WinterTimeCrime

The MC does get a female lover.

Sure is!

I'm glad you enjoyed it! 😊

Thanks!

Yeah, it is a bit tricky to understand. But think of it as 'just a way's from here,' or 'it's over yonder.' It doesn't really give a specific distance or time relative to the location. :)

Depending on where a person's head is cut, their severed throat may tighten causing the victim (if they haven't died from shock) to produce a choked spasm from any blood, mucus, or other fluids stuck in the lungs or throat. :D

I like the narrative, very interesting conversations, and lots of unique dialogue. I laughed at the scene in Ch. 17 when he said he couldn't understand women, and oh boy, sometimes I do not. 🤣 Nice job, keep writing!

Nice start with an interesting premise. I like how the story gave a few small indents from the author themselves, truly made me enjoy the story even more. Keep it up!

The dialogue has a decent flow and the use of hyphens instead of quotations marks was an interesting way to read, the first I've seen. World-building and character design can use some work, I couldn't visualize any settings nor conversations being had in the first few lines which are crucial to captivating a reader. Despite the needed touching-up, it's a decent read.

The story had a decent flow, and the dialogue was believable. POV made all of the situations Anastasia gets into. A few of your first chapters have some grammatical errors and typos, but those can be easily fixed in the proofreading process. Another point, using identifiers like 'said' and 'asked' can get a bit bland and repetitive; I suggest pairing a character's voice with a specific action, how they look, tone, etc. Keep writing, all the best.