An Alternative Timeline

*Author Note*

Some people asked me to make a pat reon, so I made a pat reon:

patr eon.com/Maerry

*End of Author Note*

Hisoka trembled in fear when powerful battle intent washed over her like a tsunami.

'Damn, I messed up. I seriously messed up! But it's not like I could have kept quiet about it, so what else was I supposed to do?!'

Hisoka's demise started after Yuna finished her battle evaluation. Sai parted ways with them, and at the same time, Yuna, Karin, and Hisoka walked towards the Uzumaki compound, so Hisoka could tell Yuna, Hinata, and Anko what she knew about this world.

While telling the whole story to them, Hisoka got all kinds of reactions from the trio. When Hisoka described the personality of the original Naruto, Yuna shook her head in disbelief, while Hinata and Anko looked at Yuna in gratitude. They felt that having someone with that kind of personality around would be incredibly annoying and had no doubt that Yuna played a significant role in averting that crisis.

Following their reaction to the original Naruto, Hisoka couldn't help but tell them about the original Hinata and how she had a crush on Naruto, resulting in Hinata doing a spit-take. At the same time, Anko fell to the ground while holding her stomach because she was laughing too hard, while Yuna barely managed to hold in her own laughter.

After everyone calmed down, Hinata gave Yuna a grateful look. Although Naruto certainly played some part in helping her become more confident, it was apparent for Hinata that without Yuna, she would still be the shy girl that couldn't even speak a complete sentence without stuttering that Hisoka told them about.

Next, Hisoka revealed the weird relationship Naruto and Sasuke had. Yet again, Anko almost suffocated due to laughing too hard, while Yuna and Hinata had wry smiles on their faces.

"What a sad timeline. Hinata has a crush on Naruto, but Naruto has a crush on Sasuke. Their relationship was just about to bloom, but suddenly Sasuke leaves Naruto for Orochimaru. How tragic. Well, that at least explains why Sasuke made the stupid decision to go to Orochimaru. I wonder what part of Orochimaru he found so attractive? Probably the long tongue, huh."

This time it was Hisoka's turn to do a spit-take while she was franticly trying to prevent unhealthy images from popping up in her mind.

On a side note, Yuna almost had a stroke when Hisoka told her that the original Naruto needed a shadow clone and both hands to form a Rasengan, which, considering Minato created it to be used one-handed, completely goes against its purpose.

"IF YOU NEED TO USE BOTH HANDS TO FORM THE TECHNIQUE, THEN YOU MIGHT AS WELL USE A NORMAL JUTSU!!!"

This was the first, but certainly not the last, time that Yuna's screams of irritation echoed over the Uzumaki compound that day.

The next part of the story was rather mundane. Naruto left the village for three years to train with Jiraiya. A few more things happened in Konoha during that period, but Hisoka barely remembered any of them and dismissed them as "annoying fillers". Yuna decided to ignore the comment despite finding it slightly weird.

Anyway, the story continued, and three years later, Naruto returned to Konoha pretty much as strong as he previously was. Now, with the added benefit of going into a Kyuubi-based rampage every time Sasuke's name is mentioned and the ability to form a slightly bigger Rasengan, which, by the way, still needed the support of a shadow clone to be used.

"WHAT THE HELL HAVE YOU BEEN DOING FOR THREE F*ING YEARS, JIRAIYA!!!"

That's right, in Yuna's opinion, the one responsible was Jiraiya. The original Naruto was an idiot, so it would be weird to make him accountable for messing up like that, but Jiraiya was a different case. He might be a pervert, but he was still a skilled shinobi, so Naruto not improving for three years could only be his fault.

"Damnit, bonding with Naruto is fine and all, since Naruto never had a family up to that point in time, but he should have at least spent some time actually training Naruto. Should I go and beat him up? No, that's unreasonable since it was in another timeline...Should I do it anyway?"

Hearing Yuna ominously talking to herself, Hinata, Anko, and Hisoka pretended like they were just part of the room decoration. A short while later, the dark aura surrounding Yuna vanished, and Hisoka could continue her tale.

The next part of the story that caught Yuna's interest was Hidan, a supposedly immortal person. Someone even chopped off his head, and after sewing it back on, he was good to go again. Yuna was rather curious about how that person's body worked and was looking forward to meeting him.

Some more things happened. Naruto's hope to get his *cough*boy *cough*friend back was rekindled by Sasuke killing Orochimaru, but Sasuke decided that he would instead go full retard and hunt down Itachi. Luckily for him, Itachi already had one foot in the grave, was almost blind, and was only standing straight without falling over due to sheer willpower alone, so Sasuke barely managed to squeeze out a victory.

After realizing that Itachi sacrificed everything he had to protect him and Konoha, Sasuke concluded that his next goal would be the destruction of Konoha. A decision that caused Yuna, Hinata, and Anko to perform a synchronized facepalm.

Another exciting thing that happened was that some weirdo with a god complex and two Rinnegan appeared in Konoha to wreak havoc. At first, Yuna was somewhat surprised that so many people in Konoha died. When Naruto, somehow, managed to convince the person who killed these people in the first place to sacrifice himself to resurrect everyone he killed, Yuna almost coughed out blood in anger.

"WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR IDEOLOGY!? DON'T DO A 180 JUST BECAUSE YOU HAD A FIVE-MINUTE CONVERSATION WITH SOMEONE. WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR PAIN!?"

Anyway, a while later, Sasuke killed Danzo, had another lovers-quarrel with Naruto in which Naruto declared that they would die together. A bit later, Sakura decided to go full retard as well, declared her love for Naruto, and then decided to kill Sasuke on her own, which was beyond impossible.

However, Sasuke felt challenged by Sakura's idiocy and decided to top it by doing something even stupider, so he decided to attack the Five Kage all by himself, which resulted in him thoroughly getting his stuffing beaten out of him.

Madara, or rather Obito, appeared when Sasuke was about to die and rescued him while declaring war against the world.

Anyway, war happened. The whole world was fighting a bunch of weird-looking, white clones and a bunch of reanimations. Yuna wondered what Obito's plan was if Kabuto didn't support those weird-ass clones with the Edo Tensei but decided to ask him personally when she saw him the next time.

And then, Hisoka said, what she shouldn't have said.

"Did you just say that Madara got reanimated as well?! And that he was pretty much at full power when it happened!?"

Yuna's battle intent flooded the Uzumaki compound as her face twisted in glee.

Seeing the expression on Yuna's face, Hisoka's face paled.

'She w-wouldn't purposely accelerate the story just to fight Madara, would she?'

Hisoka gave Yuna's face another glance, and seeing the glint of insanity in Yuna's eyes caused her to pale even further.

'I think I f*ed it up, again.'