Vis7777

Very intriguing. Finally we follow a top female player in a game instead of the #1 guy. It's refreshing and the story descriptions are on point. Very excited to see where it goes.

Good stuff! A long but interesting prologue. Keep up the good work and this one is worth reading!

Overall, it's pretty good and definitely a fun read. The system isn't the most helpful or very complex but I'm still in the early stages of the story. Instead of flooding readers with a bunch of information, the author makes the smart choice to push on with the narrative. Kite is a likable protagonist. He's sympathetic, since he was thrown into a game-like world out of nowhere one day and in the body of someone who is low level. He works hard to get himself ahead and the story already has some nice lady characters if you enjoy some intimacy between characters. The only issues I had with the story were the tense changes in the middle of sentences. Most of the time, instead of using can or can't, use could or couldn't. Otherwise, I recommend the story, it's pretty good. With a little bit of editing I'm sure it'll do even better in the future.

Look, I'm biased because I wrote the book. I don't think it deserves a five star rating but if you'd check it out and let me know what you think, I would appreciate it very much.

Very good start. I liked Carla very much. Her relationship with the wolf was also cute. Sassy is good as the villain and I really didn't like her. The only issue I had with this story is that everything is only 1 line long. After reading it for a while it kinda hurts the eyes so just change that and it will read better. Carla having red eyes is nice but I wish we could get a little bit more of a description of how she looks. It works very well as a short read between classes, when there's a break at work, or you're on a commute. Also, good work!

Nice chapter!