Some more tea

*tap* *tap* *tap* Footsteps echoed out from beneath me.

Here I am again.

On this golden road, leading to nowhere.

No. perhaps it does lead to somewhere, I just can't remember where.

*tap* *tap* *tap*

I'm starting to get annoyed by my own footsteps, but they're the only sound I can register on this path.

I've been having this dream again. This Golden road, or perhaps it's a bridge? I'm not exactly sure.

Everything else in this dream world is blank, as if nothing besides this road should exist.

This golden path gives off such a majestic presence, that it would make it hard for anyone to breathe. The gold bricks, the pale golden luster decorating this path would give anyone an awe inspiring feeling. As if nothing else should exist.

Yet I know the truth.

Without stopping my legs, I stared deeper into the grand golden road.

And all I saw was the corpses beneath my feet.

∞

"Be honest with me, what's the secret to your tea?" Gold exhaled a sigh of satisfaction.

"Ufufu, there's no secret. All you need is proper preparation." Akeno smiled at her guest who seemed to stop by all of a sudden. But she didn't have much else to do since Rias was still busy in the underworld, although she was supposedly returning soon.

"Does that tea ceremony crap actually do anything?" he raised a brow.

"I'd prefer if you didn't call it crap." she glared at him a little with a frown, but to Gold it looked more like a pout so he chuckled.

"Alright my bad, but seriously does it?" he held up his hands in surrender

"I'm not in the mood to tell you now."

"Aw come on, don't be like that. I said I was sorry."

"It'll take more than that to make it up to me."

"Really? And how do you propose I make it up to you, I should warn you that I was never really into any of that bondage stuff. Although I've been trying to find a hobby recently, so I'm trying to keep an open mind." Just sex might get boring eventually, he wondered if he should give other fetishes a try.

"Oh? I think I could help you with that." Her eyes gleamed with interest as Gold turned back to her. Akeno barely noticed it, but a small golden light flickered in his eyes as his expression became a little more serene than usual. Before she could ask about it, she found herself pressed against the wall.

Her sizable jugs were pressed tightly against his shirt as she felt something incredibly hot beneath her waist.

"You know, I'm the type to be on top but I feel like you would be perfect for both roles." He whispered next to her ears. All of a sudden Akeno felt her body shiver uncontrollably from his hot breath.

The light in Gold's eyes flickered off and returned back to his usual gray as he backed off from the voluptuous girl with confusion.

"Aeuughh~" For whatever reason, Akeno found her undergarments wet as she slid down the wall with a strange look of ecstacy. She didn't know why, but she literally just came from the sound of his voice.

"What the fuck?" Gold blinked as he wasn't sure what he just did. It felt natural, but at the same time it didn't. "Uh, thanks for the tea. See ya later Akeno!" he left quickly as he wasn't sure what happened.

∞

Leaving the little shrine, I casually pretended like nothing odd happened.

'Well that was weird, maybe Akeno's going through something right now.' I thought as I attempted to rationalize why the girl was acting like that. Actually now that I think about it, why did I press her against the wall? Weird.

I shook my head. Women are weird sometimes, obviously as a guy I just can't expect to understand them. Well let's find something else to do.

I had a bit of fun going back into the past and beating up the bastards that were about to pass that damn law that would censor all pornography with Rizevim. Fun times, it's a shame that we'll have to murder each other one day. But we'll cross that bridge when we get to it.

On a side note, I have no idea where that mime went. Like when we came back, it was just gone. I asked Akemi about it, but she didn't answer me, she just gave me a look and walked off.

I can't actually find the mime with the Truck either because it was never named. Oh well, I doubt this will come back to bite me in the ass.

Now to figure out what to do now. I wasn't planning on leaving Akeno's place so soon, but some things you just can't plan for.

"Oh wait, I haven't pissed off the readers properly in awhile." This was true. However it was also difficult to pull off. Mainly because after the whole Serafall thing it was difficult to really make anyone pissed off from then on.

Can't use things before like breaking the 4th wall because the reader would already be used to that kind of thing. Let's think about this logically.

Readers generally hate it when the protagonist does something completely stupid or maybe out of character. Unfortunately I don't have a set character so that can't be used, I'm the type of character that's just supposed to be disliked from the start.

I could do something stupid I guess. What else is there?

People generally dislike it when MCs follow canon with barely little to no change in the story. Like the MC will be there but everything he says is basically ignored for some reason. Unfortunately I can't do that either, because Rias and Koneko are in the underworld right now.

I could also get nerfed for absolutely no reason after abruptly traveling to another world, but technically I'm already nerfed if you count my past life.

Which means that all I have left is doing something unexplainably stupid.

But what? Oh wait! Readers also hate simps/people who help other characters for pretty much no reason besides liking their appearance! That's genius! That'll piss off those shitty readers!

Now where do i find a cute character to simp for?

"Hm?" I glanced to the side when I felt something tug my sleeve.

"Who?" I blinked as I saw no one. Then I felt the tug again and looked down. "Huh..." I blinked at the gothic lolita lookin girl with X shaped pasties covering her nipples.

"Kill baka red for me?" I heard the genderless infinite dragon ask. Well this is convenient.

∞

Within the void between worlds that is the Dimensional gap, an oversized red dragon was casually vibing as he did killer backflips without anyone to see.

This was Great Red, the Apocalypse Dragon or the Dragon of Dreams and many other titles the author can't seem to remember. It was about 100 meters with a horn on it's snout, it basically looked like a western dragon.

"Woah, nice backflip!" Great Red turned to the voice that was capable of penetrating the ever present silence.

Gold stood in the void with nothing but Ophis holding onto him to stop his body from getting destroyed by the Dimensional Gap. He could probably survive if he used his own magical energy, but if an overpowered loli dragon was offering to shield you from the void then why not take it right?

On one hand, Great Red was pleased to have his backflip complimented on. On the other hand, some random bastard distracted him from continuing and is still staring at him. It aggrivated him, so the red dragon opened it's giant maw and breathed out an endless stream of flames at the blonde.

"Kuhahahaahahaha!" To Great Red's surprise, the blonde survived judging from the maniacal laughter echoing out through the void. Gold could see that that the giant dragon was wondering how he survived, so he picked up Ophis who was hidden behind him.

Raising the loli up like Simba from the Lion King, Ophis was put up on display with a blank expression still present on her face. "Lolis, son! They react to big bros getting bullied! You can't hurt me Red!" Gold explained to Great Red who was just as confused as Ophis was at the moment.

"Big bro?" the loli dragon asked out loud with invisible question marks hovering around her head.

Without saying anything else, Gold put down the loli dragon before turning his gaze back to Great Red. "There's an old saying... Gotta catchem all." he said slowly much to their growing confusion.

"And that includes you big guy!" Gold pointed towards Gread Red with a purple ball in his hand as he turned his trucker hat backwards with out of place determination on his face.

For some reason this action irked the Apocalypse Dragon, so it began to dive straight towards the oddly determined blonde with an earth shattering roar.

Gold watched silently with complete focus, he didn't flinch despite a 100 meter dragon coming right towards him. With a press of a button, the purple ball in his hand expanded before he threw it right at Great Red's snout.

The ball impacted and bounced off the dragon's snout before opening and sucking the Dragon of Dreams in with a red beam. The purple ball shook a few times before it finally clicked. Gold moved closer to the floating ball and grabbed it.

"I caught Great Red!" Gold raised the Master Ball up with stars in his eyes while Ophis silently clapped behind him.

"Now let's go!" he said before picking the loli dragon up and heading home.

Pissing off the readers by helping out a random loli for basically no reason?

Check.