Never Been This Sure
*Theia's POV*
"RF is right foot. LF is left foot."
Kanina ko pa yun pinapaulit ulit yun sa utak ko.
"Bessy, are you sure about this?"
"Oo naman, bessy!" Lumapit ako para bumulong sa kanya. "Tignan mo sila. Ako lang walang kaalam alam dito oh."
It's true.
Kanina pa nagsisimula yung mga kaklase namin habang wala akong maintindihan. I tried copying their steps pero ewan ko ba.
Hindi sumusunod yung paa ko.
Kinuha ko nalang muna si Charm para turuan ako mag-isa.
Ang gagaling narin sumayaw nila Ry.
Partner pa nga sila ni Ivy.
Hindi ba sila naiilang? Lalo na't ang lapit lapit nila sa isa't isa?
Akala ko nga si Nate na yung partner niya.
Speaking of him, wala pa siya.
"Pwede naman natin gawin sa bahay mamaya."
"Bakit mamaya pa? Kaya nga may practice para ngayon ko na gawin."
"Sige na nga. Ready ka na?"
I nodded.
I'm desperate. Kahit wala akong partner, sasayaw ako mag-isa.
"Okay, so this is the basic step. Actually lahat naman dito lang nag sisimula e." Sabi niya. "Just follow my lead, bessy."
Charm started teaching. Ginagawa niya din yung sinasabi niya kaya nakakasunod ako.
"Step back with RF."
Right.
"Step back with LF and should be parallel to your right."
Left.
"Bring the RF to the LF."
Right to left.
"Step forward with the LF."
Left.
"Step forward with the RF and should be parallel to left foot."
Right.
"Bring the LF to the RF."
Left to Right.
"The Box yung tawag kaya parang gumagawa ka ng box." She said and stopped. "Repeat those steps while counting one to three."
"One, two, three?"
She nodded.
"Okay.."
One, two, three.
One, two, three.
One, two, three.
One, two, three.
Biglang pumalakpak si Charm.
"Very good, Bessy!"
"Tama ba yung ginawa ko?"
Mukha kasing mali.
"Oo naman."
"Talaga??"
Parang hindi ako naniniwala.
"Bakit? May problema ba?"
"I'm not getting used to it." Sagot ko.
"Kasi ikaw lang yung sumasayaw mag-isa?"
I nodded.
"Sorry, bessy." Sabi niya. "Hindi ko kasi kaya yung steps ng panglalaki."
She was smiling.
Pero bakit?
Hindi parin tapos yung mga nasa likod namin. Papatulong sana ako kay Ry.
"Okay lang. Pagkatapos nalang nila." Sagot ko. "I'll ask Ry---"
"I'll help."
Huh? Boses niya yun diba?
Siya kaya..?
I turned and saw him.
Si Nate nga.
"Sure ka, Nathan?" Tanong ni Charm.
"Basic step lang ba?"
He was already beside me.
Totoo ba talaga to?
"Yep. Unless gusto mo dagdagan ng iba..?"
Nilakihan ko ng mata si Charm.
Ano bang ginagawa mo??
-Tumahimik ka nalang, bessy.-
Seryoso ka ba dito?
She winked at me na parang sinasabing,
-"Trust me."-
"Ehem."
Nate offered his hands to me.
"Si-sigurado ka ba..?"
Baka caught in the moment lang siya.
Mamaya pagsisihan niya rin 'to.
He raised his eyebrow at me.
"Kasi.. si Ivy.."
Bakit feeling ko, ako yung gumagawa ng masama kahit si Ivy naman yung totoong may ginagawa?
"Hindi ko rin alam pero.." He almost whispered. "I've never been this sure in my life.."
What does that mean?
Nagulat nalang ako nung hawak hawak niya na yung kamay ko.
*So Close by Jon McLaughlin now playing*
You're in my arms
And all the world is calm
The music playing on for only two
So close together
And when I'm with you
So close to feeling alive
He was staring at me while dancing kaya hindi ko rin mapigilang titigan siya.
A life goes by
Romantic dreams must die
So I bid my goodbye
And never knew
So close, was waiting
Waiting here with you
And now, forever, I know
All that I wanted
To hold you so close
This song says so much.
I always wanted to hold him close.
Sobrang lapit niya sa'kin. Ngayon lang niya ko ulit nahawakan ng ganito.
Nahihiya akong tumitig sa kanya.
But I couldn't stop myself from looking as well.
So close to reaching
That famous happy end
Almost believing
This one's not pretend
And now you're beside me
And look how far we've come
So far we are, so close
Can you say that you're mine? Para malaman ko kung ipaglalaban pa ba kita..
Oh how could I face the faceless days
If I should lose you now
Ang hirap kasing lumaban kung wala ka na palang pinaglalaban.
We're so close to reaching
That famous happy end
Almost believing
This one's not pretend
Let's go on dreaming
For we know we are
So close, so close
And still so far
You're so close and yet so far, Nate
Nung narinig ko yung malakas na palakpakan, napabitaw kami at lumayo sa isa't isa.
They were done practicing. Pinapanuod nalang nila kaming dalawa.
"Now, that's a real couple dance." Ms. Ces commented while smiling. "You may take a break and go home, everyone. Great job!"
"Thank you, Ma'am!"
"See you all later!"
Pagkaalis ni Ms. Ces, sumunod rin si Ivy. I even saw Nate follow her.
Humarap ako kay Charm. Both hands were covering her mouth.
"At kelan ka pa natutong mag-waltz, Aletheia??"
Natawa ako sa reaksyon niya.
"I didn't."
"Yes, you did! You were amazing, Theia!" Erica was smiling. Kasunod niya na yung mga lalaki.
"Nag-aral ka na yata dati." Sabi ni Vin.
"Oo nga." Ken said. "Hindi naman pang beginner yung sinayaw niyo."
"Sus. Inggit naman kayong dalawa dyan."
"Hindi ah."
"Kaya ko din yun."
"She learned it." Ry smiled at me. "Pano niya makakalimutan kung yung taong nagturo sa kanya--"
"Si Nathan." Sabi ni Charm. "Oo nga pala."
"Anong oo nga?"
"His parents held an event before." Sagot niya. "And they needed to dance.."
Nakatitig lang ako sa kanya.
"Diba, bessy? Sa Diamond Hotel. Yung Anniversary nila Tito James at Tita Dina."
Invited nga pala kaming apat dun nila Gab. Kaya pala kahit hindi ko naiintindihan yung sinasayaw namin, it felt familiar. That was long ago. Bago pa maging kami ni Nate.
"Mineee, daan lang kami saglit sa gym."
"Sure."
"Labas narin kaya tayo?"
"Tara."
"Ang ganda niyo paring tignan ni Nathan."
Charm nodded. "You should still be partners. Don't worry, kayo naman talaga."
Parang iba yung ibig sabihin nun.
"Oh no." Erica said. "May dinner pa pala tayo mamaya. I don't think nakapili na ko ng susuotin."
"Right. Yun nga pala yung dahilan kung bakit ako dumaan sa bahay."
"Anong dinner?"
"We won the game remember?" Sabi ni Ry. "Nagpareserve si Ms. Ces sa favorite nyang restaurant to celebrate."
"Don't tell me wala ka pang damit??"
Nginitian ko lang si Charm.
"Diba sinabihan kita kagabi??"
"Hehe.."
"Argh." Hindi na maipinta yung mukha niya. "Halika na nga! Erica, Ry, later! Ingat kayo!"
"Ingat din kayo. Byee!"
***
"Uy, bessy.."
Nasa sasakyan na kami nung may naalala ako.
"Ano?" Tinaasan ba naman ako ng kilay.
Galit parin 'to dahil sa damit. Nako.
"Akala mo hindi ko napansin."
"Ang alin?"
"Na nagsinungaling ka." I said. "You said you didn't know the steps for men. Nakita kitang tinuturuan sila pagdating ko kanina."
She chuckled. "Napansin mo pala?"
"Oo naman."
"Very good, bessy!"
"Kanina pa ba siya nandun?"
Lingon kasi siya ng lingon kanina habang nagtuturo sa'kin.
"Uh-huh. I was actually watching him simula nung dumating siya." Sagot niya. "Kaya I pretended not to know the steps para lumapit siya at tulungan ka."
"Bakit mo naman naisip na lalapit siya?" I looked at her. "Nandun kaya si Ivy."
"Sa'yo kasi siya nakatingin at hindi sa kanya." She said. "He was staring at you the whole time, bessy."
Parang ibang tao nga siya kanina.
"Ang galing ko diba?" Sabi niya. "Nakakamiss na makita kayong ganun sa totoo lang. I remembered how inseparable you were.."
Natahimik nalang ako.
"I don't know kung tama ako ng napansin ha." Charm said while looking at me. "When you were dancing with him, yung tingin niya sa'yo. He was looking at you like.. like he loves you. Alam mo yun? Yung tingin ng Mio mo."
Sa totoo lang, ganun din yung pakiramdam ko habang sumasayaw kami.
"Kaya siguro ganun din yung naramdaman ni Erica." Pagtuloy niya. "At sa tingin ko, yun din yung nakita ni Ivy kaya siya nag walked out."
Nung bigla niyang sinundan niya si Ivy, nalungkot ako.
He chose her over me.
"If you knew na alam ko yung steps, there's also a possibility na alam din yun ni Nathan." Sabi niya. "Then why did he approached us?"
He didn't even hesitated na lapitan kami.
Tapos yung sinabi niya pa kanina...
"I've never been this sure in my life."
"Are you really sure that want to give up on him, bessy?" She asked. "Kasi nararamdaman kong may ipaglalaban ka pa."
It made me stare at her. Kasi yung tanong ko sa sarili ko kanina, sinagot niya.
Can you say that you're mine? Para malaman ko kung ipaglalaban pa ba kita.
If I did want to, will you let me fight for you, Nate?
Kasi deep inside, ayaw ko paring isuko ka.
******
*Alec's POV*
*Charm calling*
"Kuya??? Oh god, buti nalang sumagot ka."
"Charm??"
"Kuya, si Theia.."
"What happened to her??"
"Na-nahimatay siya.."
"Whaat??!" Hindi na siya pwedeng mawalan ulit ng malay. "Anong nangyari?? Akala ko ba nasa restaurant kayo??"
Kumuha ako ng jacket sa cabinet.
"We were but before it started, nag-usap sila ni Ry." Sabi niya. "I don't know what happened. Pagkakita ko sa kanya, hindi na siya makahinga."
"May tao ba dyan? May tumulong ba sa inyo??"
Sh*t. I'm panicking.
"Wala pa. Ikaw ang una kong tinawagan, Kuya."
I grabbed my car keys from the drawer and ran downstairs.
"Charm, are you okay?"
She was catching her breath.
"I don't know what to do, Kuya." Her voice was shaking. "Natatakot ako."
"You have to calm down, Charm." Sabi ko. "Please, ikaw lang ang kasama niya ngayon. Please kayanin mo."
"Yes." Sagot niya. "Anong gagawin ko, Kuya?"
"Hijo, aalis ka?"
"Yes, Nang. May nangyari daw po kay Theia." Sagot ko. "Charm, you need to call for help. Masyado akong malayo sa inyo. Uminom ba si Theia ng gamot niya?"
"I don't think so."
"Sh*t."
Nakalimutan niya yung meds niya.
I shouldn't have let her go.
"MAY TAO BA DYAN??! HELP US!! PLEASEE!!!"
"Anong nangyari sa kanya??"
Boses niya yun.
"Theia??? Theia, wake up!!"
"Theia, can you hear me??" He said. "Dadalhin ka namin sa ospital, okay??"
I'm sure it's him.
"Hello? Kuya??"
"Charm, I'm here."
"Papunta na kami sa ospital."
"I don't know kung naka-duty si Tita. If she is, you need to tell her what happened." I said. "Don't drop the call. Papunta na 'ko."
"Yes, Kuya."
"Please, Charm." I'm pleading. "Stay with her."
"I will, Kuya. I promise."
I'm dying here. I can't lose my sister. Never ako magiging ready to be an only child.
Not Theia please.
******