9 LSAFH

"You don't understand. That woman is psychotic, okay? When I met her I was drunk, completely unaware of how I even started a relationship with her. I forced myself to stay with her because she was a clingy bitch who was spying on me twenty-four seven. She and I were celebrating someone's marriage and I got drunk, she got drunk- Everyone was drunk." I can hear my father's voice echoing from the hallway outside my bedroom door, but this hallway looks quite different.

As I approach the door after getting out of my bed, I hear my mother start shouting at him. "You are the reason we are having these problems. You're selfish! You should have ended it with her before deciding to go on dates with me, its all your fault that she has been trying to kill you. If you don't stop this, I'm sorry, but I'm taking your child away from you. You're causing me pain, and she's only seven, Chris. How do you think I feel? Your daughter is going to grow up and learn that you ruined our family. Please, do something right for once, besides caring so much for Alexis and making her believe that everything is okay."

"No. I can't do this right now Amanda. You don't need to do this right now. And you're not listening to me- if I try to end things with her she will go insane. I don't want to do this to you but I don't want to die, okay?." He sobs.

"You're so stupid, Chris! Calling the police is an option, and you know that! Why couldn't you have done that, huh?! This is why I was afraid of having a baby with you, you are irresponsible!"

"I'm done with this conversation." I hear him say before slamming a door.

I look outside my door to the left to see the living room of my old house. My young mother is sitting on the floor with her hands covering her face and I can hear her soft whimpers and sniffles. This is the night he was murdered, this was the argument they had that drove him away.

------------------------

Soon enough I begin to hear the faint sound of my dad's car engine approaching the foot of the driveway and I start panicking. Before I could relive through it once more, I am awoken by the doorbell ringing.

------------------------

"Hi, does Amanda Burkholder still live here or are you the current resident?" A woman dressed in a suit asks me. She looks somewhat familiar.

"How do you know my mother?" I peek behind her head to look at her car, which another person is sitting in the passenger seat.

"Oh, I didn't know she had a daughter, you're so beautiful, you look just like her." A short smile quickly appears on her face. "Do you mind if I come in to speak with you?" She asks, still smiling at me.

"Well since you know my mother I guess it wouldn't hurt, but please make it quick, I have someone coming over". I invite her inside and shut the door behind me.

"My name is Serena Allaband. I was sent here by a lawyer to discuss a horrible accident which I have caused many years ago, and now that I'm speaking of it you probably know what I'm trying to say. I am the woman who murdered your father when you were seven years old."

She said it so abruptly I can barely make sense of this situation. She came to our house out of nowhere to discuss the crime she committed. I don't know if she's trying to apologize or explain why she did what she did.

"That's why you look so familiar. But um, I kind of figured that out already- I mean someone told me but it wasn't my mom." As I'm speaking to her, I somehow manage to not lash out and smack her stupid. This woman... Why did I let her inside? I can't even make eye contact with her.

"Well, that's good news. I really didn't want to confront you about this but I worked up the courage to do so. I know this is hard to believe since it's coming from me but I am very truly sorry for what I have done. When I met your father, I was at my lowest. I am diagnosed with bipolar disorder, and I didn't find that out until after what happened. I was taken to a mental institution because after finding out that your dad met your mom, I went crazy and did horrible things, I sabotaged your father's life, and I've never committed a crime like that. A while after I was put on medication, I was told about the incident and I was shocked myself to know I did something like that. And I apologize sincerely for causing this damage to you and your mother."

"Look, Serena. I get that you have a mental illness and all, and I'm sorry you have to deal with that. But what you've done, I can never forgive you for. I have spent these past nine years blaming my own mother for this. What were you doing when you met my dad? Please explain so I can understand better because I'm still not sure how this led to you killing him with your car." I resist the urge to yell at her.

"He was drunk, I was sober. He was walking along the sidewalk, and he was almost going to fall. I was driving when I saw him so I stopped my car. I put him in the passenger seat and drove to my apartment. He crashed there overnight, and when he woke up I lied to him and told him we hooked up at a bar and went to my place. He somehow never found out. When we started talking to each other and developing a relationship, I started getting overprotective, jealous, and super clingy. When he worked his night shifts I assumed he was hanging out with another woman so I put a location tracker in his car, I sneaked into his house at night. I know it sounds psychotic but my bipolar disorder is severe, I'ts basically mania." she explains.

I may be stupid, but how does a mental illness drive you to do something like that? It doesn't really make sense if you ask me- But I've got to give her credit, she came to apologize for her wrongdoings, although it won't fix anything. But she needs to get out of this house before I kick her out myself.

"You basically kidnapped my father and forced him to be with you because he was already afraid you were going to kill him. I have night terrors because of you. I found everything out, because of you. My mother neglected me, because of you. Everything is because of you, and you better think about that long and hard. You took an important piece of my life away from me, and you're gonna pay for that. You can leave now."

"Alexis I know, but hear me out-"

"I don't wanna hear anything out. There are no excuses for what you did besides what you told me before. I don't need a pity party from you, please get out of my house. I appreciate you taking your time to explain and apologize to me, but I need time to myself. I've heard enough already." I cut her off, not even hesitating to.

—————————

As I watch her leave, a feeling of relief clashes onto me. I feel free- somewhat free from the hell that I've been living in.