Volume I - Chapter 1

"Suffering begins along with happiness, for the moment we are happy, we are susceptible to suffering."

These words have never made so much sense.

I've gone through so many problems in my life that I really think I am paying for something my past self did.

- Damn it... - I muttered, coughing up blood while clutching my chest.

A puddle of blood began to form due to the wound. A dagger was now piercing my chest, with a short handle and a large blade, something like a kitchen knife. The intense rain was falling, drowning out any sounds of agony I might make and washing away the blood spilled on the street.

- Well, I guess I deserve it after all... - I sighed. The ground was starting to get cold. "It's so chilly; will I finally get some rest?"

I glanced slightly to the side and saw the body of a man I once called a friend lying next to me, along with some other lifeless bodies.

- I hope I don't meet these jerks in hell. - I blinked slowly.  - Ah, I'm sleepy...

I thought aloud. The streetlights illuminated my face, the street was empty, and I was fading away, just another statistic. And how did I end up here? If only I had left earlier...

A few hours earlier.

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There I was, like anyone else, working on another exhausting day in an office where I was a programmer and designer. I always enjoyed drawing and, together with programming, dreamed of becoming a game developer. But life isn't a bed of roses.

Due to various setbacks and issues in my life, I never managed to pursue my dream, and I ended up being incarcerated for two years after a small "incident" of home invasion. I was wrongfully accused, all part of something bigger.

Now I'm just a wage earner. I managed to clear my record after two years of fighting for freedom, and now, at 23, I got a trainee position at a development company.

Currently, I'm finishing correcting an error in the code of one of the variables that's causing a cascade effect in a program. But why is a trainee doing this?

???: Come on, kid! No slacking, we need to finish this program as soon as possible. Fix the errors and send the hotfix to the update team!

- If you weren't bothering me, I'd have already finished, - I muttered to myself quietly, sighing at the end.

???: Did you say something, kid?

- No, nothing, = I rolled my eyes and continued.

I glanced at the clock: it was already 7:00 PM, and it seemed I wouldn't be leaving anytime soon. It was the end of the working hours, and I was still working.

???: Hurry up! - he said, pushing me lightly and laughing under his breath. - If it weren't for me, you wouldn't even be here. No senior wanted to accept a junior who had been in jail. You should be thanking me.

- I'm sorry, Heitor. I'm doing as fast as I can. There are many errors in the variables, and even the notes left are confusing, as if someone had hit their head on the keyboard.

Heitor: What did you say? Are you saying I can't program, kid?! - He raised his voice and slammed the table, staring at me.

- Well, if you're offended, you must be the idiot who wrote that crap with your ass." - I side-smiled at him. - Figures! A loser like you would have this level of coding. - The change in attitude was noticeable immediately. Heitor looked surprised for a moment, but his face quickly turned into a scowl of pure rage and disbelief.

Heitor: What the hell did you just say, kid?! - He asked, enraged.

His hand went to my head, gripping my hair and slamming my face against the keyboard, pressing me into the keys that popped off.

- Haha! You really are a piece of crap, taking out your frustration on me, huh? Loser!

Heitor: Who the hell do you think you're talking to? You filthy brat! - He threatened to slam my head against the keyboard again, but paused when I raised my phone.

- You know, going through jail gives you experiences you'd never get otherwise. Like, for instance, knowing how to get what you want without getting your hands dirty. - The phone was displaying a bank statement. Without hesitating, he grabbed the phone and began reading. I just straightened my oversized shirt and started placing the popped keys back in place.

Heitor: W-what the hell... Where did you...

- You should encrypt your passwords and stop writing them down on a notepad. It's not safe, you know? - I smiled at him as I looked over my shoulder.

I turned back to the phone and opened a window with other screenshots of his wife talking to a guy from HR.

- It must be hard, right? Embezzling money to support a woman and then getting cheated on by the guy you're stealing from.

Heitor: You little shit, you think this will stand? You're screwed! - He tried to grab my head again.

I turned my face and held his arm by the hand, dislocating it with some effort. My eyes shone a bright crimson, which scared him even more. He screamed loudly, but I muffled it with my hand and looked at him seriously. My face conveyed coldness as I spoke slowly.

- If you scream again, I'll break the other hand. - I released him, and he held back his scream.

His eyes were filled with both fear and anger. I moved my hand to the back of my neck, scratching it while still glaring at him, feeling nothing but repulsion for letting this drag out so long. How tiresome.

- Give me your arm. - I grabbed his arm before he could respond. "Count to three."

I prepared to reset his wrist.

- Three! - I moved my hands to put his wrist back into place.

He screamed, holding his good hand over the injured wrist.

- Let's make a deal! I'll fix this mess you made and keep your secrets. But I don't want to hear you say anything about me, got it?"

He just nodded his head and left. I looked at the computer screen, which had gone into sleep mode, and noticed that my eyes were red.

- It happened again... - I took a deep breath, trying to calm down. I was rattled.

I breathed slowly and steadily for a few seconds, and when I looked at my reflection again, my eyes were back to their usual deep dark brown.

- I need to control myself better, - I murmured.

I went to my desk, opened the drawer, and took some pills, swallowing two at once without water. I sighed deeply and sat down, returning to my work. I pinched the bridge of my nose, as if massaging the area, and continued to correct the codes.

Until a coworker came to talk to me.

Coworker: Hey, Cross, did something happen? - He asked, raising the partition that separated our office cubicles. - I went to the restroom, and when I came back, Heitor was holding his wrist and sweating. What happened?

- He just got hurt, no big deal.

Coworker: I see. So, are you up for a drink after work? We'll probably leave late, as always.

- I don't mind, - I shrugged, focusing on my work.

This coworker was just an ordinary guy, with no distinctive features, a regular guy with a regular face, dark brown eyes, hair a shade lighter, and an energy that I had no idea where he got, coming to work every day with a smile on his face.

I continued working for hours, glancing at the photo of my mother on my desk. She was holding a small child with short black hair and equally dark eyes. A taller girl with long, dark hair and a visibly sassy demeanor in the photo stood beside them, her eyes also dark. Beside them was a woman holding the hand of the older girl, with artificially blonde hair and also blue eyes - contact lenses.

I stared at the picture for a few seconds and sighed, setting it down.

- Bad memories, - I thought, refocusing on my work.

After making sure everything was ready, I finally initiated the program.

I looked around, but everyone else had already left. When I checked the clock, it was already 2:00 AM.

- Oh, it's this late again. - I sighed and started packing up my things.

I saved the program and backed up the code. Then, I began shutting down all the stabilizers and turning off the electrical equipment.

- Time to head home, but, in truth, it doesn't make any difference. Nobody is waiting for me anyway. - I grimaced in disappointment and sighed.

I grabbed my backpack and stepped out of the building. The street was deserted like never before, with an abnormal cold for where I lived. Personally, I loved this kind of weather.

- One last swig for you, shitty life. - I took a gulp of the Mango-flavored Monster drink.

I began walking, needing to pass through a somewhat dark and off-street alley to get home. As I entered the alley, I heard footsteps behind me. Turning my head, I saw three people in front of me and two more at the entrance I had just passed.

- Can I help you guys?

Man 1: Are you Cross?

- And if I am?

Man 3: Then we're talking to a dead man. - One of the men behind me responded.

They pulled out knives, while another had a baseball bat, and the last one held a chain. Apparently, someone wasn't pleased with my departure.

Before I could say anything, one of the men with a knife lunged at me aiming to cut me. I swiftly dodged, taking a light step and pivoting on my foot. I grabbed his wrist and lifted my leg towards his arm, breaking it as I kicked.

The man howled in pain, but my expression remained neutral. Then, as I bent down to pick up the knife from the man whose arm I'd just broken with ease, I began to speak.

- Who sent you?

Man 4: "You think... we would talk, asshole?" The man on the ground groaned in pain.

- I don't need all of you alive. - I held his head and slid the blade across his neck.

He squirted an obscene amount of blood and started choking on his own bodily fluids.

- I just need one alive. - I cleaned the knife on the clothes of the man, who was now dead, and stood up.

The other two men charged at me at once: one with a knife and the other with a baseball bat.

The man with the knife came at me fiercely trying to cut me, and I just quickly dodged, leaning back as he attempted to attack until I threw the knife somewhat carelessly at him, embedding it in his leg with the force I threw.

Man 3: Argh! Son of a bitch! - He weakened, trying to pull the knife from his leg.

The man with the bat came to attack me, and I just grabbed the bat, kicking him hard, which sent him flying a few meters away until he stopped outside the alley, underneath the streetlight.

The remaining two men stopped watching and came to assist the man who was in trouble. The man with the chain started swinging it wildly, trying to attack me, while the other, who had a hatchet, tried to cut me.

I grabbed the chain when it hit my arm hard, leaving a mark, and managed to pull it forward, avoiding the attack from the man with the hatchet. The man who was now behind me pulled the knife from his leg and drove it into my stomach, laughing.

Man 3: Die, you little shit! - He exclaimed as he attacked me.

I felt the knife piercing my flesh and momentarily lost balance, but quickly recovered. It couldn't end like this. I grabbed the arm of the attacker, who was holding a hatchet, and wrapped a chain around his neck, beginning to strangle him.

Man 2: Let me go, you piece of shit! - He elbowed my chest, trying to get free.

The man holding the chain tried to attack me, but I hit him with a kick to the stomach, making him fall to the ground. Then, by kicking his face, I knocked him unconscious.

The man who had stabbed me was trying to attack again, but I didn't want to hurt his partner, who was being used as a human shield while I was strangling him with the chain.

Finally, I pulled the chain tightly, lifting the man, and heard a sharp sound of a bone breaking. Soon after, he struggled a bit and then went still, dead.

Man 3: What the fuck are you?! You monster!

- Heard that many times. - I pulled the knife from my back and threw it, this time hitting the head of the man who was kneeling. Thus, I ended the fight with three dead and two unconscious.

I was bleeding, but I wouldn't die.

I went to the chain man, who was now unconscious, and picked up the hatchet that was on the ground. With a swift motion, I pierced the heart of that bastard.

- You shits! Think I'm easy to kill? - Looking at my reflection in the pool of blood that formed, I noticed that my eyes were crimson red again.

- My meds... - I rummaged through my backpack, searching for them, until I heard a whistle of surprise, followed by a familiar voice.

???: Damn... Looks like you haven't changed at all, Cross. Broke the poor guy's spine with a kick? - He asked, placing his hand on the neck of the man lying next to the post. - And he's dead too. Great for me! Less work.

I turned my face towards that peculiar voice and found myself facing an individual who seemed to revel in the misfortune of others. His eyes were notably heterochromatic, one deep and clear amber and the other a vibrant green, concealing a mischievous and unpredictable spirit. Dark, somewhat disheveled hair framed his face, giving him a casual and irreverent air.

Two cross necklaces hung at his chest, perhaps indicative of some distant faith or mere aesthetic choice; it was impossible to decipher. He took a few pictures of the unconscious man, a mocking laugh escaping through his lips as he looked at his phone screen, clearly pleased with the scene captured.

- Edgar... What are you doing here? - I leaned against the wall, walking towards him. I felt a bit dizzy from the blood loss.

Edgar: Hey, Cross! You started causing chaos again and didn't even call me? - He walked over and placed my arm over his shoulder, assisting me out of the alley.

- What are you doing here, Edgar? I thought you left the country after getting out of prison.

Edgar: I came back because of this, buddy. - He smiled and looked at me.

I felt pressure on my chest and intense pain, and when I looked down, I saw Edgar slowly driving a knife into me.

- H-hey, Edgar? - I coughed up blood, losing my strength - What the hell is happening?

Edgar: Sorry about this, Cross. I need money to get out... and there's a hefty bounty on your head.

- You son of a... - I fell to the ground as I tried to grasp his shirt collar.

Edgar: Don't take it personally, you know how life is here... so don't be mad at me. - He stood up and took a picture of me, smiling after a notification beep - Thanks from the bottom of my heart, buddy! You saved my life. - He gave me one last look before turning around and walking away.

Intense fury filled my eyes as I watched that wretch leave. I grabbed the hatchet lying near me, rose with my last strength, and shouted his name, throwing the weapon at him with all my might.

- EDGAR! Send my regards to your mother in hell... - I said, and he quickly turned around.

The hatchet spun through the air, its blade hitting Edgar's chest, piercing through his ribcage and going deep into his body. I collapsed to the ground after throwing it and couldn't see the expression on his face.

I heard the sound of a body falling, looked over with difficulty and saw him holding the hatchet, trying to pull it out. I spat out a large amount of blood, lost my balance, and fell to the ground.

- Shit... I thought you were my friend. - I said slowly and with difficulty.

Edgar: I needed to... - His voice was low and then I couldn't hear him anymore.

The night's cold intensified as my blood gushed out rapidly. The dark sky seemed to mourn the scene unfolding before it, and soon it started to rain.

- What a... shitty day... - I sighed and coughed again. My body was growing cold and my limbs heavy. I couldn't move, even if I mustered all my strength.

"Ah, so this is how I'm going to die?" I thought, staring at the streetlight as the rain seemed to wash away my sins, sins I would certainly pay for.

"Alright, I hope I can finally rest."

???: ...

"What?"

???: ....

I hear a faint and distant voice saying something, but I can't understand.

???:  ł ₣ØɄ₦Đ ɎØɄ!

"What is it saying... I can't understand... It's like a bunch of static noise."

???: ₮Ⱨ₳₮ ฿Ɽ₳₮ ₩Ɇ₦₮ ₮Ø ₳ ⱠØ₮ Ø₣ ₮ⱤØɄ฿ⱠɆ ₮Ø ⱧłĐɆ ɎØɄ

"What the hell is it saying... forget it! Just let me die, I'm tired." I try to ignore the voice and sleep.

???: ₮ł₥Ɇ ₮Ø ₲Ø ⱧØ₥Ɇ ₵ⱧłⱠĐ, ł ₵₳₦ ₣ɄⱠ₣łⱠⱠ ₩Ⱨ₳₮ ł ₱ⱤØ₥ł₴ɆĐ ⱧɆⱤ

The voice echoed around me, coming from all angles until gradually fading away. I felt something warm enveloping me, and then everything vanished. For a long time, I felt nothing and thought I had finally died. Then, I began to feel less sleepy and gradually regained sensation in my body, but it felt odd. I couldn't move it and felt something warm in my belly occasionally. I have no idea how much time had passed, but it wasn't short.

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Finally, I opened my eyes and saw a light. I felt constricted and my body was limp. My arms wouldn't move as I wanted and instinctively, I tried to follow the light without understanding what was happening.

Doctor: It's a boy, congratulations!

My eyes were still adjusting to the light.

"What the hell is going on?" When I finally managed to get a proper look, I realized I was in the arms of a doctor who was looking at me strangely.

Wait, how could he be holding me in his arms?

Doctor: Hmm? He's not crying. - The doctor turned me around and patted my bottom, looking for some reaction from me.

"Hold on, am I a baby? What the hell is this, WHAT THE HELL-!"

- Uweeeee!!!