Is This the End?

"The poison is progressing. It is a lot faster than we had originally thought. The first antidote only slowed down the progress."

I heard murmuring as I realized I had actually passed out from the pain. The doctor's voice felt like it was near me, but I could only keep my eyes closed. No, it was more like I could not move at all.

Is this how I was going to die? It felt almost anticlimactic. Killed by my own poison. I had thought that I would be taken down in the towers, but it seemed this time it would be by my own hand. The noises gradually drew farther away as my consciousness slipped into sleep once more.

"Doctor, I got the antidote!"

Who was disturbing my sleep again? Was that Mat? Strange. Didn't he leave with Callie earlier? Whatever, I am so tired.

There was that beeping noise again. Why is it so loud? It was a lot more annoying than the first time too. The beeping faded into a loud blaring noise and I felt a shock pass through my chest.

Wait? Am I actually dying? I was just kidding before. You can beep all you want. I don't want to die again! I am going to survive this time damnit!

Beep.

I don't know how long I stayed in that state of darkness, but suddenly I was aware of my surroundings again. From what I could tell behind my eyelids it was dark in this room. I didn't hear any beeping and that felt like a bad sign.

Cautiously, I opened my eyes. It wasn't complete darkness as the light from the screen beside my bed cast some light in the room. Instead of the wall of windows at the end of my room it seemed I was in a different room this time.

My throat felt dry, but in the semi-darkness I couldn't see much around me. I reached out with my hand and tried to feel around on the bed for a table. To my surprise my hand fell upon a peron's arm.

Was there somewhere there? Why would their arm be laying next to me? I hesitantly patted around for more information. My arms were weak though so I managed to find out that they were large arms.

Only one person I could think of had a physique like this. That meant the person next to me must be Mat. That fuzzy dream I had must have been me hearing the world around me.

A million thoughts filled my mind. How had Mat found the antidote and did I actually die briefly? Why did Mat come back?

I knew the answer to the last one. It was simple if I thought about it. Mat had fallen in love with me. He had probably rushed over to Clay and demanded he make an antidote or something.

Mat was resourceful like that. He was definitely too smart for me to fool him. I almost always ended up telling him the truth. It wouldn't surprise me if he marched into the white room and demanded answers from that mysterious person behind the screen.

Only, he had reported that he could only enter the white room when I was with him. It was an odd thing. If the white room were an achievement the system handed out then wouldn't they be able to enter after entering with me?

If that were not the case then the white room must signify something else entirely. A condition I was not aware of. For that matter, did anyone else have a white room? Or was I the only one? 

As I was lost in my thoughts my hand was grabbed by Mat's warm hand. I must have woken him up by patting him. I heard a sniffle from the chair beside me.

Though it was dark and we could not see each other's faces, I looked away. Yes, I knew this pain very clearly. I had felt it once as my mother had laid on her deathbed. The doctor's had managed to save her one last time. I remembered how terrified I was back then.

Now I had caused the same pain for Mat. I wish I could erase those feelings for him. The feelings of affection he felt for me would only hinder me in the end. However, I could not bring myself to reject him completely. So I sat quietly as he sobbed next to me, pretending I did not hear anything.

Soon the sounds came to a stop and I felt his grip on my hand loosen and I knew that he had fallen asleep. However, I was gritting my teeth as hot tears threatened to fall from the corners of my eyes.

First it was Callie and now Mat. All I seemed to do was make people cry for me in the end. I was not strong enough to keep myself out of the hospital or even to fight against that mysterious man behind the screen.

I wanted to yell and scream, but the reality of my illness had stuck me firmly in bed in this weakened state. Even with this so-called recovery skill I was still weak and stuck in this hospital bed unable to do anything.

What would it take to gain true strength so that no one had to cry over me and the threat of death pushed far away? Had I not suffered enough in these two lifetimes?

I would treat this setback as if my life had been lost once again and build anew. In order to be strong I would need to push myself to my very limits. Fortunately, each time I entered the towers I felt stronger than before.

Even now I could feel my body pulling itself back together as my recovery skill activated over and over again. I looked at the darkened squares of the ceiling in defiance. Today the tower had undoubtedly killed me, but I still had survived, somehow.

I let my emotions run wild with my new party members, but I would become stronger because of this experience. The first thing I needed to do was rest, so that my body had a chance at recovery.

The next morning I was greeted with even more tears from Callie as she exploded into my hospital room. It seemed that my night of almost dying had been explained to her and she looked angrily in Mat's direction.

"If you knew how to save her, then why didn't you allow me to help!"

"There was no time and you were in no shape to help her."

"But… but!"

Callie collapsed in a heap as she tried to brush away the fresh tears falling down her face.

"Really? I feel like the one who should be crying here."

"Kai, that isn't funny!"

"I never said it was. Look at you. Clean up that pretty face. Mat will see what you actually look like."

"I don't care!"

"Are you sure you are an adult?"

"Don't be mean!"

"Okay, okay. Why don't you fetch me some ice chips and you can clean up your face on the way?"

"Mmm'kay."

Callie sniffled once more before leaving the room. I sighed and resettled back into my bed. Consoling Callie had made me forget that I still had some broken ribs. They ached terribly under the tight bandages.

"Are you in pain?"

Mat was instantly by my side moving his hands in jerking movements, trying to decide how best to help me. Here was an entirely different person to console. Wasn't I the patient?

"I am fine, so long as I don't move. Honestly, who just barges into a hospital room and collapses on the floor in tears? How could I not tease her?"

Mat laughed and settled back into the chair he had slept in last night. I briefly wondered how he was not grumbling about the uncomfortable position.

"Thank you."

"Huh?"

"I said thank you. You know, for the antidote. I heard what you did."

"Think nothing of it."

I looked away and I felt heat rise in my cheeks. Why did my face have to do such embarrassing things when I didn't want them too?

"Please don't go into towers alone anymore. I will drop whatever I am doing if it happens again. Wait for me next time."

"I am not some damsel in distress that needs you to drop everything to come save me."

"I know that. Still… Just contact me, okay?"

His eyes pleaded with me and I could not refuse him.

"Only if I can contact you. If I can, I will."

His hand enveloped my own once more and he had a stupid grin on his face. It felt like I had agreed to more than just contacting him to go in the dungeon with me, but I let it slide because Callie came back with a bucket full of ice chips and the brightest smile.

"I got you ice chips Kai. Do you want me to feed them to you?"

"I can feed myself."

"No fair! How do you expect to feed yourself with that broken wrist?"

"Obviously, with my other hand."

I attempted to yank my hand out of Mat's, but his grip tightened on mine. I had a bad feeling about this.

"Oh, no. It looks like I need to feed them to you. Open wide! Ah…"

This must be their way of punishing me for going into the tower alone. I reluctantly opened my mouth and let Callie feed me the ice chips. I was definitely going to pay them back for this later.