Alfonzo's Pettiness

Earth Land, Ishgar, Kingdom of Fiore, Magnolia.

September 1, x786.

"Fairy Tail! We're back!" Alfonzo shouted as soon as he, Erza, Mirajane, and Sun walked through the guild hall's doors.

In the next instant, a blur of pink and Baby blue slammed into Alfonzo's chest before wrapping its arms and legs around his neck and torso. A moment later, Alfonzo was pulled into a passionate kiss, his tongue entangling with his assailant.

"I swear, this happens every time." Mirajane said with a smile. "Lici never seems to remember anyone that went with Alfonzo when she first sees him after a trip."

"Indeed." Erza replied with a smile of her own. "I've experienced this before. The last time was during that quest in Rosemary Village, I believe."

"It's just cause Lici loves Alfonzo so much, ya see?" Sun said happily, having missed the loving atmosphere in the guild.

"Alfonzo! Fight me!" Natsu shouted from the table where the group of friends usually sat.

"*Sigh* And this never changes, either." Mirajane said in an exasperated tone.

And just as Mirajane expected, Natsu, while propelling himself towards the group of new arrivals with his flames acting as propulsion, came flying towards the group at high speed. Unlike all the other times, however, Natsu did not immediately attack. Instead, he landed in front of Alfonzo awkwardly.

"Hmm… This is unusual." Erza said while rubbing her chin with her gauntleted left hand. "Natsu did not just attack without worrying about those surrounding Alfonzo."

"Yeah, it's really weird." Sun said while tilting her head cutely. "I wonder what happened? Did he get sick?"

"No! Of course not!" Natsu shouted indignantly. "I've never been sick a day in my life!"

In the next instant, Natsu's expression turned bashful as he started scratching the back of his head.

"It's just now I know how bad it is to interrupt a couple while they're kissing." Natsu said with a slight blush on his face. "I wouldn't like it if someone interrupted me and Lisanna, you know."

Hearing that, Erza, Mirajane, and Sun opened their eyes wide in surprise. Even Alfonzo, who had been lost in his kiss with Ellicia, opened his eyes as he broke the kiss, causing Elicia to pout at the interruption.

A moment later, Alfonzo, Erza, Mirajane, and Sun turned their surprised gazes towards the table where their friends sat. More specifically, towards Lisanna, who was smiling happily with a slight blush on her face.

"Lisanna, is it true?" Mirajane asked in a dumbfounded tone.

Nodding happily, Lisanna confirmed everyone's speculations.

"Yeah, Natsu and I are a couple now." Lisanna said happily. "We started going out at the beginning of last month. And Natsu was so cute when he took me out on our first date."

"Lisanna, don't say that." Natsu said bashfully.

A moment later, when the gazes of the new comers returned to him, Natsu turned away in an attempt to hide his blush. Though, his attempt was futile. Then, to add to Natsu's embarrassment, Happy flew over before landing on his shoulder.

"That's right!" Happy exclaimed energetically. "Natsu loves~~~~ her!"

"Happy~~~~!" Natsu whined embarrassedly.

"Holy shit…" Alfonzo muttered in a disbelieving tone.

"I know what you mean, Fonzie." Elicia said with a smile. "I was just as surprised the first time I saw Lisanna and Natsu holding hands while they walked through the town."

While Alfonzo, Erza, and Sun were still frozen due to the news of Natsu and Lisanna starting a relationship, Mirajane had rushed over to her younger sister. And when she heard Elicia talk about the two holding hands, she put on a stern expression.

"Lisanna, I thought I taught you better than that." Mirajane said in a tone filled with mock anger. "Holding hands in public… So lewd. I didn't raise you to be such an exhibitionist!"

At first, Lisanna wore an expression filled with apprehension when she saw her older sister's stern expression. However, when she heard her following words, Lisanna's apprehensive expression turned into a deadpan immediately.

Seeing her sister's change in expression, Mirajane's stern expression melted away at once. Then, she pulled Lisanna into a tight hug with a loving smile on her face.

"Congratulations, Lisanna." Mirajane said happily. "You finally took the step towards getting your own happiness."

Hearing her sister's words, Lisanna's deadpan morphed into her usual cheerful expression. Then, she returned Mirajane's hug happily.

"Thanks, Big Sis." Lisanna said cheerfully. "And it's all because of your advice. I was the one who asked Natsu out."

"Yeah, Lisanna asked him like a real man!" Elfman shouted, clearly proud of his younger sister's initiative.

In the next instant, however, Elfman shrunk back thanks to the intense glares he received from Mirajane and Lisanna.

During this conversation, Alfonzo, Elicia, Erza, Natsu, Happy, and Sun had made their way over to the table, as well. While Natsu took a seat next to Lisanna, and Elicia took the seat she vacated when she launched herself at Alfonzo, Alfonzo, Erza, and Sun remained standing.

"Anyway, I'm gonna go talk to Ur." Alfonzo muttered discontentedly. "I gotta give the guild their damn cut."

"At least this is the last time, though, right." Gray asked. "By the way, welcome back, you guys."

"Thank you, Gray." Erza replied to Gray's welcome. "And it's good to be back home. We'll have to take a quest to celebrate our return."

"Um… About that." Gray said while scratching the back of his head. "I'm okay with that. But only if Juvia can come with us."

Once again, the new comers opened their eyes wide in surprise. Then, they all noticed Juvia, who was leaning against Gray with a contented smile on her face.

"Seriously?" Sun asked, her eyes spinning with in comprehension.

"Well, I guess you took my advice, huh?" Alfonzo asked while looking at Juvia.

"Yes, Juvia is thankful for the advice, Alfonzo." Juvia said while smiling happily. "And seeing an example of how Juvia used to act helped a lot, too."

Knowing that Juvia was talking about her encounter with Lyon, Alfonzo's smile widened.

Around that time, Edward, supporting his brother and followed by Winry, Izumi, and Sig also approached the table. However, before Edward and Alphonse could greet the returning wizards, a strange atmosphere developed between Alfonzo and Sig as they made eye contact.

Naturally, everyone in the vicinity noticed the atmosphere, causing them all to cast confused gazes at the two muscular men.

Meanwhile, Alfonzo and Sig, who maintained eye contact since the moment their eyes met, were calmly assessing the other. Despite the difference in their builds, with Alfonzo's build resembling that of an athlete, and Sig's resembling that of a bodybuilder, the two were having similar thoughts about the other.

"Such a powerful body." Sig said, admiration audible in his tone. "And such compact muscles. You've clearly worked hard."

"I could say the same about you." Alfonzo replied with a smile. "Such powerful musculature. And despite your bulk, I can tell you haven't sacrificed agility in the slightest. I'm pretty fucking impressed."

Then, both men extended their right hands simultaneously before gripping the other's hand in a firm handshake, a sign of their respect for the other's physical training.

'I wasn't expecting that.' Elicia thought to herself while her gaze shifted between Alfonzo and Sig. 'Maybe if Fonzie was big and bulky like Major Armstrong, I would have seen it coming. But Fonzie's physique is lean like a basketball player. I'm kinda disappointed Fonzie didn't take off his shirt to show off his muscles, though.'

["Easy there, old man."] Scylla said while rolling her eyes as Elicia licked her lips at the thought of Alfonzo's muscular body. ["Fonzie isn't a weirdo that takes off his clothes at every opportunity. The guild already has one too many of those, as it is."]

'Yeah, I admit Gray is more than enough for one guild.' Elicia replied while rolling her eyes. 'But you should wipe the drool on the left side of your mouth before you start calling me a pervert, Scylla.'

Immediately, Scylla's eyes opened wide from inside Elicia's inner world. Then, she quickly used the back of her left hand to wipe away the drool that Elicia mentioned before looking away with a blush.

["What drool, I don't see any."] Scylla said bashfully, gaining another eye roll from Elicia.

"Uh… Anyway, let me introduce you, Alfonzo." Edward said awkwardly before gesturing to Sig and Izumi in turn. "The one you're shaking hands with is Sig Curtis. And this is his wife, also mine and Al's teacher, Izumi Curtis."

With Edward's introduction, Alfonzo finally broke his handshake with Sig. Then, after the men nodded to each other, Alfonzo turned his attention to Izumi and once again extended his hand.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Miss Izumi." Alfonzo said with a polite smile. "You must be quite the martial artist if what I've seen from Ed and Al are any indication."

"Oh my, a young man with manners." Izumi replied with a smile. Then, she looked at Edward while maintaining that smile. "You could probably learn a thing or two from him, Ed."

"Hmph!" You wouldn't say that if you ever saw how much he likes to mess with people." Edward muttered.

"Oh, come on, Ed." Winry said with a smile. "You're just salty because you lost that bet last year."

"Shut up, Winry." Edward said in a panicked tone.

"What bet would that be?" Izumi asked, with interest sparkling in her eyes.

"It's nothing to worry about." Edward said frantically. "Anyway, I thought I heard you say something about giving the guild their cut from your job, right, Alfonzo? You really shouldn't keep Master Ur waiting."

Hearing his brother's frantic tone, Alphonse couldn't help but chuckle. Alfonzo, on the other hand, slumped his shoulders in annoyance.

"Thanks for reminding me, Ed." Alfonzo grumbled. "You just completely took the wind out of my sails."

Hearing that, everyone turned their attention to Alfonzo's dejected expression, almost feeling bad for him. Meanwhile, Edward breathed a quiet sigh of relief that everyone's attention was no longer on his lost bet.

"But Ed's right." Alfonzo said, shaking off his annoyance for the moment. "I'll go talk to Ur and give her the guild's cut. After that, I'm heading home. Girls, you should get ready to leave, too. I'll be cooking once we get back and we're gonna have guests."

In response, Elicia, Erza, Mirajane, and Sun nodded before they started getting ready to go back to the mansion.

On a side note, Cana, Ultear, Marin, and Lucy were already back at the mansion. Since they knew Alfonzo would be coming back today, they decided to wait for him at home. On top of that, Marin and Lucy had invited Brandish and Irene to have dinner with them. So, they wanted to be there in case they showed up before Alfonzo got home.

"I guess the rest of you should head over to my place, too." Alfonzo said to the rest of the people surrounding the usual table. "We can celebrate Natsu and Lisanna, and Gray and Juvia getting together. Plus, we can welcome Miss Izumi and Mr. Sig, as well."

Immediately, Laki, Levy, Jet, Droy, Gray, Elfman, Lisanna, Natsu, Happy, Juvia, Gajeel, and Panther Lily cheered excitedly. Meanwhile, the other wizards of the guild looked at those who were cheering with envy.

And while the others were cheering, Alfonzo smiled before walking towards the elevator. Then, just after hitting the call button, he turned around and looked at Elicia.

"Oh, and Lici, you should show that one picture to Miss Izumi and Mr. Sig." Alfonzo said with a sadistic smile. "I'm sure they'd love to see Ed during his time of self-discovery."

Hearing that, Elicia's eyes lit up. She loved nothing more than showing off her creations. Edward, on the other hand, paled rapidly. Especially since he knew exactly what picture Alfonzo was talking about. Meanwhile, Erza, Mirajane, Sun, and Winry did their best to stifle their laughter, as they were also present when the picture in question was taken.

Around the same time the elevator doors opened, Elicia nodded vigorously. Then, she started leading everyone towards the guild hall's doors.

"Oh, and Al." Alfonzo said as he stepped into the elevator. "If you don't mind waiting, you can ride back with me. I know it must be a struggle to get around on those crutches."

"Thanks, I think I'll take you up on that offer, Alfonzo." Alphonse replied with a nod and a grateful smile.

"Then, I'll wait here with Al." Edward said nervously.

"No, I think you should come with us, Ed." Izumi said with a friendly smile as her hand clamped down on Edward's shoulder, a sign that she would not be taking no for an answer.

At the same time, the Elevator doors closed, and Edward caught sight of Alfonzo's malicious smile.

'Hmph! That will teach you to bring up things I'd rather not think about.' Alfonzo thought to himself as the elevator started to ascend.

A few moments later, Alfonzo arrived on the top floor, where he found Ur, Gildarts, Wendy, and Carla, with the latter two reporting on a quest they just completed. Then, after talking with the quartet for a few minutes, during which, Alfonzo handed over the guild's cut from his last job, he invited all four of them to have dinner at his place along with all the others. An offer the four wasted no teim accepting.