Ah... I'm so fucking tired.
These past few days have been a pain in the ass.
The good news is, I guess I won't have to worry about the pregnancy.
I still need to keep an eye on it, but now the chances are less than 1%.
"Yawn."
Feeling a bit better now that some of the worry is off my chest.
Now that I'm sober, I can't really understand why the fuck I did that back then...
But honestly, any guy would've found it hard to resist. I mean, it started with just sticking it in, so how the hell was I supposed to hold back?
'The cherry blossoms are all blooming.'
April.
The cherry blossoms aren't fully in bloom yet, but you can see them starting to open here and there.
The school is already filled with a pink atmosphere...
Even the girls' clothes have become much more vibrant.
Thinking about it just makes me feel like shit.
Why am I the only one not happy?
Ring ring.
Then, my phone rang, which hasn't happened in a while.
Who the fuck could this be? I don't expect anyone to call.
[Kim Myung-jun]
Huh? Myung-jun is calling?
Maybe it's about setting up another group date. He said we needed to find one more person.
"Hello?"
'Hey, it's Kim Myung-jun.'
"Oh, hey."
The conversation feels awkward even over the phone.
Actually, it feels even more awkward because it's a call... If we were face-to-face, it wouldn't be this bad.
'It's not about the group date. I called because of soccer.'
"Soccer?"
I thought for sure it was about the group date.
Why the fuck is he talking about soccer now? This is making me uneasy.
'There's a sports festival in May, and we might be short on players. We need 11 players and 3 reserves, but we're short. I thought of you when they asked if I knew anyone.'
What the fuck?
I only played soccer once, why think of me?
'Are you free right now? The seniors asked if you could come if you're available.'
Free? I'm never planning to be free.
That's what I wanted to say, but...
Damn it, Myung-jun... I'm trying to set up a group date, and you're dragging me into a soccer tournament...
"Yeah... I'll go."
'Are you coming to the club room now?'
"Yeah..."
Fuck...
There are so many guys in this school, from freshmen to seniors, how can there be no one else to play?
Even if the fourth years are out, can't we find 14 players among the first, second, and third years? Does that even make sense?
"My fucking fate..."
If the seniors are calling, I have to go...
Yeah, it's better than not being called at all...
I just want a quiet, chill college life... not to bond with sweaty bros over a game of soccer...
"I'll go, I'll go..."
What choice do I have? I have to go.
Every time I think I'm lonely, fate just smacks me down with its hammer.
Lonely? Then let's make sure you're not lonely, buddy. Let's crowd you with guys, huh?
What's this bullshit...
"Hey, Jun-young! Long time no see!"
"Hello, seniors!"
And this is Joon-hyung, huh?They don't even bother remembering names!
The atmosphere in the club room... it's suffocating.
It's like a man cave, a bro's den. Not the cool kind for gaming, but the rough kind just for soccer, drinking, and more soccer.
This place is so basic, it could be used as a damn office for a small business.
"Come on, Jun-yeong, take a seat."
"Yes... yes, senior."
There are over ten guys in this cramped space... I can barely breathe!
I caught eyes with Kim Myung-jun in the corner. You bastard...
"You heard from Myung-jun, right?"
"Yes, I did."
"We need 14 players for the soccer event at the sports festival.
We were just one short."
"...Okay..."
How the hell are we just one short?
I'm pretty sure last time I counted roughly, there were more than ten guys in our department who played soccer.
"Are there really not enough people in our department?"
"Well... there are, but... some issues came up."
Issues?
A rumor from a few days ago flashed through my mind.
Something about a fight in the soccer club... I think I overheard it in passing.
What the fuck. It's not that there aren't people, they just got into a fight and now there's no one!
"Other departments sometimes fill in with girls if they're short on guys. But we have the manpower, can't just not use it, right?"
...Am I considered manpower?
Fuck... Is it because I once made a decent cross during a game?
"Don't feel pressured, man. Just think of yourself as a reserve. If nothing happens, you won't even play. The seniors will handle everything."
"Of course, if we win the prize, it'll be shared with the reserves too. Or we could all go out for a big meal together."
The prize money isn't even that much, probably just end up with a meal...
I nodded anyway.
As a third reserve, I probably won't play anyway.
But I guess they're trying to be considerate.
It's better they told me than just shoving me into the reserve spot without a word...
"Yeah... I'll do it."
"Good, good. Thanks, Jun-young."
It's Joon-hyung...
Anyway, everyone seemed relieved that the squad was complete.
They're really serious about soccer. If I mess up, my college life might as well be over.
"But, Jun-yeong."
"Yes... yes, senior."
"I heard you're looking for people for a group date."
...
The rumor's spread.
It doesn't seem like Myung-jun spread it, though.
It probably just spread as people asked if anyone wanted to join a group date...
"Yes... yes."
"Who are you doing it with? Do you know any girls?"
"Ah... yeah. A friend from high school kept pestering me to set one up..."
Suddenly, everyone was more interested than they were in soccer.
Fuck, they're more focused on this than soccer.
"Which department are they from?"
"They're from the liberal arts department..."
"Wow, Jun-yeong, didn't see you as such a player!"
Is that a compliment or an insult?
I felt myself shrink back. They wouldn't force upperclassmen into a first-year group date, right?
If they're good-looking, Yoo In-ha might not mind much... but there aren't any good-looking seniors here...
"Are they pretty?"
"Well... objectively, they seem pretty."
"Do you have a picture?"
I do have a picture in my KakaoTalk profile.
But should I show it?
What if Yoo In-ha sees me later and goes crazy, like, "Hey, that's the guy setting up the group date!"? Nah, that won't happen, right?
"Here..."
"Let's see."
A senior snatched my phone, and ten guys crowded around.
Fuck! Are they piranhas?
"Wow, she's really pretty."
"Damn, nice catch, Jun-yeong."
The club room got noisy.
This might have been a big mistake. I was sweating bullets.
I glanced at Kim Myung-jun, who quickly looked away. You!
"Jun-yeong... can I take your place?"
...What?
I was speechless. Honestly, the seniors aren't really Yoo In-ha's type. I was sweating more.
"Just kidding. We can't steal a group date from the freshmen."
Their eyes didn't look like they were joking.
They looked like hungry lions.
"If it goes well, maybe you can set up more in the future, right?"
"Yeah, yeah. If this one goes well, the second and third years from their side might get interested too."
I didn't say anything, but they were all excited.
"We need to make sure this group date is a success, right?"
"We need to find another good-looking guy besides Myung-jun.
We should make it seem like our department has plenty of good-looking guys to keep the group dates lively."
What the fuck...
Was the soccer thing just an excuse? Did they call me for the group date?
I couldn't say anything, just sweating between the seniors' excitement.
"Hey, why's it so noisy here?"
"You're here?"
Then, some female seniors and classmates came in.
How many fucking people are in this tiny room...
"What are you looking at?"
"Oh? They're talking about setting up a group date."
"A group date?"
My phone was safely returned.
The girls' attention was now on the group date.
But their looks weren't exactly friendly...
"Who's setting it up?"
"It's the freshmen. We were just checking who they're doing it with."
"Really?"
...Their expressions were a bit scary.
Well, from their perspective, it's not great.
Setting up a date with girls from another department, especially if it's just to snag the good-looking guys, could make us look bad...
"Who's organizing it?"
"It's Jun-yeong."
"Oh."
They seemed to recognize me...
Maybe they saw me during the soccer game.
The girls' stares were intimidating. I felt like I was going to die. 'Who do you think you are... setting up dates?' kind of looks. Scary.
"Why, want us to set one up for you?"
"We're third years, what group date? Grow up."
Too many people...
I felt like I couldn't breathe. This environment is too much for an introvert...
"Hello."
I was zoning out when a girl spoke to me.
Ah... it's Ju Ye-jin, from my physics class.
"Oh... hi."
Ju Ye-jin smiled and disappeared into the crowd. There was no space next to me anyway.
Suddenly, I felt a bit better. I usually only greet guys all day.
"But what about the festival? Are we doing a booth?"
"We have to. Can't skip it."
The festival...
I remember hearing it's at the end of April or early May.
The sports festival is mid-May.
But what's a festival here? Just selling food... and the most important part is which idol group shows up.
"Man, it's getting tough. Maybe it's because we're old."
"Just make the freshmen do it. Just come up with the ideas."
"Maybe we should."
...Why do I feel uneasy again?
A senior suddenly grinned.
Why are you smiling?
"Jun-yeong, are you busy?"
"...Not really..."
"Shall we get busy then?"
What's with this shitty line? It's like saying, 'Wanna rub our dicks together?'
"While preparing for the soccer tournament, you can help with the festival too, right?"
"..."
I want to cry.
I hate Kim Myung-jun.
I just want to live quietly... I swear I won't say I'm lonely again. Please, spare me...
"Let's discuss it over dinner?"
"Hey, are we drinking? I feel like drinking."
"Post it on the group chat. See who wants to join."
Dragged by a senior's arm around my shoulder, I felt like I was being milked dry...
I hate this sweaty college life...