The Killer and The Priest

I stepped into the church, my eyes were directed at the floor that was slightly illuminated by several candles that stood in each corner of the chapel. The priest Olek casually strolled past seats, but stopped at the statue of the deity they were praying to. Upon closer inspection, I noticed that she had a sun symbol engraved in her chest, finishing off the religious symbols that happened to be the sun and the crescent. However, the most noticeable detail, being her hourglass, was not present in the church at all, not at the priest or even at the two spires outside.

"The hourglass sure is a weird symbol to have with her." I whispered to which the priest hummed, "You think so? I would say this is the most fitting symbol for someone who symbolises the end."

The priest turned to me, his eyes were blinking slowly, yet the smile soothed my soul, although not too much considering what I was about to tell him. He was obviously waiting for explanations to why I came this late in the evening, but all I could do was standing still as if masking my presence. A few minutes of awkward silence later, the priest patted me on the shoulder and waved for me to follow him to the confessional that stood in the corner, the opposite way from the door to his room.

"I believe something significant weighs down your soul, Blake?"

I nodded slowly without raising my eyes at him, to which the priest hummed once again, but then kept silent. After he entered the left door of the confessional, I stepped into the right one. I made myself comfortable on the bench and faced the wooden mesh window. I did not see the priest before my eyes, but could hear his breathing along with a faint smell of alcohol coming from him. The notion of the priest indulging in drinking made me chuckle a little, however, I stopped immediately as he said with his soft voice, "You may speak now."

I hesitated for a moment, but then asked one question for reassurance, "Will you not tell anyone about what I will say?"

The rustle of his clothes could be heard behind the window as the priest explained, "Sins are confessed to move on. If I told anyone about others' secrets, I would be unfit as a priest."

"Even in the context of unsolved crimes?"

"If you are ready to confess then it should not matter. This is the first step to your repentance, Blake." he said confidently, making my brow twitch as I pressed, "Olek, this is not a matter of petty crimes! I committed something worse. Way worse."

No words longer escaped the window, as I leaned on the wall, contemplating my reasons to be here in the first place. I bore commitment as I stepped into the church, I wanted to get this off of my shoulders, and I figured that the best person to tell about my story would be the priest. They shall not break the seal of confession, no matter how heavy the crime of the sinner. I was taught this rule all the way back at orphanage, this way adults wanted us to teach the importance of trust, or whatever. This was the only time when I could feel at ease and talk freely about my various misdeeds, no matter what I did, I was always forgiven. All simple as that, however, this time the seriousness of my crimes surely could not let me off the hook this easily. And the more I bethought about the burning houses and bloodshed I committed, the more doubts pressed onto my mind. In the end, I slaughtered the relative of someone from this village, the very person Olek must have met on a daily basis. If I was in his place, I would not hesitate to express the wish for retribution.

Meanwhile, Olek did not rush me, he simply waited in silence, humming from time to time. But as seconds of hush turned into minutes, he finally relieved the atmosphere by saying, "Blake, I understand how hard it is to confess. I myself used to be not too obedient and often found myself in sticky situations. I could not confess about it no matter how nice the priest was with such a foolish child, but in the end, after I did it once, I felt at ease for the first time in my life. But if you are not ready, Blake, this is also fine, you are not obligated to speak about your misdeeds. But so you know, no matter how awful they are, I will refrain from hate and give you guidance."

I huffed at his words and said, "You sure are full of yourself.", to which the priest replied with an undertone of giggle, "If I lacked confidence in my own words, I would be unfit as a priest as well."

His words finally melted my throat and I confessed the greatest sin I committed with just one sentence, "My name is not Blake, but Dusk."

No sound came from the other side of the confessional, each passing second felt like a hammer crushing by back as I felt the stinging pain in my abdomen. I did it, I said my main here and now.

"So, you are telling me that you are the infamous Dusk who burned down several houses nearby?"

"That is correct, I am Dusk. Dusk the snatcher is what I have been called all my life. All I could ever do is steal, whether it be personal belongings or someone else's future. I killed, Olek, killed the father before his daughter's eyes. I killed several more people and stripped those who were lucky to escape from their houses. That's who I am, that's who Dusk the snatcher is."

Once again, zero comments followed after my monologue. I somehow felt relieved, but at the same time frustrated. I certainly told more than necessary this time, there was no way for me to play it out as a joke, thus I was left with only two options. I could either accept my fate or run away.

Before I was able to choose, however, Olek finally spoke, "Then it is really you, Dusk the snatcher, huh? May I ask you a question, Dusk?"

My silence became an allowance, thus the priest continued, "Do you regret your actions?"

"I do not know, I do not believe I did necessarily the bad thing. In the end, it was all for the greater cause."

"Greater cause?" 

The priest's voice was somehow resilient, perhaps, he had some hope for my actions to bear reason. Alas, this reason was understandable to no one, but myself.

"I wanted to strip those of power from their riches. This region functions on the idea of fair trade, so how come some people are in possession of vast territory, while others such as you had to break their backs in the field? This bullshit should not be possible in this system!"

"Oh, you poor soul…" sighed Olek, but then continued in his gentle tone, "I get it, you have never been to the Schöltum region before? This place functions on the fair trade, but some are able to obtain more valuable resources, which gives them more benefits. Moreover, people of this village are not forced to work in the fields, this is something we all choose to do. Something we love, Dusk."

"How can someone enjoy being looked down upon?"

The priest remained silent for a moment once more, but his speech quickly regained its momentum, "You truly are a child that got lost in the path of hardships. Dusk, you must be thinking about how much I hate you right now, right? But I am not, your sins truly run deep, I believe it would be the best for you to apologise for it and pray for those whose life you took, however-"

"-What do you goddamn know!?" I interrupted him while standing up, "If I tell anyone else about this shit, I am done for! The villagers will peel my skin off and hang me like a swine for the shit I have done. And why the hell should I pray!? They are dead, killed, they met their demise. My prayers would not put their souls to rest, I certainly would not accept prayers from the one who killed me!"

"Dusk." murmured the priest, seizing my fit of rage for a moment, "Even if they do not accept your prayers, you should still pray. The day will definitely come when your repentance shall be accepted. People are prone to forgiving, and goddess is kind to those who try. No matter what you do, please, do not let these crimes rot your soul."

I stood still while the priest gave me his final words. Once he was done, I huffed and narrowed my brows, "You know jackshit about people!"

What a joke indeed! For someone to forgive the likes of me? It would never happen no matter how hard I rub my knees against the floor while bowing to the goddess whom I should slay per Solitaire's request. I knew perfectly the callousness and self-centred nature of people, no one was this kind to forgive me… absolutely no one!

As I bolted past the first row of seats, I remained still observing the statue of the goddess along with an unexpected visitor during this late hour. I narrowed my brows once our eyes met, his smile was as nonchalant as ever and there was no change in his expression from the moment he abandoned me back in the forest. Solitaire did not say anything to me, instead he turned away to face the goddess once more, before dissipating into thin air, as if he never came to this place.

As I opened the door that led to the outside, I heard Olek speaking behind my back, "If no one believes you, then I will be the one, Dusk. We will meet tomorrow at the funeral of people… whose bodies you retrieved from the monster."

At his words, I slammed the door and strolled towards our hut in complete darkness. There was no need to remind me about the investigation we did with Nila. Not only did we not save anyone, but throughout the way, I have done absolutely nothing. No matter what I did, my efforts were futile regardless. In the end, stealing was the only thing I was fit for.

When I reached our hut where we would spend our last night with my elf companion, I stumbled at the doorway and nearly fell on the floor. I stomped my food and cursed loudly, before entering the room, where Nila was already half asleep. 

Judging by her darkened eyelids, I woke her up, but she did not complain. Instead, she only asked, "What happened?" To which I exclaimed, "Nothing!" and dived into my bed, refusing to explain things further.

As I was trying to beat my frustration by falling asleep, Nila hummed silently, "Is that so?" and rustled a little without producing any more sounds. She was fast asleep, however, I had to struggle more before finally partying with this godforsaken day via dream world.