Tsukasa_
Expect slow updates from me. I value the content quality more.
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Tsukasa_3 years agotrả lời AethericKatPerhaps it was. I am still not a very good writer, you see. But still, I’ll take this comment into consideration. Thanks very much[img=recommend]
Chương này đã bị xóa- Tsukasa_3 years agocông bố
Decent writing and story concept. Though I would've preferred it to be a tad more descriptive. Overall, it's good. I don't notice any grammatical errors. And the story's pretty good.
- Tsukasa_3 years agobình luận
I'll be giving this a review tomorrow :P
- Tsukasa_3 years agobình luận
Ooh, nice
- Tsukasa_3 years agocông bố
Well, the story's quite interesting. Perhaps a bit too fast-paced but it's all good. Dialogues, though; unrealistic, too detailed, and unnatural. Dialogues can interrupt the story's flow. I suggest you improve in that field.
- Tsukasa_3 years agobình luận
Unless it's intentional, you're making your main lead sound a tad narcissistic.
- Tsukasa_3 years agobình luận
Here's a tip on writing, don't be too detailed ._. For instance, your character had just eaten. He said, "Ah, finally. That was some great, juicy meat!" It's low-key creepy and unrealistic, y'know? Don't just straight up say "Ten instant noodles". Instead write, "Maybe I ate too much instant noodles..." or the such.
- Tsukasa_3 years agocông bố
The story's good and all but I sometimes have a hard time envisioning the scenes. One of the main points of writing is imagery. If anything, it's the author's only problem. At some point in the story, I realized you can't handle making your readers feel the tension of a certain scene. I suggest being more descriptive, not too much as that'll be a bit creepy considering this is a first-person point of view.
- Tsukasa_4 years agocông bố
The story's pretty interesting. The plot is graspable. But the writing could be better. I noticed a few grammatical mistakes that can be easily be fixed by sheer editing. This novel indeed has potential. I shall await your improvement.
