Panic attack?

*Oh my god

Tyler is soooo gonna kill me if he finds me with his car.

"Lucy?" I tried calling her for the billionth time looking at her then at the road again.

"Lucy why are you staring at me like that?" I asked as she was staring at me with wide eyes open.

"Why did you have to run away." This time it was Lucy who spoke. 

    What?

"What?" I asked confused.

"Why did you have to run away?" She asked again. I glanced briefly at her before turning my head to look at the road.

"Why did you have to kill me?"

"I'm sorry." I said as tears began to fall from my eyes.

"It's all your fault!"

"I'm sorry."

"It's all your fault!!"

"I'm so sorry."

"It's all your fault!!!"

"I'm so s-" I was interuppted by a bright light blinding me and before I knew it, it was crashing into us and I screamed.*

     I woke up with a jerk and rushed to my bathroom to puke.

    Great. Another fucking nightmare.

     I brushed my teeth and went back to my room. My bedside clock read 6:55am. I walked to my mirror to look at my reflection. The nightmare had drained my strength and I looked extra gloomy today.

     Great.

  My eyes were duller than usual, my pale skin paler and I had eyebags. My lips were also dry. 

     Must be nightmare taking it's toll on me.

   I thought as I went to shower. I came out of the shower and I got dressed and applied minimal makeup. I used concealer to hide my eyebags. what would I have done without my concealer?

You will probably look like a walking dead.

So true. I used mascara to try to make my eyes look a little bright and lip gloss for my dry lips.

"I think I need a haircut." I thought aloud as I put my brush through hair. It was difficult to pack my hair or comb it and I think cutting it would make life easier for me.

  As if.

     The next five minutes, I was ready and I went downstairs for breakfast. No one is currently home. My mom travelled to Paris for a business trip and isn't coming home for a few weeks, my dad comes home late and goes to work early so I don't see him much and my brother, in his own world.

   Few minutes later, I heard a knock on the door and knowing it was probably Christian, I grabbed my bag and my keys and went to meet him.

"Oi mate." Christian greeted me with a smile as I opened the door.

"Hi" I replied dryly as I came outside and turned to lock the door and his smile dropped.

"What's wrong panda?" He asked worriedly and rolled my eyes at his nickname.

"You are not going to stop with the nickname are you?" I asked as we neared his car.

"That's a real fancy way of avoiding my question panda." He said as he opened the door for me. I muttered a quick thanks before I entered as  butterflies filled my stomach at the gesture.

"So?" He asked as he entered the car and started it.

"So what?"

"So what's wrong?" He asked with a hint of worry.

"Nothing."

"You sure?"

"Yes I'm sure Christian so drive!" I snapped at him.

"You're the boss." He said dryly and drove.

     Dammit I did it again.

   We drove in silence and when we drove to school, he got down, ran to my side, and opened the door for me and I blushed.

"Thanks."

"No p"

"I'm sorry."

"No p" He said and he walked me to my locker. Few people were looking at us mostly girls and they were mostly glaring at me.

"So what are you having first?" Christian asked resting on the locker beside mine as I opened my locker.

"Maths, why?"

"Guess what?"

"What?"

"I'll walk you to class."

"You don't have to." I muttered quietly.

"I want to." He deadpanned.

"Okay?" I said as I closed my locker.

"Let's go." He said and we started walking to my class.

"So what happened back there, does it happen a lot?" Christian asked as he broke the silence.

"What?" I asked confused.

"What happened in the car."

"Oh. Not really. It's only frequent around this time of the year."

"This time around the year? What do you mean?" He asked confused.

     Great now I've said too much.

"Nothing."

"Now we are back to nothing." He said and I stayed silent.

"Thanks for walking me." I said as we reached my class.

"No p." With that he turned to  walk away.

"Why do you keep on saying 'no p' like it's nothing!" I snapped at him and I felt a really terrible headache coming up.

"Because it's nothing." He did shrug as if it's nothing and I just glared at him and walked into my class

.....

  The day went by fast and now I had been waiting for Christian for the past two hours because he had basketball practice.

  Yes, he plays basketball and I was surprised when he told me.

"Hey." I heard someone whisper in front me and I raised my head from the book I was reading to see who it was.

"Hi" I greeted Christian.

"Did I keep you long?"

"Nah. Just two hours. No biggie." I said with sarcasm dripping from my voice and he smiled.

"Okay let's go." He said as if he didn't notice my sarcasm and I stood up. I greeted Mrs Peterson goodbye on my way out but she prefers being called Mrs p.

"So how was practice?"

"It was cool." He said and silence filled the air again.

"I'm sorry about earlier."

"No worries. And I'm sorry if my 'no p's' irritated you." He said and I smiled.

"Hey, why don't you drive us home today." He said and he threw his keys at me as we got to his car and the smile on my face immediately disappeared.

     What?

"What?" I asked as I caught the keys.

"You said you could drive right?"

"Yeah?"

"Then drive us home." He said and he opened the driver's door for me.

   A wave of deja vu hit me as the memory of that night was coming to me.

"No no no no no no no." I started to move back.

"Ash?" Christian called to me but I couldn't hear him.

   It was dark and I didn't know where the fuck we were. The rain was falling heavily making it harder to see.

"No no no no"

    The flash of lights blinding me.

"It's all my fault. It's all my fault. It's all my fault " I repeated still moving back.

"Ash?" He called

"It's all my fault. It's all my fault. It's all my...."

  Suddenly, the weather became cold and I found it hard to breathe, my throat became dry and I was starting to have chest pain. My throat being dry felt as if it was being choked. My stomach was hurting and I wanted to puke. Despite feeling cold, I was sweating profusely.

"Ash? Ash? Ashley?" Christian called as he came near to me and I continued finding it hard to breathe.

"Shit! You are having a panic attack. Shit." He said with fear in his eyes.

    Panic attack?