28: The gods have broken their silence

~Laith~

I spent the rest of the day reading from the holy book. Memorizing the holy verse to preach the holy word of the goddess to the people at a function tomorrow. 

The King is hosting a charity function at the palace for the second prince and his fiancee. To remove any bad omen that might hinder their alliance and to reassure the kingdom of my support for the crown. 

It is obvious that the party the other day left a bad impression in everyone's mouth. With all the drama that went down, especially the part I played in how things went down. 

The function was arranged to get the second prince and Princess Zakishi married at the earliest. The King and Queen were anxious and they weren't to blame. 

Somehow everyone was convinced that the evil one was responsible for the blood rain I caused. They considered it a sign from him, a warning of the doom he was to spread to all corners of the four lands. 

His name has spread fear in people's hearts. There is panic everywhere even though Prince Zephirin isn't to blame for anything that went down. 

I knelt before the statue of the goddess. With everything for the function arranged at her feet to get her blessings. My heart is burdened with the truth of my soul. 

My eyes trailed to the holy pool. The color of my tainted soul flashed in my mind. It haunted me. The place I call home and acted as my comfort zone has become a place that reminds me of the void inside my chest. 

A hole in the place where Caelan used to be. In the past, I had sinned by crying for a man. Unfortunately, I had yet to redeem myself for that sin and here I was. Kneeling before the goddess with a body that has had the nerve to bask in forbidden desires for both the deposed crown prince and the second prince. 

My heart is heavy with guilt. My hands weren't as clean as they used to be. The feeling was eating away at me, knowing the trust the world was putting in me to anchor the goddess's blessings to the world. It broke my heart. 

Tears traced down a path down my cheek. I lowered my head in mortification. I am too weak to walk down the holy path. To live a life of celibacy after getting a taste of the forbidden fruit. A fruit I desired more and more of each passing day. 

"Forgive me, for I have sinned, Mother, " I let out. Bowing my head and folding my hands above my head. I let out my sins to her. "Things have escalated since last we spoke. You know it as you see everything that goes on in the world, " I confessed. 

My heart squeezing in pain of letting her down. She trusted me with such a divine responsibility and here I was letting her down at every given step. 

"There is another that plagues my heart and soul, " I admitted. The goddess as my witness I acknowledged the feelings taking bloom in the deepest parts of my heart. "Zephevi holds my heart... "

Echoing footsteps approaching the inner chambers of the holy house had me cutting my confession short. 

The Saint made an appearance. Her eyes lit up as she caught a glimpse of me. She looked more alive than when she handed me the holy book to read and memorize the verses. She ambled over to my side, holding a bright smile on her face. 

I held my breath. Waiting to hear the news she had for me. The Saint bent down on the ground by my right-hand side and opened her palm. She presented a golden amulet to me. 

"The gods have broken their silence. They have spoken. They are on our side, we are sure to win against the greater evil, " she cheerily expressed. "You will emerge victorious in your fight with the Evil One, " she added. 

The news she let out was good according to her. However, it made my insides twist into knots. The news stunned me and shook me to the core. 

It is too hard for me to listen to anything that endangers prince Zephirin. The man didn't deserve the whole world plotting his doom because of a fate he didn't write. 

He deserved a chance. A chance to choose a different path for himself, no one is born to a single path. Zephevi is capable of kindness and love. Anyone capable of love is capable of being redeemed and guided down the right path. 

I refused to entertain the idea of fighting Zephevi. He is my light. When he didn't let me fall or stand back when I was in pain. Who am I to do that to him? 

The Saint unhooked the amulet and adorned it around my neck. "This will protect you from his influence. We can't underestimate the Evil One and should tread forward with caution, " she made the case as she hooked the amulet around my neck. 

I wanted to assure her of my safety. To inform her that the danger they needed to fear wasn't the Evil One but the demons within my soul. Prince Zephirin had no intentions of bringing me harm. It was quite the opposite, yet, I couldn't master the words to assure her. 

"Thank you, " I brushed my hand over the amulet. The amulet felt like a chain, meant to trap me in a beautiful cage and keep me away from Zephirin. 

My eyes landed on the bracelets around my wrist. The symbol of protection from the Evil One. They brought me more warmth than the amulet from the Saint. I trusted Zephirin's protection more than the Saint's as I knew, he saw the beauty in my darkness and didn't run. While I couldn't trust the Saint with my tainted heart or the sins that burdened my heart. 

There is no guarantee that she won't desert me if I show her my stained robes. 

"You are the hope of the world. The light to lead us into a brighter future. I believe in you, " she said. Her words deepened the guilt in my heart. My powers were useless against the Evil One, a fact I dreaded to disclose to her or anyone else.