Conflicted Heart

Chapter 5: Conflicted Heart

Eira felt like heavy rocks were crushing on her chest as they walked to the car. Callian had been quiet beside her, and thankfully, he was calm, comforting, but her hands were still trembling.

They sat in the backseat of the car; they both felt the awkward silence between them. 

Callian finally broke it.

"How do you feel?" he said in a soft voice, yet persistent, as he leaned forward, searching her face. "Eira, how are you feeling?"

She wanted to answer. 

Wanted to say that she was fine, that the encounter hadn't fazed her. But her hands wouldn't stop shaking, and her throat felt tight. 

She could barely breathe. The moment her lips parted, the tears came; they were unbidden and unstoppable.

"I—" her voice cracked. "I didn't think it would be this hard."

Callian moved closer, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. "Talk to me."

"I didn't expect to feel this way," she whispered, wiping at her face, though the tears kept flowing. "I hate him, Callian. I hate him so much for what he did to my mom… but seeing him like that… confused…"

Her voice broke again as she buried her face in her hands, sobbing. "Why do I feel sorry for him? I shouldn't feel sorry for him. I should hate him. I do hate him!"

Callian wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into his chest as she cried. "It's okay," he murmured into her hair. "You don't have to feel a certain way. This is hard, and it's okay to feel confused."

"I didn't know," she continued through her sobs, "I didn't know it would be this hard to meet him. The man who destroyed my mom's life. And now he has another daughter, one that he loves."

Callian rubbed her back soothingly. "Do you want to cancel the contract? We can walk away from all of this, Eira. You don't have to hurt yourself this way."

"No," she replied quickly, but still in a shaky tone. "No, I can't cancel it. I can't back down now."

Callian pulled back slightly, looking down at her tear-streaked face. "Are you sure? You're allowed to step away if it's too much."

Eira shook her head, wiping at her tears with the back of her hand. "I need to finish this, Callian. He destroyed everything for us. For my mom. And now, he's living this perfect life with a daughter that he actually acknowledges." Her voice rose. "He didn't even know who I was! How could he just forget? How could he go on like nothing happened? Like I didn't exist!"

"I can't answer that for you," Callian said gently, his thumb brushed away a tear from her cheek. "But you don't have to face it alone. You have me now. Always."

Eira let out a shaky breath, her voice softened. "I just don't understand, Callian. He destroyed everything for her—my mom. And now, seeing him like that, lost and confused… part of me wants to understand him. But I can't. He never looked for me, never cared."

"Maybe he's not worth understanding," Callian said quietly. "Maybe it's just about finding your own closure. He's a horrible man too."

"But what about Vanessa?" Eira asked with a rising voice again. "He's raised her like she's the center of his world, and she doesn't even know I exist. How is that fair? He loved her, but he didn't even try with me. He destroyed my mother's life, and for what? To raise someone else's perfect little girl?"

Callian sighed. "Life is rarely fair, Eira."

"I keep thinking about my mom," Eira continued speaking even with her breaking voice. "How she struggled, how she cried every night. How she begged him to stay… he broke her. And now… now I'm the one who has to face him."

"Eira," Callian murmured, pulling her closer again, "you don't owe him anything. Not your understanding, not your sympathy. You can hate him. You're allowed to feel that way."

"I just… I wish it didn't hurt this much," she admitted quietly. "I wish I could just hate him without feeling all this… this mess inside."

Callian held her tighter, yet gentle. "You're stronger than you think. Whatever you decide to do, I'm here. If you want to confront him, we'll confront him. If you want to leave, we'll leave. It's your choice, Eira. No one else's."

She nodded slowly, her head rested against his chest as her tears began to slow. "I don't know what I'm going to do yet. But I know I can't just walk away. Not after all this."

Callian pressed a kiss to her hair. "Then we'll stay. But we do it on your terms. No one else's."

Eira closed her eyes, her breathing gradually calmed down as Callian's warmth surrounded her. 

For the first time in hours, she felt a small sliver of peace. 

But deep inside, she knew that this was only the beginning. 

The confrontation with her father had cracked something open inside her, something she wasn't sure she could fully contain.

As the car drove through the dark streets, Eira remained curled against Callian. 

The road ahead was uncertain, and her feelings were tangled, but one thing was clear: she wasn't done with Henry Blackwood.

Not until his power and reputation were over.

She looked at her hands, and then at Callian's hands. They were so warm. 

It almost felt so real to her, like they were in a real relationship.

"Callian…?" she muttered.

"Yes, Eira?"

"I'm sorry for spending so much money…"

A small chuckle escaped his lips. "What money, darling? What are you talking about?"

"Th-the painting," she was playing with her fingers. "I'm sorry for spending seventy million—"

Callian cut her off. "This? You're worried about this little money? Eira, you really surprise me every day."

"What is that supposed to mean?" Eira raised an eyebrow.

"This is my coffee money. I will make it double tomorrow in like two hours, so you have nothing to worry about." Callian tapped on her head. "You know you're short…?"

"…"

"Now that I think of it, are you sure you're Henry's daughter?"

Eira glared at him. "My mom would never cheat. Of course, I am!"

"No-no! It's not that… it's just…" Callian paused, inhaled more air, and spoke again. "You're so beautiful, and Vanessa is just so ugly. She looks exactly like him, while you—"

"I look like my mom, not my dad."