VamPyr00

I really tried to read this due to the lack of good TDG fanfics; but I just couldn't read past Chapter 10 or 11. It's a decent story if you are a Nie Li fan but the MC is just so disappointing I couldn't continue. I hope my review doesn't deter your future writing, as I am just being true to my opinion. Either way, here is my review: WRITING QUALITY: 4* --There were few grammatical errors and mostly only syntax issues. I also considered the multiple misspelled names under this category. Thankfully, it didn't read like a Chinese translation; so that was a plus. STABILITY OF UPDATES: 5* --To be honest, I didn't even check this and always just give 5 stars bc I don't really care. STORY DEVELOPMENT: 3* --I stopped reading at chapter 11 but up to that point it is basically just an exact retelling of the Canon events. The only real difference is that the MC tries to take part of Nie Li's spotlight by copying him and taking parts of his roles. In the end, it feels too forced; as it's really unrealistic for a normal guy to take on this role, regardless of his metaknowledge. --For example: MC copies a lot of the dialogue Nie Li uses in Canon for the opening scenes in the classroom, MC takes Nie Li's place to heal Xiao Ning'er and gain her affection, and other things like this; that he basically just copies what Nie Li did in Canon with no originality. CHARACTER DESIGN: 1* --Where to even begin...the MC's background (from his original world) is a common neglected kid and was eventually an intern at some random business; but none of it was fleshed out or explained. --When he transmigrates into the body of Zhu Xiangyun, he immediately sympathizes with Nie Li and is basically just a fanboy; who decides that Ziyun and Nie Li belong together. Despite this, he wants to take PART of the spotlight (not all, bc he's a fanboy) from Nie Li and become the true 'main character' and leader of their little group of 'friends' (despite never meeting them before). --The problem is, he doesn't have any knowledge to back up any of his claims or bolstering. As such, he basically just pretends he knows things and becomes the 'leader' of the group by sheer forced plot mechanisms. He still has to defer to Nie Li in almost everything, so he's barely better than a simpering follower. --When Nie Li gives him a cultivation technique, he begs him for a better one but can't handle the pain it puts him through. In the end, he actually winds up injured and dual cultivating with Nie Li to 'share the burden' (which is actually hilarious imo). This is before he even reached Silver Rank! As a cultivator, he is absolute trash; with no strong willpower or resolve. After he gets injured, he even states that he's scared to continue cultivating. --I would understand the lack of resolve — as a person originally from our world — when cultivating a technique that causes self-harm, if that were the only problem. Unfortunately, after the MC recovers, he still pretends to be the 'leader' of the group and basically acts like nothing happened. --At chapter 10 or 11 (just before I stopped reading), the MC fought against Nie Li in a 'spar' that ended up getting 'serious'. At the time, Nie Li was 1 Star Bronze rank; while the MC was 4 Star Bronze. The result? An extremely forced 'draw' where they were both apparently 'about to kill each other'. A regular guy with almost no fighting experience and barely any cultivation...fighting a 500+ year old monster cultivator to a draw — with almost no advantage in cultivation level. Utter nonsense. --To add insult to injury, he not only simps for Nie Li but ALSO Xiao Ning'er. The dude basically falls in love with her and is extremely enamored upon seeing her for the first time in class; claiming that 'she would be his wife, she just didn't know it yet'. It's just like how Nie Li pines after Ziyun; but even WEIRDER since he'd never even met the girl before — even in his past life! How do you fall in love with someone you've only read about upon SEEING her (not talking to her) for the first time? --Basically, he's like a sh*tty Nie Li 2.0; with no cheat-like knowledge, experience, or skills to back up his bluster; and no meaningful attachment to ANY of the characters. His character isn't at all consistent with his background, he is arrogant, and he has some kind of inferiority complex to Nie Li (understandable but not fun to read about); not to mention his strange obsession with a 13/14 year old girl (Ning'er). --Overall, the character is utter trash imo. WORLD BACKGROUND: 3* --There were definitely some errors here. If it were labeled as AU I would have just ignored it; but since it's not, I'll just deduct from the score. --The largest issue I noticed was that the Author has made Zhu Xiangyun a noble; where he was simply a commoner in Canon. It's possible I misinterpreted this, but both of his parents are apparently Gold Rank demon spiritualists; so it would make no sense for them NOT to want noble status. The family even has a decent sized property in Glory City — near the Holy Orchid Institute — that holds numerous houses and family members; and he (the Author) wrote about Xiangyun becoming the next family patriarch. --There was also a dialogue where Nie Li calls himself a 'peasant', which seems out of character since he is a Noble in Canon from the Heavenly Marks family (even if lower tiered). Either he is just trying to be really humble, or the Author made Nie Li a commoner. I don't remember the exact dialogue from Canon; so I'm not sure if he was just trying to manipulate the other party or not. --The other issues have to do with using the wrong names for numerous things throughout the story. Stuff like: Soul Force, Soul Realm, Soul Form, Soul Attribute, Black Pool Grass, Zoysia Grass, Purple Haze Grass, and other specific things (names, ingredients, inscriptions, etc.) will be constantly misnamed throughout the story. Most of the incorrect names are fairly easy to guess what they are; but it still detracts from the world building imo.

Author...you know that was utter nonsense. I don't like Nie Li as a character, but nobody can claim he is weak. He would absolutely WRECK some total noob cultivator with almost no fighting experience — like the MC. The fact that you made them 'fight to a draw' is utterly ridiculous. Nie Li can fight people a whole rank above him with sheer skill (as shown numerous times in Canon). Meanwhile, the MC was an intern at a regular business from our world before transmigrating and has almost no true fighting experience. How exactly can you explain this? The gap in cultivation isn't nearly large enough to account for this. It's just forced nonsense.

Seriously? Why even fight? MC is gonna get wrecked by Nie Li. If he doesn't, then it's just forced nonsense or plot armour. He was just a normal person in his past life, so he has almost no fighting experience. Even with a MUCH larger gap in cultivation, he would get wrecked by a 500+ year old monster cultivator like Nie Li.

Peasant? Lmao, so you upgraded Zhu Xiangyun to nobility and downgraded Nie Li to a peasant? Good job!

This guy is a massive simp, for Ning'er AND Nie Li.

Ah, so you wanted to dual cultivate with Nie Li just to make him more handsome.

I thought he JUST said he was close to the next RANK, not the next STAR? He didn't even make it to the peak of Bronze Rank yet and he's already bit*hing out? I thought he just struggled to break through to Silver Rank, but this is even worse than I thought. In the end, I think he deserves this for being too greedy and wanting a better cultivation technique without even being prepared for it at all.

Lmao, I knew the MC was a Nie Li fanboy but DUAL CULTIVATION?! With a DUDE??! Author, please just make Nie Li the MC at this point. If he can't even cultivate without Nie Li holding his hand, how does he expect to take his place as the true 'main character'? It's so pathetic that it's almost sad.