Ch104. Suna/Iwa front 3

Rei, Konan, and Mei joined ten squads under Kitsuha's order that were supposed to travel through the upper part of the Land of the Wind towards the borders where an army of Iwa mercenaries and cannon fodder should be waiting.

This was the web the Mizukage spun. Iwa pushing the stalemate in the Land of Grass while also attacking through the Land of Wind, going into the Land of Rivers where the Konoha didn't expect its borders to be breached due to the proverbial 'shield' the Land of Wind provided. Kumo was expected to keep Konoha busy on the Kumo front... and then Kiri ninjas go into offensive on the northern shores of the Land of Fire without being noticed while the southern shores are busy with erratic hired pirates. Even Rei could only bitterly smile at how well the Mizukage's plan went despite his intervention on the Nagori Isles. It was really baffling and a great show of Mizukage's smarts and his ability as a tactician. Coupled with the upcoming mission of the team Downpour in the Land of Fire, Konoha would have no time to react to the real assault in the northern shores of their territory. Rei doubted they would realize that the northern shore was the location of the real attack until it was too late.

The following days spent traveling towards the borders was a pure annoyance in Rei's opinion and he was fairly sure Konan also had thoughts of lighting the camp on fire whenever they stopped for a night. Since Mei found out this was an incredibly badly veiled ruse, there was no longer a need to keep much of a pretense of politeness with the Iwa ninjas that would inevitably end up on the other end of his kunai one of these days. Mei passed her test so as long as Rei's actions didn't make their tag-along group wary, he decided not to act friendly towards them only to throw Mei off.

Rei knew Konan was fed-up with rebuffing two moronic guys who tried to win her over with their 'dashing' looks as if it wasn't obvious they were a part of Iwa's seduction corps. The idiots didn't even try to change their mannerisms from that of a high-end man-slut.

To be honest, he was too bored with the Iwa kunoichi trying to flirt with him. By his estimation two of the squads traveling with them, that means ten people, were from the seduction corps and ten of these were a quite beautiful kunoichi. Well, beauty is good and all but when one knows that sticking into it means being stuck by kunai in exchange, no matter if that kunai is from the Iwa kunoichi or Konan, it was just not worth it. Needless to say, Rei made sure that Konan was extremely 'vocal' of her 'feelings' during their nights... just to show how exasperated he was by the flimsy flirty attempts. Poor Mei had to use silencing seals to sleep. Unfortunately for her, Konan declared it was training to be familiar with sex and not act shy when witnessing it... Rei totally had no chance but to comply with that, right?

Neither Konan nor Rei had any idea why the Tsuchikage deemed it important for these guys from the seduction corps to be here. Well, they did have an idea. Maybe he wanted to see if there is a way to 'convert' their loyalties? For them to be manipulated and somehow controlled by lust? It wouldn't be the first time a dangerous S-ranker was a horndog who could be either easily killed by a prostitute or promised to have a harem for his services. Every man had his price and Rei thought Onoki was trying to shoot blindly to find theirs in a 'maybe' scenario.

At least, they didn't go for Mei, and for that Rei was grateful. It would be so awkward explaining to her the 'finer' divisions of Ninja Villages. He was aware Konan explained sex in great detail to Mei... and when Tsunade pitched in, to his unquenchable horror, Rei was sure Mei knew every little thing he loved in bed. Something he didn't forget to punish both Tsunade and Konan as Mei started looking differently at him after that particular debate with her older 'sisters'. But despite that, he knew neither of the women in his life deemed it important to explain what seduction corps was and he was definitely not the one who would have that kind of debate with the girl. Nu-uh.

On the brighter side, Kitsuha was an utter disappointment and Rei was now quite certain the Tsuchikage wanted his youngest son to die on this mission. Rei's thinking process was simple. If Rei was Kage and had a son like Kitsuha, he would also want him to die as soon as possible and stop embarrassing him. Oh, how the guy bragged when piss drunk. About this and that insignificant accomplishment. About how Kiri ninjas were insignificant pussies... in front of Kiri shinobi at that, about how he would 'spank' Konoha's ass after he accomplished a special mission from his father and made him proud. Well, Rei was actually surprised the guy had the decency to not blurt out his special mission was to kill the Team Downpour in an ambush. Point for the guy, he guessed. Nevertheless, Rei promised Kitsuha would get a very painful end, if only due to the way he looked at HIS Konan. Nothing short of being boiled alive would suffice...

And then the guy started droning on and on for hours upon hours about his nightly conquers of the kunoichi from the seduction corps whose only reason for being present in this squad was to seduce Rei... not be sluts for their 'Commander'. Alas, the guy was still their commander so tough luck for them. The more the moron talked, the more annoyed Rei became, the more kunai-happy his hand twitched. The worst part? The guy just wouldn't shut up... and he would always follow Rei to talk. At times, Rei wondered if Tsuchikage was some grand schemer and this was some elaborate scheme to prolong the time he spent with Kitsuha in order to make the trash he spewed infect Rei and make him go insane or possibly die before they even reached the ambush point. It was certainly a very distinct possibility and with every passing day, Rei became more and more assured of this theory of his. The Tsuchikage was scary...

That's why, on the afternoon of the sixth day of traveling with Kitsuha, Rei was incredibly happy when his natural senses started tingling and his eyes snapped forward, widening slightly. He looked at Konan who grimly nodded at him, signalizing she also noticed it. But heck... not even the realization of what exactly was waiting for his team couldn't wipe away the happiness he felt at finally getting away from the boasting chatterbox.

"Halt!" Kitsuha self-importantly ordered, almost puffing in pride, inwardly almost squealing that his hour of glory was almost upon him. The Seduction Corps women didn't manage to do their mission and seduce Rei nor did their male counterparts have any progress with Konan who during the entire journey utterly ignored them, not speaking even a word to them. "Rei, it was very brief but we will have to wait here for a messenger. The best and fastest way to get to Konoha would be through the mountain pass in front of us. I wish you the best of luck, my friend!" Kitsuha boisterously ushered the Team Downpour to continue forward with his words.

Rei sighed and wondered if Kitsuha was really as stupid as he seemed. This didn't reek of a trap at all... The small straight road with two jagged tall cliff-like mountains towering on each side of it seemed totally safe. The walls were jagged enough that even attempting surface-walking would be something insane and would most likely result in getting mortally injured on the sharp rocks rather than walking the surface upward. Any self-respecting ninja would never walk into such a good location for a trap and would rather go around the mountain just to avoid this on the off-chance of there being an ambush despite taking the detour took much longer.

Konan actually facepalmed.

Mei, on the other hand, was blinking as she stared at the road, her mind completely blank, not being able to comprehend what she just heard. The talk about what kind of places to 'not' go was among the first lessons she received and the path in front of her seemed to be awfully like those at the very top of that list. 'This... they are kidding, right? They must be, right? I mean, I am a genin and they should be jonin... That means they should be smarter or at least more experienced, right? They can't really expect us to just walk in there, right? Don't tell me they chose such a textbook place for an ambush... that would need for one to be as dense as a rock! Nobody is that dense, right?' Mei thought in turmoil at the ridiculous situation she found herself in.

Kitsuha's orders were to walk into the mountain path with the Team Downpour. It wouldn't be really suspicious if he did so and explained they already secured and scouted this place. In the hurry, the Team Downpour was supposed to not pay much attention to it and when the people waiting on the other end blocked one of the paths, Kitsuha's ten squads were supposed to block the other path out, trying to prevent the Team Downpour from fleeing long enough for their helpers to flood the narrow path, using their numbers to overwhelm Team Downpour. Easy plan. Alas, Kitsuha had to decide not to listen to orders and 'advised' Rei to go through the path alone which made it very obvious this was a trap.

Rei just sadly shook his head, giving up on trying to find a shred of intelligence in Kitsuha. "Let's go." He simply said with an apathetic and disappointed shrug and led his team into a clearly obvious trap. A plan on how to deal with this ridiculous situation already at the forefront of his mind, his lips twisted into a nasty smirk aimed at Mei, making her shudder as she was now well aware this was yet another test and a way of how to make her stronger.

'Oh... this will be such a pain in the ass, won't it!' She groaned to herself.

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Author Note:

Okay, before someone flames me that I make Iwa being stupid on purpose, I am not. I am making Kitsuha stupid and this was somewhat of his operation. The place for an ambush was good but he was supposed to walk inside WITH Rei and co and then spring a trap.

Remember, nobody except the Mizukage should be aware of the flight ability (Ringo told him, of course) and their sensing ability (He has no idea to what extent though) so thinking this could stop the Team Downpour was totally normal

As for what 'THIS' is, it will be revealed in the next chapter :D.