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Review Detail of Love_C_raft in Happier Than Ever System

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Love_C_raft
Love_C_raftLv141mthLove_C_raft

it needs improvements, there are almost no characters interaction and when it does it seems like 3rd person pov instead of mc, and you need to correct who is talking. plus saying out loud and inner thoughts, everything is very simple, no depths. the improvement you can make more dialogue between characters, and pov changes, you need to differentiate between changing scenes event and ongoing thoughts, English seem okay good luck.

Happier Than Ever System

fiifi_stunner

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fiifi_stunner
fiifi_stunnerนักเขียนfiifi_stunner

I appreciate your review and going forward I'll try to correct that.