Ch 27 Lover's Goodbye

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The morning of the day Severus would leave for his apprenticeship found a smile on Lily's face as she was about to leave on her date with him, when she heard a knock at the door. Curious, she peered through the peephole and saw the sallow face and stringy hair of her newfound boyfriend. "Looks like someone's here early," said Lily to herself, her smile widening. "Hope he's going to like what he sees."

Lily had taken her time getting ready that morning, trying to look her best for today, wearing a yellow Muggle sundress, with a pair of nice, open-toed sandals on her feet. She had even taken the time to make herself up, trying to 'bring out those beautiful eyes', as her mother would say. She was unsure how well it had worked though.

Opening the door, Lily said with a smirk, "Hey Sev. Didn't we agree that we were meeting at your house?" The reason for her smirk was because, in addition to being glad to see him, she had purposely posed in such a way as to properly emphasize her dress and how it looked on her. A 'check me out' pose, as Sabrina might say, complete with leaning forward just a bit and clasping her hands together behind her back.

The effect was immediate. When Severus saw her, his eyes widened just a fraction, swiftly glancing up and down her body. They lingered momentarily on her bust before returning to her face. A second later, as if suddenly realizing she had asked him a question, he said, "Yes we did...I came early because...weren't we supposed to be..."

"...wearing our wizarding clothes like I said we would?" finished Lily, flushing red, although still smirking at his looking her over. Yeah, he definitely thought she was hot. "Honestly, I forgot. I was so focused on making sure I looked my best that I forgot where we'd be traveling to."

Severus' lips quirked into a smirk of their own, and he said drily, "You still have not told me where we are going. If I did not know any better, I would say that you did such a good job keeping it a secret, you tricked yourself."

"And as such, it's a good thing you know better than to say such a thing," replied Lily with a chuckle. Now for Severus' surprise. "In any case, we are going on a date today, to Diagon Alley. I'll just have to get changed into something more wizardly first, then we'll go."

At the word 'date', Severus turned away. She thought she saw a tinge of pink on his face though. "Alright, I'll wait." He paused, then said quietly, still facing away, "You look really nice."

"Thanks, Sev. I'll be ready in a few minutes," replied Lily, giving him a quick peck on the cheek before climbing the stairs and making her way to her room.

This date was definitely starting well, decided Lily as she changed into her wizarding attire. Unfortunately, it was nothing more than plain black robes as wizards seemed to lack anything between 'plain black robes' and 'expensive dresses/dress-robes', so all her prior effort was mostly wasted. Still, that look he had given her when he had first seen her, his eyes raking her body...the effort had been worth it.

Descending the stairs soon enough, she saw Severus patiently waiting for her by the door.

"So, to Diagon Alley then?" asked Severus, his voice cracking ever so slightly.

Lily nodded, offering him a grin. "Certainly. I'm ready to go when you are. I don't know about you, but I'm looking forward to our date. I thought it would be the perfect way to wish you a good apprenticeship."

"Ah, thank you," came Severus' hesitant reply, sounding rather shy. "Let us go."

What Lily said was actually only half-true though. Although she was certainly looking forward to the date, she had actually planned on throwing him a goodbye party, until she realized just how few people would attend. The list would number herself, Mary, and possibly Evelyn. It was unlikely that any of his Slytherin 'friends' would respond to her invitation anyway, even if she sent one. As such, with so few for a party, that was out. A goodbye date was the next best option.

Holding hands, they apparated to Diagon Alley, arriving right inside the Leaky Cauldron. Lily wondered how she ever got by without apparition. It would have been hours to drive to London, but with a quick spell, they were there in seconds. It was just so convenient, it was incredible.

The Leaky Cauldron was decently crowded enough, the pub the same as it ever was in appearance, but Lily noticed a tension in the air. The people there were nervous and uneasy, and when she and Severus had arrived, everyone's eyes had fallen upon them, quickly surveying them before slowly returning to their drinks.

"So, what are we doing on this date, exactly?" asked Severus, frowning as his eyes flicked over the pub, apparently having noticed the same strange air she had.

Deciding to ignore the tension, Lily gave his hand a quick squeeze and said, "Well...I was thinking about grabbing something to eat, then stopping by a store or two, perhaps Flourish and Blott's. If there's something else you would rather do, that's fine. This is your day, Sev."

"That sounds fine," replied Severus slowly. "Is there anywhere you'd like to eat in particular?"

"Well, there is one place I was thinking of..."

Severus hadn't objected to her selection, and soon enough, they had finished eating a nice meal at Proscuitto's, an Italian restaurant run by a Muggleborn couple she had gone to once with her parents. It had went well enough, save for minor argument over Lily's paying the bill as part of the gift, but he had acquiesced in the end.

Lily hadn't said anything, not wanting to ruin their date, but she couldn't help but notice the same fear in the air that had been in the Leaky Cauldron. It was everywhere, in how young mothers wouldn't let go of their children's hands and old men gave wary looks at anyone who got a smidge too close. It struck her as ominous indeed. She was sure Severus noticed it too, but he didn't say anything either.

They continued their date though, and now they were walking into Flourish and Blott's, side by side with full stomachs for each of them.

"...so Severus, you're free to pick out any book you want, and I'll get it for you. It'll be a good luck gift. Besides, somehow I suspect you've read your whole library twice over already," said Lily, with a small grin. He had held her hand as they'd walked into the bookshop.

"Any book?" Asked Severus with a raise of his eyebrows.

"Any book," confirmed Lily, waving her hand at the various shelves. "As long as I can afford it, it's yours. No matter what is inside."

Severus gave her a suspicious look, but nodded all the same. "Very well. Meet up once we have decided on our purchases?"

"Sounds good!" And with that, they split up, Lily going to browse in the Charms section, while Severus vanished amongst a different set of bookshelves.

Over the next half-hour, Lily went through most of the new releases in the Charms section, before deciding on her purchase, a book on the theory behind the spellwork of Charms. It wasn't particularly practical, but it was fascinating.

It seemed that, much like with Potions, there was a lot more behind a well-cast Charm than a simple swish-and-flick. She wondered why they didn't go too much into it in the school, but supposed that that sort of advanced study and explanations would take away from teaching them how to perform the various spells. They could learn fifty spells adequately in the time it would take to master five. Quantity over quality.

Having made her decision, she went looking for Severus, figuring that he was probably about ready himself. Knowing his interests, even if she wasn't quite comfortable with them, she quickly made her way over to the corner which had the store's small selection of books on the Dark Arts.

However, to her surprise, he wasn't there. She'd thought that he would take advantage of the free gift to look up something on the Dark Arts, given his wanting to clarify that she was offering him 'any book'.

Apparently not though, although then again, the section on the actual Dark Arts was pretty small, so perhaps he'd gone into more of the Defense section.

But Severus wasn't there either. She wondered where he might have gone, given that he had carte blanche to get any book he could possibly desire. What could he want? If she were in his shoes, what would she get?

Then a dirty thought struck her, making her blush deeply. Like all bookshops, Flourish and Blott's surely had a...more adult section. Perhaps Severus had decided to get something from there? "No...surely he wouldn't."

She forced a giggle, trying to laugh it off. But then again, he was a teenage boy, with all that implied. She still remembered how eager they had been the first time they snogged. Perhaps he just wanted to look up something like that to help the two of them out in those sorts of matters? If so, perhaps it would be best to help him out, just in case.

Deciding to follow her instincts, Lily made her way over to a somewhat dimmer corner of the store, marked with a large hanging sign which said, in flowing letters: ONLY For Those Of Age.

It was rather quiet, with only a thin middle-aged man browsing the shelves with her. Again, Severus was nowhere to be found. Lily was about to leave the section when a thin, leather-bound book caught her eye. In light, silver tracing, it read: Beautiful Romance: A Witch's Illustrated Guide to Erotic and Lusty Matters by Emelia MacMillan.

Curious, Lily pulled it off the shelf, and started to read…

Making her way to the checkout a little later, Lily saw Severus slouching against the counter, waiting for her. To her surprise though, he wasn't alone. Mary was talking with him, a slight smile on her face as she jabbed her finger at a thick, black tome in her hand.

As she walked up to the two of them, she heard Severus say, "That is certainly an interesting concept, but the spell would be a bit...impractical in a duel, would it not? If you could successfully bring off such an easily countered-What took you so long, Lily?"

"I was looking for you," replied Lily defensively, hoping she wasn't blushing. "Where were you, anyway?"

Severus gave her a questioning look. "Given my newfound apprenticeship, I decided that it would be best if I looked up some of the theory behind potion creation. I imagine a skilled Potions Master would have to know quite a bit of that to do research, rather than being a glorified assembly line."

"And, like I said to him earlier," replied Mary, a small smile on her face as she leaned back against one of the shelves. "I am just above a Poor in Potions, so he's wasting his time discussing the matter with me to begin with. He'd probably be better off discussing something like that with you anyway, Lily. Then I started talking his ear off about dueling."

"Dueling?" asked Lily curiously. "Why dueling?"

Mary gave her a sidelong look, all mirth vanishing. "Because of what happened last night, of course. Haven't you read the Daily Prophet today? I thought you had a subscription."

Lily shook her head uneasily. "No, I was busy planning for what Severus and I would be doing today. Why? What happened?"

In low tones, Mary told the story. "A young Pureblood and his parents were found murdered last night. They had You-Know-Who's mark hanging in the air over their home. Apparently, they were considered to be too blatant of Blood Traitors, so the Death Eaters killed them. They were a very old family and he even worked under the Head of the Department of Mysteries, but they were killed anyway."

"I thought that the Death Eaters only went after Muggles and Muggleborns?" asked Lily, puzzled.

"Yeah, so did I. Apparently, they've added Blood Traitors to the list," said Mary, glancing at Severus. In a bitter voice, she continued, "It seems to have everybody spooked. I guess they thought that You-Know-Who and his Death Eaters wouldn't sink so low as to murder non-Muggleborns."

"They were wrong," replied Lily grimly, giving Severus a quick smile to show she didn't mean him as she continued, "The Death Eaters are willing to sink as they can and keep going even further down, if it's for their master."

"Indeed," said Severus quietly, looking away and staring fixedly at a display of lacy, decorative bookmarks. "They are his elite. The most respected, loyal, and powerful servants he possesses. Some are willing to kill Muggleborns for no reason at all, but all would kill for him if he ordered it, even if it was purebloods."

"No wonder everybody is afraid," said Lily.

There was a silence then, all three of them contemplating what the news meant. To Lily, it meant war. Up until then, there had been many murders, both of Muggles and Muggleborns, all commonly known to be done by servants of Voldemort. If he was willing to kill purebloods, even members of the ministry, then open war was surely on the horizon. The Ministry of Magic couldn't take that lying down.

It always came down to blood, it seemed. For all the talk of how Muggleborns were just as good as purebloods, the fact that Voldemort was willing to go so far as to target purebloods was what had everybody spooked.

"In the interests of changing the subject...Lily, there's something we need to discuss," said Mary, before turning to Severus and politely asking, "Severus, mind if I talk to Lily privately for a minute? I know the two of you are on a date, but it is important."

He narrowed his eyes, but remained polite as he said, "Very well. I hope it proves...fruitful." Nodding at the two of them, he strode off into the bookshelves.

The moment he vanished behind the shelves, Mary said, sounding a little guilty, "Sorry, this isn't a secret from Severus or anything. I just felt it would be more...tactful to discuss the Europe problem privately."

Lily nodded slowly. "You are probably right. He was really mad when he found out to begin with. Since then, I think he's basically been pretending he never heard me mention it."

"Probably for the best. What else could he do? Tell you you're an idiot ten times a day for letting it get this far?" said Mary, chuckling.

"Hey!"

Mary gave Lily a look as she said, "It is true, you know. You should have killed this in the planning stages long ago. Now it's a bloody mess."

"I know. It wasn't my best idea. I was busy with other things, but I should have taken care of it long ago," admitted Lily. "Now though, did you come up with a way to fix it? Or am I just here to get teased over it?"

"The first one. You said that the Potters are really opposed to the Dark Arts, right?" said Mary, her eyes twinkling in a way that she found oddly reminiscent of Dumbledore.

Lily couldn't help but laugh. "That is an understatement, but yes."

Mary grinned fiendishly. "What I was thinking was that James' dad probably wouldn't be too thrilled to have his son going out with someone interested in the Dark Arts, would he?"

Uneasily, as she thought she had an idea of where Mary was heading, Lily replied, "No. I don't imagine he would like the idea much at all."

Her grin widening, looking like the proverbial cat who got the cream, she said, "Okay, so here's what I did. Luckily, you already laid the work when the two of you met, so I just had to add a bit more. I sent him a letter, pretending to be one of those embarrassingly-in-love sots who have a huge crush on him... So basically, I pretended to be Sabrina."

Letting out a snort, Lily still said, "Now, to be fair, she's gotten a lot better since she started going out with Remus. I think she might actually like him more than James."

Mary raised her eyebrows. "Hard to believe. Still, she did sent me a letter recently. Apparently, the two of them are in Southeast Asia now. They plan to travel around there for their Summer, and come back in August."

"I hope things are going well for them. Remus really likes her, and he deserves to have something good to happen to him," said Lily, thinking about how he'd helped her and Severus.

"I agree," said Mary. "That said, my point was that, coming from an idiotic sot, James' father wouldn't investigate who it came from too much, but he'd wonder about you. Then, you'd just so happen to have a couple of Dark Arts books in your living room when he comes over, and goodbye Europe!" Wearing a satisfied smirk, Mary leaned back. "How do you like it?"

Frowning, Lily considered. Hesitantly, she said, "Well, I don't see any reason why it wouldn't work. James' father does seem the type it would work perfectly on..."

"I hear a 'but' coming," said Mary, her smirk fading.

"...But, doesn't it seem a bit dodgy?" asked Lily hesitantly.

"The alternatives to 'dodgy' are going with James to Europe, or probably forking over a thousand pounds," said Mary in a deadpan tone of voice. "Make your choice."

"You make an excellent point, but I just don't know..." said Lily with a grimace. "You're right, I was an idiot to let it get this far."

"Yes, you were."

Lily glared at her friend. "You don't have to agree with me, you know."

"Yes, I know," said Mary with a chuckle. "I just want to."

"Oh, shut up. We need to find Severus, anyway."

Mary shrugged. "Don't worry. He's probably got his nose pressed against a book as we speak. Speaking of which, he said that you were giving him one today, as a gift of some sort?"

Lily nodded. "Yeah, he's going to be leaving for his apprenticeship later today. I decided to pay for one as a goodbye present. His choice."

Balancing her head on her chin, Mary visibly considered. "Hmm, I should probably get him a gift from me, too. One friend to another."

Lily smiled to herself. She knew that Severus and Mary would end up good friends if they gave each other half a chance. Aloud, she said, "Get him anything you want, so long as its not a book. No copying my brilliant idea."

Mary laughed. It sounded a bit like a dog barking. "Do not fear. Your brilliant idea is safe from me. I'll send him something by letter in a couple of days, and let you get back to your date."

Lily grinned at the thought. "Thanks, Mary. Now, let's find Sev."

Finding Severus turned out to be pretty easy. They spotted him sitting at the floor of the Potions section of the store, reading his heart out. Mary bid her farewell, leaving Severus and Lily to themselves.

As they made their way to the checkout, Severus asked in a guarded voice, "So, what did Mary want to talk to you about?"

Lily considered what to say, before finally saying, "She wanted to talk to me about a way to get me out if the whole blasted trip to Europe with James."

"That's good," said Severus cautiously. "Why didn't she want me to hear?"

Lily shrugged. They were second in line at the checkout by now. "I think she thought it would be more tactful, given that we're on a date, if she brought it up privately. I mean, you have been avoiding the subject."

"That is a...valid point," said Severus slowly. "I suppose I figured that there was little I could do, so I might as well ignore it."

Lily considered. "Well, there is one thing you can do to help. You see, I need Dark Arts books..."

As they checked out their books, Lily paying for Severus' as promised, she filled him in on the plan. He had liked it, saying that one good manipulation deserved another. He promised to help her with the books she would need for her plan.

Speaking of books, although she had been sorely tempted by some of the...interesting books in the Adult section, Lily had only gotten the Charms book, as her family may have been more well off than Severus', but her allowance still wasn't that much. The date today was just about all she could afford for a while.

As such, they finished quickly. One more apparition later, and the two of them were inside the living room of Severus' home. They had actually arrived a few minutes before Evelyn was due to pick him up. They were alone.

The home had been cleaned up since the last time she was here. Everything looked, if not perfectly clean, at least not filthy, and any garbage had been picked up. It was still poor in appearance, with cheap, threadbare furniture. Evidently, Severus had been busy.

Speaking of whom, Severus had an awkward nervousness in his posture as walked across the room and sat down in a threadbare armchair. "So, I guess this is almost it."

"Yeah, only a few minutes before you leave," agreed Lily quietly, glancing around the room as she spoke. With all the trash emptied out, it felt...sad, sad and lonely. "How do you feel?"

Severus leaned back, looking around the room but never quite at her. "Mostly nervous, I suppose. It's just the two of us, alone."

Lily chuckled, giving him a flirtatious little wink. "So, being alone with me makes you nervous. Well, I'd say I don't bite, but you already know that would be a lie."

Severus' face went a little pink. "Ah, that isn't exactly what I'm referring to." He paused. "Nor is it something I mind terribly."

"Oh?" asked Lily, leaning over Severus and whispering in his ear. "Then what do you mind?"

Severus closed his eyes, seeming to force the words out as he said, "I…I'm worried that I can't be trusted alone with you, not after what happened last time. I...I nearly..."

Frowning, Lily looked at him quizzically. "Nearly what, Sev?"

"I nearly hit you, when you first told me about Potter's little scheme," admitted Severus quietly. "I am dangerous to you, and I can't trust myself alone with you. What if it happens again?"

"So do you think we should never be alone again?" came Lily's heated response.

"I...possibly. I don't know. It...it might be for the best," said Severus hesitantly.

"And don't I get a say in this, too?" Lily was unable to keep the anger from her voice.

Severus gave her a surprised, confused look. "Yes, of course you do, Lily. But why would you want to be alone with someone who might hurt you at any moment, with spell or fist?"

Lily rolled her eyes. "Yes, Severus. I'm clearly in immense danger, given that we've been friends since we were kids and you have hit me all of...oh, never! Even if you were the terrible threat you think you are, I'm a pretty skilled witch. It's not like I couldn't get away if something happened. Besides..." She took his hand in hers, clasping it tight and warm. "...I believe that you're better than that. You're not your father."

Severus looked down, seeming to marvel at the sight of her holding his hand. "Promise me you will, Lily."

Lily frowned, confused. "Promise what, Severus?"

Severus took a deep breath, then, letting it out, he said slowly, "Promise me that if I ever do hurt you like that, that you won't stand for it, that you'll stop me, and make it so I can never hurt you again, by any means necessary."

Lily raised her eyebrows, giving him a quizzical look. That was awfully...detailed. Then she realized: he had surely seen his father hurt his mother many a time. At least a few times, she must have considered leaving, but never left. "Alright. I promise. If you ever hurt me like that, I will do exactly as you just said."

Severus let out a sigh, sounding relieved. "Thank you, Lily."

Giving him a quick peck on the cheek, Lily embraced him gently. "You're welcome, Sev."

She was rewarded for her efforts with an embarrassed Severus, who in her opinion looked quite kissable when he was all flush-faced like this, peering up at her like she was some beautiful angel for him alone. So, she bent over, lips puckered...

...when there was a sudden crack from outside, immediately followed by a trio of knocks at the door. "Hey, Severus!"

"That's probably Evelyn... I guess you'd better get the door, Sev." Lily let out a sigh. She might tolerate the girl, but that did not mean she liked her.

He nodded, letting her inside.

"So, Severus," said Evelyn as she strode inside, Katrina following. "Do you have everything packed and ready?"

Lily rolled her eyes. Why did Evelyn have to be cheerful today of all days?

"Yes," said Severus with a slow nod. "I am almost ready."

"Alright, that's good. Since this is your first time to our home, we're going to have you side-along Apparate with Katrina. It's pretty far, and will take us multiple stops, so grab what you can yourself. I'll take the rest," said Evelyn, sounding positively chipper. "Now, we're a little late today, so I'd like to leave quickly. Did the two of you already finish your goodbyes?"

Severus and Lily looked briefly at one another, then shook their heads.

Evelyn shrugged, before saying, "Okay, Katrina and I will go grab what stuff of yours that I can then. Where did you put it, Severus?"

"In my room," replied Severus. "It's upstairs, the last door on the left."

Evelyn smirked. "Alright, I'll give you two five minutes to yourselves. Make the most of them, alright?" She waggled her eyebrows suggestively

"Yes, your highness," muttered Lily sullenly.

At Severus' nod, the pair of them strode upstairs, leaving Severus and Lily to themselves.

"So..." said Lily, unsure of where to begin. "...I suppose this is a second summer in a row where we won't see much of each other."

"Indeed," replied Severus quietly. He watched her in silence.

Lily swallowed a lump in her throat. "You know, I'm really going to miss you, Severus. It might be weeks before we get to see each other again. Just...promise me that you'll write to me, okay?"

"Of course I will," said Severus. "Will you write me, too?"

"Of course...I will." Lily felt like crying, but she forced herself to smile as she said, "You're going to do an amazing job as an apprentice, Severus. I'm sure. Just make sure to take some time to enjoy yourself too, okay?"

"I am sure that there will be moments, every so often, where I feel a sense of enjoyment," said Severus, faintly deadpan. In a more serious tone of voice, he looked in her eyes and said, "Take care of yourself, Lily. Especially around Potter. I wouldn't put much past him."

Lily nodded. "I will." With that, she pulled him close to her, embracing his body and nuzzling against his chest. "I...I shouldn't be making a big deal about this. It won't be too long until we see each other again, right?"

"Yes," admitted Severus reluctantly. "I'm sure we'll see each other again soon. It just feels longer than it is."

Drawing him close, she kissed him gently, in a way she hadn't really felt him kiss her before. This kiss was gentle and soft, tinged with meaning. It made her want to cry.

Lily held it until she heard Evelyn saying sardonically, "Not to be heartless, but Severus, we really need to be off. I've got all your stuff here, so let's get moving."

Breaking off the kiss, Severus nodded slowly. "Alright, I'm ready." Peering at Lily, he said, "I'm not sure if I'll be able to apparate here myself until I get a better hang of it, but I will see you again soon, I promise."

Forcing a grin, Lily said, "I'll make sure you keep it."

Severus smiled ever so slightly, and with one final goodbye, he, Katrina, and Evelyn were gone, leaving Lily behind, standing alone in that sad, threadbare living room.

It was another half-hour before she walked home. In spite of her robes, the night seemed cold indeed.