interesting and it's quite irritating that she's a source of problems every time she appears on the scene. Maybe I'm being too partial to her, I know she's still young, but Ricky is more than twice her age, maybe even triple her age and he's being led by the nose by a little girl who's just been weaned. I can't imagine Ricky being so patient and affectionate with an immature, basic girl who can barely choose a side of the coin, especially since he doesn't seem like a good guy. I wonder what is so fascinating about her that a lively guy like him would be so obsessed with her and please don't tell me it's because of her purity. Furthermore, for someone who was born into a mafia family, she doesn't have the slightest bit of decorum and is a bit autistic, in families like that, it's full of strict rules and women are obviously created for future alliances, anyway, she should at least have a little social intelligence to at least understand that interfering in other people's fights is stupid.

Seriously, I'm very impressed, although Ricky is quite annoying, he has a high chance of having the best and most well-done character design development on this site, the secondary characters also manage to bring that feeling of reality, although I believe that their descriptions are a little too shallow and direct, which breaks my immersion and makes me have some difficulty materializing and remembering what they should look like physically. The lemons are also very good, but I think to avoid getting repetitive in the future you could skip some scenes with partners who already had Ricky's babies.

OK, Alaine is disgusting. .

TFC

Disappointing, I expected more. Why do most HP fanfics, where the MC is clearly supposed to be a villain, not act like a villain but like an anti-hero? The author repeatedly tries to compare him with the two dark wizards and give an image that Lucas is better, more cruel, colder and more intelligent than Voldemort and Grindelwald, but in my opinion he is nothing more than a clown who is looking for a stage to appear on. . After all, both Grindelwald and Voldemort don't know that their world is fictional and neither has a system that rewards them for any reason, but Lucas does and he's not in a totally different league than the two. They talk so much about his genius, but it is only seen off-screen, because at no point did I read about the MC acting in a genius way, he just steals Harry's opportunities and acts like a casanova dandi. The author changed Hermione's personality, she became a vase and doesn't seem intelligent or charismatic at all, she acts like a mini fan just like all the other girls at Hogwarts, the author doesn't even try to be subtle that they will become Harry's harem. MC. I also don't understand this Chinese obsession with elven lineage, as long as it's a fantasy setting they will insert this trope. What bothered me the most was that even though the MC swore he was a villain, we didn't see his evil things being done first hand, you could say he killed his enemies but in a witch war scenario who wouldn't?