I'm Putin

I woke up from what feels like eternal slumber, my vision started to clear but all i saw can see was darkness that stretches beyond what my sight could possibly reach.

While waiting, various information was forced into my mind.

I am Vlad, 14 years old, died of masturbating 56 times before reaching the 57.

It is apparently my time to be reincarnated into the world of-

A giant roulette wheel spins and lands on the word-

POKÉMON

The wheel spins again and grows until it becomes 2× my size and swallows me whole. Hello darkness my old friend~