Cansada

Kyanwan, pronounced (Key-an-won) , was an angel. Honestly. When had she done anything wrong? as a matter of fact. when had she done anything?

Kyanwan is an Apathic person. an indifferent one. She would see children getting beat half to death and would look twice before walking away. She was not a devilish person nor she was a God sent. If the matter didn't involve her, why should she interfere?

she was once asked why did she walk away when an elderly couple was getting attacked.

her response caused the entire community to condemn and avoid her.

'if it was not hers, why would she fix someone else's problem?' was what she wrote in her little note pad. To this day, she couldn't fathom why everyone expected her to be the hero, to be a good Samaritan. she was obeying the law, wasn't that enough? why should she go out of her way to "Save" someone and put herself in the same situation as them?

Kyanwan, had a rough childhood. she was an only child. Growing up she was around a Father that didn't care and an alcoholic mother who often abused, degrade and gaslight her. Her father would often ignore her presence and on more than one occasion would sit on the side lines as Kyanwan was getting tortured with cigarette buds on her back.

no amount of pleading, yelps or cries could get her father to come and save her, that was when she realized she had no one, no one would save her. The realization shocked her to her very soul.

And from then on, it was like she had been watching her life through a screen, she was there, here. interacting with the real world while simultaneously was elsewhere. She was conscious, seeing the actions her body was taking yet it felt like she wasn't taking them herself.

many memories back then were blurred and some even forgotten, it was the mind's way of telling her she was broken and needed therapy, but she had already gave up on everything and everyone years ago.

She didn't care anymore. The world could Burn and she still wouldn't give a damn. she was just tired. tired of living.

Nighttime quickly came as daytime went, Kyanwan sat in her usual spot by the lavicous river where tropical fish would reside. The peach white jacket draped over her as her feet dangled over the edge.

As soon as she was dozing off she heard foot steps which snapped her awake. From what she could tell, the person was at a leisurely pace and soon, the foot steps stopped as the person sat beside her.

" Hey lille Missy, don't ya know it's dangerous to be out here at night?" The old man said in a grumpy voice that was rough.

Kyanwan looked at the man for a few minutes before looking outwards, to the river.

"Not much of a talker huh?"the old man huffed," kids these days, thinking they're so big no one can talk to them"

Kyanwan looked to the man once more, she was twenty-two, she thought but the didn't say. it was not like he'll listen anyway.

"Back in my time, if ya ever try that with your pops or ma, you'll get twenty lashes!" The old man started.

Seeing as he was about to dive in momory line, she quickly pulled out a piece of paper and wrote to him.

' Shut up or Go.' Kyanwan hold up the paper, starring into his eyes with a blank look.

the old man was appalled. " Excuse me?! do no who i am!? you should be grateful I took time out of mah day to talk to you!" He spat, coughing between sentences.

Just as quickly as he spat his words Kyanwan wrote.

' I don't care who you are. I never asked. I didn't ask you to spill your life story nor did I asked to converse with you. Shut up or leave '

then she turned back to the river, maybe if she ignored him he'll go away.

Not used to rejection the old man pulled out his knife stabbed her with it a couple times. the shock sent her tumbling into the river.

she had nothing to say as the old man stood up and spoke, "tsk, your the first and last to turn down a conversation from me. Hope you rot on lady lavicouses shore" with that, he left.

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She doesn't know how much of Time had passed. she couldn't feel anything other than the dull ache that the stabbling induced.

Kyanwan was dying, and she knew it.

Kyanwan looked at the night sky in the river. The stars and moon shunned beautifully, as if it was congratulating her on graduating from this world.

a pained grimace etched on her face as she continued to stare into the shining stars and moon.

Oh God, she was so tired