29. Chapter 29

I think this is my new favorite chapter-peep the quick note at the end please and thanks!

Trigger Warning for mentions Child Abuse.

Erin jerked awake and snapped open her eyes, glancing rapidly around the room to see where she was. She relaxed slightly when she recognized the soft curtains that covered the window and the silhouette of Camille's lamp, remembering that she, Jay and Kate were staying in Hank's house while their apartment was a crime scene. Her head was dully aching, but what had woken her up was the small body beside her. Kate normally slept peacefully when she was in her parent's bed, but the little girl appeared to be trapped in a nightmare, struggling against the comforter and emitting plaintive whimpers every so often. "Kate, baby." Erin gently rested a hand on her baby's shoulder, "Wake up, sweetheart, it was just a dream."

Kate's eyes bolted open as she scrambled against the sheets, looking around quickly at the room around her. There were faded posters on the wall and the window was shaking slightly from the wind. "We're at Grandpa Hank's house, in my old bedroom," Erin sat up, trying to comfort her terrified daughter, "We're safe, we're okay."

"Daddy." Kate erupted into sobs, "Where's Daddy?"

"He's in the other room, he's alright," Erin tucked Kate's hair behind her ears, the little girl still shaking, "You're here with me, it was just a dream."

"I'm sorry," Kate wept, covering her face with her little hands, "I'm sorry."

"It's okay, you just had a nightmare baby." Erin shifted closer to her little girl, "It's perfectly alright for you to be upset."

"I'm sorry for being scared," Kate whimpered, fresh tears joining those that had already made their way down her flushed cheeks, "I-I-I'm tryin' to be b-brave."

"I know, sweetheart." Erin wrapped her arms around her quivering child, "I know, it's okay to be scared too. It was a pretty frightening day, huh?"

"I want Daddy to be here." The little girl burst into another round of sobs, "He c-can't be alone, he can't!"

"He's just down the hall, sleeping," Erin assured her, "He's safe in bed, you don't need to worry about him."

"No, no," Kate sobbed, "We gotta get him, bad things are gonna happen if we're not with him. You g-guys need to be 'gether, you're partners or they gonna hurt him like they hurt you!" With that, Kate dissolved into painful sobs, ripping Erin's heart from her chest.

"Oh sweetheart," Erin held her baby close to her chest, "I'm okay, I promise," She opened her mouth to continue, but a soft knock came at the bedroom door. Jay quietly stepped into the bedroom, wood floors creaking as he moved. He hadn't been able to stay asleep and had been woken up by his daughter's cries that penetrated the old walls. He padded across the floor, Kate's sharp pants punctuating the still air.

"I couldn't sleep without my girls," he whispered, sinking down on the bed beside Erin. He ran a hand over her hair, mussed from sleep.

"D-daddy," Kate sniffled, lifting her head off of Erin's shoulder, "You safe." She sounded incredibly relieved and exhaled deeply.

"I'm safe, Squirt." Jay nodded, kissing the top of Erin's head, "Can I snuggle for a bit?"

"Uh-huh." The little child relaxed immediately against Erin's chest as she scooted over to make room for Jay on the small full-sized bed. It was barely big enough for Kate and Erin, and adding Jay proved to be a tight squeeze. "C-can I give Daddy a hug?" Kate asked softly as he shifted closer to his girls.

"Of course, baby." Erin smiled sadly at her boyfriend and let him take the still-shaking child into his embrace. "See, Daddy's okay."

"I'm glad," Kate breathed, cuddling closer to her father, "I get worried when you don't got Mommy for back-up."

Jay and Erin exchanged glances at Kate's statement. "I know today was scary, kiddo, but Mommy and I can't be together all the time." Jay kissed the top of his precious little girl's head.

"But you're partners," Kate emphasized, "Mr. P could have killed Mommy and then I would have no mommy." She began to get more worked up, "And-and last time Daddy got his head split and Mr. P is a bad, bad man and I don't want him to hurt you."

Erin squeezed her eyes shut, willing the tears to abate. "Kate, baby, Daddy and I work with the Police. Sometimes it can get a bit dangerous and sometimes we get hurt, like when Daddy got hit in the head. And even though we're partners, we can't be together all the time." She looked to Jay to continue, unsure of what she could really say next, as she had been the one to get bashed over the head and wind up unconscious on the living room floor.

"What Mr. P did to Mommy wasn't something that we expected. We go home at different times all the time, and nothing bad ever happens, right?" Jay looked to his little girl, who still appeared very unconvinced, "But Mr. P is a very bad man, which is why we're going to get him and make sure he never hurts anyone, ever again." He paused to run his hand over the top of Kate's head, "And we're going to keep you safe. And Grandpa Hank has a whole bunch of people keeping Mommy and me safe too, so you don't need to worry about us."

The child relaxed slightly, glancing worriedly up at Erin. "Did-did he hurt you?"

"I have a bump on my head and a concussion, but I'll be okay really soon, I promise." Erin smiled, wiping a few tears off Kate's cheeks, "You and I get to hang out together for a few days though, how does that sound? We can color and play games."

"I know he hit you on the head," Kate said softly, glancing down at her hands, "Did he touch you?"

Erin felt as if she had been stabbed in the stomach. She shook her head furiously, placing a gentle hand on Jay's back to ground him. "No, no, baby. He didn't." Tears filled her eyes and the question she wanted to ask was on the tip of her tongue, but she didn't have the heart to ask it.

"D-did he touch you?" Jay asked after a moment. He looked sadly at his unbelievably innocent and sweet little girl, swallowing thickly and trying to keep himself from storming out of the room to go kill the bastard.

He felt as if the wind had been knocked out of him as he watched his daughter nod slowly, still looking shamefully at her hands. "N-not in New York," Kate informed them, eyes cast downward, "But before you got me, Mr. P used to hurt me real bad. And he let other guys do it too." She drew in a breath and looked up at her parents, "I-I'm sorry I didn't tell you. I don't like 'memberin' it."

"Oh, my love." Erin wrapped her arms around her daughter, leaning into Jay's chest, "I am so sorry that happened to you."

"You're safe now, Squirt," Jay managed, quickly blinking to rid his eyes of tears as to not upset his already traumatized child, "I am so proud of you for telling us because I know how hard it can be to remember horrible things."

She nodded and closed her eyes briefly. "Is it okay if I would like to be done talkin' 'bout it? For now?"

"Of course." Jay kissed the top of her head and then the top of Erin's, "How about we all get some sleep, hm?"

"C-can you stay?" Kate asked. Jay and Erin exchanged glances, the little girl having read Erin's mind. There was nothing she wanted more than to snuggle up to her boyfriend and daughter in her real childhood bedroom. She widened her eyes hopefully, knowing that Jay wouldn't be able to say no to both of his girls.

"I can." Jay whispered, "But this is a secret because Grandpa Hank can't know."

Kate smiled and nodded knowingly, "Cause he don't like funny business."

Erin clapped a hand over her mouth to keep herself from bursting out laughing, "Who told you about funny business?"

She shrugged, settling against her father as he laid back in bed, entirely amused by his brilliant daughter. "Woo-zek. When I told him sometimes we cuddle, he said I stop all funny business."

Jay chuckled softly, pulling Erin closer to him. She nestled against his chest and stroked her little girl's hair back, "We gotta make sure he's not ruining your innocence," she mumbled, closing her eyes. Jay had left Kate resting directly on his chest, which helped keep him warm but also allowed Erin mold to her boyfriend's side.

"I love you," he whispered, running a hand through his girl's hair, "Sleep well babe." He gently stroked Kate's back, who was already dozing lightly, "And I love you too, Squirt."

The following morning, Hank pretended not to see Jay emerge from Erin's room sheepishly and the duo headed for the district bright and early to locate Jackson. Peter Jackson had been less than helpful with providing his brother's whereabouts, only repeatedly exercising his fifth amendment right and smiling smugly. Once Crowley had gotten wind of the situation with Paul Jackson, she had allowed Intelligence to take over the case but insisted on overseeing everything. Her major caveat was that neither Hank nor Jay would be allowed into the interrogation room.

"We should put him in the cage," Jay growled, glaring out of the window in Hank's office, arms folded tightly across his chest, "I wouldn't even need two minutes."

"I know kid," Hank nodded in agreement, "But the 14th let him get ahold of a lawyer and there is no way that bastard leaves his side." He was referring to the defense attorney Jackson had picked out, who was none other than Ed Bowler. Bowler, the same man who defended Joseph Pierce and traumatized Kate, was on the top of Jay's list of people he'd like to get in the cage as well, right after Jackson and his associates.

"He's just as bad," Jay exploded, "The man is defending criminals. He's gotta know something."

"Bowler isn't the man being charged with possession of child pornography with intent to distribute," The seasoned officer pinched the bridge between his eyes, "But he may be getting paid by someone who knows where Paul Jackson is."

Jay unfolded his arms and turned to leave before he felt a hand on his back. "You can't, Halstead. You're too close to this."

"I'm just going to talk to the guy who is tossing money at that fucking lowlife," Jay exclaimed, refolding his arms, "I'm not arresting anybody. I'm not going to hurt him."

"Can't take the chance." Crowley knocked on the office door, which was half open already, "Sorry for interrupting, but an undercover in the gang unit said that one of his guys had spoken with Jackson, looking to move a large amount of heroin. Might check into that?"

Hank nodded, "Jay, take a half day. Go home and be with Erin and Kate. There's a patrol car out front and covert behind the house but I'm sure they'd love to see you."

Jay narrowed his eyes, knowing full well that his sergeant was just trying to get rid of him. However, going to check on his girls was probably the best and only reason that would make want to take a break. He sighed and nodded, "Yeah, I'm worried about that concussion."

"You and me both, kid." Hank clapped his detective on the back and pointed to the exit.

"Daddy!" Kate exclaimed, rushing toward her father and jumping into his open arms, "You safe!" She hugged him tightly, not bothered by the snow that dusted his jacket.

"I'm safe, Squirt." Jay kissed the top of her head and leaned back so he could take in his little girl, "What have you been up to? And what are you wearing?"

Kate giggled, "Me and Mommy sleeped and had breakfast and then I put Mommy down for a nap," she told him seriously, "And we forgot to bring pajama shirts, so I'm wearing one of Mommy's!" She grinned widely, extending an arm that was engulfed in a worn long sleeve t shirt.

"You look great," Jay set her down on the ground and shed his coat, "And you put Mommy down for a nap?"

"Uh-huh," Kate nodded, "Cause I could tell her head was hurtin'. And so I said I was tired and that we should take a nap. And then she fell asleep but I came down to read books." Suddenly, the little girl's face dropped and she looked terrified, "Oh, no."

"What is it?" Jay asked urgently, sinking down to meet her eyes, "What happened?"

"I lied," Kate stammered, "I told Mommy I was sleepy but I wasn't." The poor child started to panic, "But I only said it cause I was worried 'bout Mommy but-"

"It's okay, kiddo," Jay reassured her, gently rubbing her arm, "I know you just wanted to get Mommy in bed. And that's okay. It wasn't bad and it was only a white lie." He instantly regretted his word choice, because he knew his clever little girl would want to know what a 'white lie' was.

"What's that?" Kate asked, appearing to relax, "A white lie?"

Jay nodded, "Sometimes it happens when you tell someone something that isn't entirely true just so that you don't hurt someone's feelings. And I know you didn't want to make Mommy feel bad about needing a nap." He cupped her cheek with his hand, "You're so thoughtful, Squirt."

Kate exhaled, "So I wasn't bad?"

"Nope," Jay kissed the top of her head, "But I bet you're hungry for lunch."

"A little," Kate shrugged, "Me and Mommy had bananas and strawberries and blueberries for breakfast. With peanut toast!"

"That sounds yummy," Jay glanced into the kitchen, "Why don't I see what I can whip us up, huh? Did you take your medicine this morning?"

"Uh-huh," Kate nodded, "Can I help?"

"Absolutely," Jay scooped up his little girl and headed for Hank's kitchen, hoping to find something to make lunch with.

"What's going on in here?" Erin asked, leaning against the doorframe to the kitchen, still clad in one of Jay's t shirts and a pair of old sweatpants. She definitely looked better than she had the other day, the nap having done wonders for the pounding headache.

"We makin' pancakes! For lunch!" Kate informed her mother gleefully, "Daddy came back early!"

"So he did." Erin made her way over to her partner and wrapped her arms around his waist, resting her head on his back, "I didn't even hear you leave this morning."

"That's because I was super sneaky." Jay spun around from the stove and kissed the top of Erin's head, "How are you feeling? How's the pain?"

"I'm fine." She relaxed into her partner's chest, listening to the gentle rhythm of his heartbeat as he held her. Jay inhaled deeply, lips still ghosting over Erin's head as he thought about how grateful he was to be surrounded by the girls he loved so much.

"Um, Daddy? The pancakes are burnin'." Kate urgently poked Jay with her finger, "I'm not 'lowed to touch the stove."

Jay chuckled and turned around, flipping the pancakes quickly. The side on the griddle was definitely darker than it should be, but luckily wasn't burnt to a crisp. "Good catch, Squirt. I think you saved this batch."

"Good thing I'm helping!" Kate exclaimed, kicking her legs out slightly in delight, "Grandpa Hank would be really grumpy if we burned his house down."

Erin smiled, snaking her arms around Jay's waist again and leaning into his side, "I guess it's okay that I'm not cooking then," She winked at the little girl, who giggled.

"Mommy you cook good!" Kate nodded seriously, "Daddy's just jokin' 'bout you burning the house down."

"She does make a mean chicken noodle soup," Jay flipped the pancakes onto the plate, one arm still draped over his girlfriend's shoulder, "And the best salads."

"So we get our veg-tubles so we can be strong!" Kate flexed her arms like Jay had shown her, earning more chuckles from her parents.

"You are absolutely right," Erin scooped the little girl into her arms and held her closely, "How did you get so smart?"

"I listen real good to what you say, Mommy," Kate told her, reaching a hand out to brush the hair off Erin's face, "You the smartest person I ever met."

"Well, thank you sweetheart, that's very kind of you to say." She kissed her daughter's cheek before setting her down in a kitchen chair.

"I'm serious." Kate stated with a straight face, "You are very smart." She looked up at her father, "Daddy's smart too. And Grandpa Hank. But Mommy is the smartest 'cause she knows everything."

Jay nodded in agreement, reaching for the plates and setting them down on the kitchen table. "Oh, I don't know everything." Erin smiled and sat down beside her little girl, awaiting a plate of pancakes.

"I don't know, I think you do, babe," Jay teased.

"See?" Kate grinned, obviously too young to understand the concept of sarcasm, "That's how come I know stuff, because you help me. And I'm not white lyin'."

"White lies?" Erin looked up at Jay, who immediately focused on transferring the pancakes to a serving plate, "How did you learn about those?"

"Daddy," Kate shrugged, "He said they were okay if you were trying to make people feel better but I'm not. And I know 'bout real lies and that they're bad. I learned 'bout them in school. And Miss Carlson says I'm a good listen-er."

"You are, kiddo," Jay slid two pancakes on her plate, "Let me know if you want more okay? We made a whole bunch."

"Long day?" Hank peered up from pulling his snow-covered boots off to see his almost-daughter standing in the doorway to the kitchen. While she looked considerably less ghostly than she did the day before, the dark circles under her eyes suggested she would benefit from a good night's sleep. He nodded, shedding his coat and placing it on the hook.

"We're getting closer," Hank offered a small smile and headed toward the fridge, "You probably shouldn't have a beer. Do you want a soda?"

She shook her head and stifled a yawn. "Jay's putting Kate down. She fell asleep while we were playing chutes and ladders."

"She doing okay?" Hank popped the cap off the bottle and took a long, slow sip of the cold beverage.

Erin nodded, trailing after her father figure as he headed for the living room, "Today she was totally fine. I mean a little worried here and there, but it's mostly hard at night. The nightmares are just…" she trailed off, unable to find a word to encapsulate just how upsetting, horrifying and traumatic her daughter's dreams were. "It breaks my heart," she said honestly, settling down on the couch.

Hank took another sip of his beer and nodded in understanding. "And how are you feeling?"

She shrugged, playing with the ends of Jay's long sleeve shirt that she was still clad in, "I'm fine."

"I should get you a coffee mug with that printed on it," Jay quipped, rounding the couch and sitting beside his girl, "Your head must be killing you."

She shot him a look, but it carried little weight with the tiredness behind her eyes. "I took two naps today."

"I know," Jay ran a hand over her head, "And I didn't get to tell you but Kate told me when I got home that she wasn't actually tired this morning, but she knew you were so she got you both into bed and snuck off once you fell asleep." He chuckled at Erin's incredulous expression, having been manipulated by a four year old.

"God, she's smart," Erin huffed, leaning in closer to Jay and glancing over to her father-figure and boss, "Tricked me into a nap at four years old. Damn."

"If it makes you feel any better, she was absolutely distraught when she realized she might have lied to you," Jay offered, "So to make her feel better I told her about white lies."

"Really, Jay?" Erin turned her head, "I was meaning to ask you about that. She's four."

"She's brilliant," Jay replied, catching his boss nodding in agreement out of the corner of her eye, "And I didn't want her to be upset."

"So, since you're both here, you can tell me straight. What's going on with the case?" Erin looked pointedly at her partner and then to Hank, "Come on, I have a right to know. And if you don't tell me I'll get Ruzek down here and he'll fold so fast-"

"We're looking into Bowler. Who Peter Jackson has retained as his attorney," Hank cut her off, "Crowley's got her hands on everything though, so things are moving slowly."

Before she could respond, Jay's phone rang shrilly, causing Erin to wince at the sharp noise, "Sorry, Er," He quickly silenced it and stood, "Halstead." The young detective's eyes went wide as he heard the familiar menacing voice on the other end of the line. 'Jackson' he mouthed, quickly turning the phone onto speaker. He pressed his finger to his lips and mouthed 'We're tracking it' to an incredibly perturbed Erin.

"…and I will see to it that the child is in my care, whether you accept it or not, detective," Jackson's icy voice echoed through the speaker, "Come hell or high water, she is going to be mine and I don't care who I have to kill because nobody is getting in my way."

Jay clenched his fists tightly and opened his mouth to speak, but the call disconnected. He glanced up at Erin, whose glassy gaze turned pointed and furious. "Tell me somebody's on that," she whispered, looking to both Jay and Hank who nodded simultaneously.

"Atwater had a tech buddy set up some kind of tracing device so that incoming calls get tracked back to their location. It's not exact, but it's within a few blocks." Jay pocketed the cell phone and settled back on the couch.

"Well, aren't we going to go after it?" Erin looked incredulous, "I mean, if you're tracking it?"

"O and Burgess are going to sit on the location for the evening, make sure he doesn't leave. If he's where they think he is. We've got covert cars in the area as well, so we have to wait for another call to triangulate it better," Hank informed her after taking another sip, "Gotta wait him out."

"Did we not hear the same threat?" Erin exclaimed, "He wants to take her away and kill anyone who tries to stop him. I think that warrants some kind of offensive action."

"Crowley's got her foot on the entire unit," Jay grimaced, "She'd shut down Intelligence and fire us all if we make any wrong moves. We gotta play it by the book, get the bastard and charge him. Then we'll ensure he goes to jail, but if we act too soon, we could blow it. And we can't risk that, for Kate's sake."

Erin huffed and leaned back against the cushions, listening as her almost-dad and boyfriend proceeded to speak civilly about the politics surrounding the chain of command and the department as a whole.

While Erin relaxed, Kate sat on third step down on the stairs, listening intently to the conversations that were taking place. She had heard her grandfather come home and wanted to greet him, but stopped short when Jay's phone rang. After hearing Paul Jackson's eerie threat, she knew what she had to do.

Kate quietly crept into the kitchen in her pajamas, searching for her snow boots and winter jacket. Jay had taken her outside to play that afternoon while Erin took another nap, so they were drying by the radiator near the back door. She swallowed hard before slipping on the boots, leaving the laces untied because her tiny hands had yet to master the skill. Kate pulled her jacket on over the long sleeve shirt of Erin's and shivered before reaching up with one hand to turn the handle on the back door, clasping Tiger tightly in the other, intent on putting as much space between the people she loved and the man who was trying to hurt them as possible.

Eeeeeep I was absolutely blow away by all the amazing reviews on the last chapter. Thank you thank you, they made my entire week! Fair warning, I started a full time job and though I have a few chapters already written I'm never home so updates aren't going to be as daily as they used to be (trust me, it pains me as well) BUT the reviews def keep me motivated to be as timely as possible. I also got some AMAZING suggestions that I will try to incorporate into future chapters. Keep sending those my way! xo