Your attention to details are really nice. there is plentiful imagery to set a tone for the following action, interesting as it sounds if does at moments feel a bit too descriptive. I find that issue in my own writing so, I can't say what needs to be averted, but i personally like descriptions a lot, small details, sounds, action and emotions. I liked your writing, and I wish you best, please continue writing with as much vigor and joy as you did in the beginning. It shows.
ZenMaverick
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