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God Slayer: The Tale of Humanity's Last Stand

Tác giả: Kenji_Tezuka
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// A System Built to Fight the Gods! // Mankind has existed for hundreds of thousands of years and the time has finally come for them to be judged by the Heavens. After being sentenced to complete annihilation, the planet is to be wiped clean for a new species to take its place. Even while Heaven's might rains down upon the Earth, not all hope is lost. The Queen of the Underworld has sent chosen souls of the damned, dubbed Slayers, from the Underworld to mount humanity's final defense! Reincarnated souls from Hell that are equipped with the all powerful God Core System that allows them to consume the powers of a God to enhance their own to unimaginable lengths. Gear up because it's literal Hell on Earth. [ Author here! If you guys are enjoying the series, please feel free to vote for this work with your powerstones and tickets! This will allow me to publish even more chapters, do special events, and let me know you guys are enjoying it! Also, there is more of a stat involved part of the system that has been introduced in the later chapters(63). Experience isn't visibly tracked until this point - up until then it is still gathered and slayers do grow slightly stronger from fights, but there's no way of knowing how much has been gained until the chapter it's introduced.]

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Chapter 1Judgement Day

Year: 2021, New America

The buildings of a large industrialized city can be seen standing tall and defiant to the world around it. The sidewalks were congested with people and the summer heat beat down upon the pavement which caused the temperature to feel even warmer than it actually was. Toss in the constant fumes from the passing cars and it made the people feel like they were walking through the pits of Hell.

But it wasn't Hell. Not yet anyways.

An impatient driver(even less so with the heat) laid down on his horn as traffic had come to a complete stand still.

"Come on already! I'm late enough as it is!"

Another car responded in the same manner as no one knew what the hold up was. One by one, people on the sidewalks as well as those in their cars started to see a light coming from further down the road. It was like a little piece of the sun had dropped down to the ground just in time for work traffic.

"What's going on down there? It's so…bright." Someone said as they covered their eyes with their hand.

The light slowly dimmed and then vanished altogether. Curious, people got out of their cars and joined the throng of people as they walked down the road to investigate what was going on.

A crowd of people stood centered around the anomaly that blocked the road. Bathed in a diminishing glow of light stood an elegant white pegasus. It was the size of an average horse and had a pair of large beautiful wings. The crowd of people stood aghast at the sight as some pulled out their phones to get proof of the mythical creature that was before them.

"Is that…an actual pegasus?!"

"No way, this has to be some kind of trick. But…it's a pretty fucking good trick I'll admit."

The pegasus' eyes shifted across the crowd.

"But seriously, why is there a horse in the middle of the highway? I got places to be."

"Pegasus. Not a horse. Pegasus."

"Humans of Earth," the pegasus began, "I have come before you today with a message for your entire species."

Everyone's mouth fell open as its voice seemed to broadcast all around them.

"I am one of the many messengers of Heaven. Be not afraid of my form as I have chosen one that is believed to be pleasing to your kind. I am but one messenger, but there are many all over the world delivering the same message that I am about to now. Since the dawn of your creation we have watched your progress. Your deeds. Your misdeeds. Your choices. Your morals."

One of the people watching broke out into a large smile. "Oh my goodness…so it's all real! God actually exists!!"

The others in the crowd shared in the revelation of this news with joyous faces.

"Indeed human, there are higher powers at work in this universe and all others."

"Soooo, where is he?? Is he going to show himself to us?!"

"Or SHE." A woman in the crowd corrected them.

The pegasus continued. "No, I'm afraid you will not be meeting any of the Gods today."

"Wait, did you say GODs? Like…plural?" A man spoke up.

"Yes. There are multiple Gods. But, I'm afraid that is not why I am here today. You see, there comes a time where every species must be judged. After a certain amount of time has passed the Gods will convene and discuss if a species existence is beneficial or harmful to the rest of the universe. There must be balance within existence and maintaining that balance so that life can thrive is one of many duties a God must undertake."

The crowd seemed to be unable to fully grasp everything the pegasus was saying as their minds seemed almost unable to accept all of it.

"I'm here today as it was humanity's time to be judged. And judged you were."

"And what was the judgment?..." Someone asked.

The pegasus paused for a moment before speaking. "...Humanity has been deemed…unworthy. Countless wars. Hate fueled murder. Greed. Lust. Humanity has ranked itself with one of the worst races currently in existence. So it has been judged as a detrimental species to the rest of existence that takes everything but contributes nothing."

Everyone looked from one to the other.

"..so…what does that MEAN exactly?" Someone asked.

"The only thing to do with a species that is deemed unworthy, is to remove them from existence and replace them with a more worthy one."

"Wait wait wait. When you say remove?..."

"Total extinction."

The faces suddenly went from elated to horrified at its words. Just then, one of the drivers from further back burst through the ring of people as rage was clear in his face.

"Okay, what the actual fuck is going on here? I'm running late and you're all centered around a…a…fucking unicorn?!"

"Dude, it's a pegasus."

"Humans, what form you may perceive me as is of little difference to the message I just delivered." said the pegasus.

The angry driver pushed forward towards the pegasus. "How about you deliver your ass out my-"

Just as the driver approached the pegasus, he suddenly burst into an explosion of flesh, guts, and bone. Everyone that was near the angel was showered in the disgusting mixture. The civilians looked at their covered bodies with expressions of horror.

"While I'm sure that display of violence has turned you off to what I'm about to propose," the angel spoke up, "even though your species has been sentenced to extinction, we are not unfeeling. We have procedures in place to ensure this is a happy and painless end. So if you would all gather yourselves into an orderly line we can begin PEACEFULLY-"

"AHHHHHH!!!!" Screams filled the air as people began to run off in every direction as the situation suddenly became more real for them.

"Sigh. I'm sure I won't hear about this later…" The messenger spoke sarcastically.

A second bright light appeared high up in the sky. Everyone craned their heads upwards as if looking towards the Heavens for answers. But all they saw was a horde of armor clad warriors basked in a yellow glow and huge white wings. It would be such a beautiful sight if they all didn't bear deadly weapons in their hands.

The swarm of Angels swooped down from the sky as the humans ran for their lives.

"Well I suppose the cleansing shall commence then." The pegasus said.

*******

[2 years later, Crimson City]

Crimson City was one of the latest cities to appear since Judgement Day a few years prior. Humanity had been judged and the righteous fist of the Heavens unleashed. With all of the destruction and chaos around the world, new border lines were drawn and the old battle damaged cities were left behind for the new age. Nestled in the West of New America, it was one of the more booming cities to surface.

"Mom, it's so hottttt." A small girl whined as she could be seen holding onto her mother's hand.

The two were waiting at a crosswalk for the light to change. Cars were quickly passing by as the lunch traffic was in full effect.

"We're all hot, honey. But don't worry - we'll get you a nice cold treat if this light ever changes." The mom responded with slight annoyance. Just like any summer day in the city, the sun was beating down on all those below with no avail.

"The light changed!" The girl exclaimed.

"Finally, thank go-....well, I guess I can't really say that anymore."

"Say what, Mom?"

"Oh, it's nothing Sarah. Let's cross."

The two crossed the street as others passed them going the opposite direction. As the two were about to reach the other side, the girl suddenly stopped.

"Mom…is that another sun?" Sarah said as she pointed towards the sky.

"What's what?" She looked up to where the girl was pointing to and saw a bright light shining brightly above. Her face quickly transitioned to fear.

"We need to go. Now!"

Sirens that had been set up on various corners throughout the city started to blare out all at once in an almost deafening chorus. The sound of cars slamming on brakes filled the air as it seemed like life itself had come to a halt.

A man came out of a nearby shop and motioned for people to come. "Quickly everyone! There's an access door to the shelters in my basement!"

People adhered to the man's words and quickly, but orderly, filtered inside while others made off to different areas to avoid the wait.

"Attention citizens of Crimson City," a voice rang out from the sirens, "a Class C breach has been detected above the eastern sector. Please report to your closest safe area and enter the underground shelter. This is not a drill. Please report to the closest shelter entry immediately."

The Mom grabbed Sarah's hand and turned to make her way back across the street towards the shop. Meanwhile, Sarah was looking up towards the bright light that had begun to fade away. However there were now figures moving from the light towards the ground below.

"Ooooo...angels!" She said in awe.

The mom turned back and saw a horde of about 20 flying angels with large white wings, beautiful sharp features, and gold plated armor.

Also they each wielded a holy sword. Which of course they fully intended to use this day.

The mom's eyes grew wide as they descended down toward the still evacuating crowd of people, herself included. Floating above them all was a much more intimidating looking angel with a large body frame and 4 wings extending out of their back.

He had long blonde hair and an impressive set of black/gold armor that covered all but his head. In his hand he held a long spear with a glowing top and red silk wrapped down the pole.

"That's…an archangel." The Mom said as if she was afraid to even utter the words. She looked back to her child, "Sweetie, please, we have to go faster. Those are very very not nice people up there!" She pulled Sarah's hand along as she ran across the street. Just as they reached the sidewalk, Sarah tripped on the curb and fell over. The fall caused her to slip out of her mother's hand and hit the pavement hard.

"Ouch!" The girl cried out.

"Sarah!" The mom yelled as she turned around to see her daughter lain out on the ground.

But more horrifying, was the angel that was descending right down towards her with their sword pointed towards the ground.

"You all know your orders." The archangel's voice rang out from above for all to hear. "Not a human life escapes us today. Not. One."

"As it shall be." The angel spoke softly as they plunged down towards the helpless girl.

"Noooo!" The Mom ran to shield the girl from the attack.

A blast of glowing bullets battered the unaware angel and sent it flying off to the side.

"Ahhhhh!!!" The girl screamed as she covered her face in her hands. The mom looked to where the bullets came from and her eyes lit up.

"Lieutenant Nickels!" She shouted out in joy.

Lieutenant Nickels stood in the middle of the street as he held a smoking turret in his grasp. He had on the standard military uniform completed with the beret on top of his neatly cropped black hair. "Alright boys, time to clean house."

"Yes sir!" Shouted the unit of soldiers who rushed out past him fully armed. They immediately took aim at the incoming angel horde and opened fire.

Meanwhile, Sarah's mom sat clutching her on the ground as tears ran down her cheeks.

"I'm so sorry honey! I came this close to…to…I'll never let go of you again!" She bellowed out. The girl peeked through her mom's arms and saw the angel that almost attacked her lying on the ground unmoving. A yellowish white liquid leaked out of the bullet wounds and painted the ground around it. Then, right before her eyes the angel dissolved into specks of white light.

"Killing the body only frees the soul to fight another day." Lieutenant Nickels spoke out as he approached the two. "Have you never seen an angel pass before, little girl?"

"She's only 7…I've hardly even taken her out these past few years." The mother answered.

He leaned down towards the girl who looked at the gun in his hand with a hint of fear. "It's ok, we're only here to protect you from the bad guys."

Sarah peeked over her mom's arms. "The…bad guys? I thought angels were good?"

The Lieutenant smiled and looked at the battle before him. "Yes, there was a time that that was true. 'Fraid things have changed some."

"Did you kill it?"

"Yeah, not that easy. It'll be back in a new vessel at some point I'm sure. There's only one way to truly put an angel down." Lieutenant Nickles patted the girl on her head. "But I'm sure your mom doesn't want me filling your head with too many bad thoughts."

Lieutenant Nickels stood up. "You guys head to the shelter. We'll cover you."

The Mom nodded and scooped up her daughter before making a beeline to the store. He turned from them back to the battle scene. The effectiveness of their initial assault had started to wear off as the angels began breaking through. Soldiers screamed out as the angel's swords sliced through their armor and then their flesh.

Their numbers were quickly dwindling.

"Man, I must not be living right. One time Jun and his crew are late, a fucking archangel shows up." Nickels said as he looked at the archangel high above.

That's when the loud revving of an engine flooded the area.

Lieutenant Nickels looked to the sound of the incoming vehicle further down the road as it quickly weaved in and out of abandoned cars. It was a black armored car that was sleek like a sports car, yet was reinforced on all sides. On the side of the car was a picture of the Earth surrounded by the Ouroboros - a snake eating itself.

"Speak of the devil."

As the last of the civilians escaped into the store, a few stopped once inside as the car sped onto the scene. People's faces begin to become uncomfortable and scared whispers could be overheard.

Sarah and her Mom passed the people as they spoke in an uncertain tone about the help that just arrived. "Mom," the girl said, "why is no one happy about the people helping us?"

"It's…complicated, honey."

"But that man seems so nice." The girl said, confused.

"It's not them, it's the Slayers that are the problem."

"The…Slayers? Who are they?"

Lieutenant Nickels pulled his turret back up and opened up fire once more as his men struggled to hang on to their very lives. The angels were evasive as they zipped through the air and just as precise with their strikes.

The archangel above had a look of disgust on its face as it glared down at the incoming car. "The abominations have arrived."

I still haven't gotten used to it myself, thought the Lieutenant, ever since they started showing up some time ago, it's been a tough pill to swallow.

The black car came to a sudden screeching stop right out in front of the store as the doors lifted open.

"Slayers," said Nickels, "soldiers sent from the Underworld to lead the war against the Heavens."

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This review is entirely based on the first couple chapters that I read, and has nothing to do with the story, but everything to do with the writing itself. In terms of technique, the writing is very sound. However, if I may be blunt, it’s unbearably bland. It feels as if the author understands all the technique and rules, without fully grasping the underlying reasons those rules exist. Every line is delivered in a very matter-of-fact way, with almost no nuance or complexity to the descriptions. The dialogue between characters is incredibly predictable and carries no real humanity, feeling extremely artificial and devoid of character. There’s not a lot of immersion into the settings, with seemingly a minimal amount of detail provided for each scene. And overall, a lot of the writing feels less like reading a fluid work of art that the author enjoyed, and more like the author was trying to communicate as much information in the bare minimum number of words. In general, I am someone who does not value prose all that highly, but unfortunately this work fails to come across as being suitable prose whatsoever. I cannot speak to further on in the series, perhaps it improves, and if that is the case, I strongly urge the author to go back and revise the first few chapters. To the author, I do not mean to be disrespectful, I simply wish to provide criticism that I hope will be well recieved. I apologize if I was too blunt. I think the idea behind this story is intriguing, and I think there’s a lot of potential here. What I would say as advice is just to simply have fun with it. Put yourself in the settings, imagine the sights, the smells, the sounds, and describe them as well as you possibly can. Think of voices and accents for your characters, and how they would say something differently than you might say it, or another character might say it. Things like that. I wish you the best, and I hope this was in some way helpful :)

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