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Ray_Dark

Ray_Dark

Lv1
2019-12-02 đã tham giaIndia
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Bài viết

0.7h

đang đọc

24

Đọc sách

Huy hiệu

4

Khoảnh khắc

3
  • Ray_Dark
    Ray_Dark3yr
     công bố

    nice and thrilling roman with horror, it's thrilling to at author have good potential, I think she can do a far better job just keep up the good work.

    The DEVIL'S darling
    Kỳ huyễn · Misumi
    detail
  • Ray_Dark
    Ray_Dark3yr
    bình luận

    it's a good story the horror and thrilled in the first paragraph, jut little grammar mistakes like in the first line "I hated the color red because it was a color that hunters my dreams" this is going in the past tense like she hates red color in the past, not in the present, it should be more like this. "I hate red because it's a color that hunters my dreams" and the other line should be like this "then my eyes drifters around I found my best friend Tara's body nailed on the wall or rather what left of her"

    Đoạn này đã bị xóa
    The DEVIL'S darling
    Kỳ huyễn · Misumi
    detail
  • Ray_Dark
    Ray_Dark3yr
     công bố

    Intrusting, Guy name Leo reincarnate in another world with wings after his death, good story people should read it, not the best but it's good, Author is immature but has potential in time I think he can grow and write even better.

    Video Game
    Kỳ huyễn · tired123
    detail