Chapter 12: Fortune Favors the Bold

Summary: The power of fortune cookies know no bounds.

Quartz was once more in front of the thing that was not shaped like a Mirror. "Dear Mirror, sorry I didn't talk yesterday, it was a disaster." The talks were nice, they never talked to the thing that was not shaped like a Mirror before, they simply used it as tools and evidence of betrayal. Who 'they' were, eluded the thing within reflections that pounded for freedom.

"So it started with Tom, I like to think he was the domino effect, if only so I have someone to blame for everything." The mirror was sure it knew what that felt like. All it took was for someone else to exist to mess up your life. "He actually thought going to therapy would make him less angry. That was his first mistake." Quartz talked about therapy a lot. It sounded truly horrific.

"If he was just curbing the anger, then that's fine, but he assumed going to the Blood Moon Ball would link his soul to Star's forever. Talk about clingy." Souls, did those exist? They must have, for the thing that was not a mirror's soul was within the mirror's reflection. "So to try and talk about how he 'improved' and 'let bygones be bygones', he gave me two tickets."

Giving someone something of value? That sounded so weird. For some reason, there was this innate desire to just take whatever it wanted. "Those tickets led to my second problem. Marco's plan. He got worried that Tom was up to something, which in the end he was right about, but I'm pretty sure Star would've handled it. I probably would've just given him my ticket, but Kelly was in the room, and she latched on to the idea of me being her date because she and Tad broke up." 

Ah yes, the 'Tad' fellow. One that sounded to be bonded with someone in hate … it sounded pleasant. To be bonded with someone. "So she takes me as Marco hides in her hair. It starts off okay, people are a bit snobby, but then we get to the dance." Dancing? That was pretty intimate from the little it recalled.

"The dance…it was nice. Better than any of the dances I had at the silver bell ball. I just felt…closer to Kelly…and then something terrible happened…we…merged together? Fused together? I can't really describe the process, only that we were two people suddenly becoming one person." That sounded strange … and nice. "It was horrifying, and we showed our insecurities together until we lived a nightmare of self loathing." Still sounded like something compared to the void.

"So, my new goal is to let Kelly do what she wants and give her space. And when she comes back, avoid touching her … ever …" Why would he avoid touching someone he clearly liked? That was like putting yourself in a prison. Or maybe like them, the circle in the square. 

"Tad keeps texting me, but Star deleted the first forty messages and said to ignore the others. I think he's been sending me death threats." Rude, but fairly typical in its mind. "And I can't talk to mom and dad about it, otherwise I feel like I'll get the mewberty talk but ten times worse." The boy shivered. "Goodbye childhood." Strange concept, 'childhood'. Never would understand these creatures.

"Thanks for listening to me, Mirror." It…It wanted to call out to him, wanted to say something back so desperately. He talked to them like a person…like it was actually there, that their life had meaning…it….it…it needed to say something back!

"Thanks for listening to me, Mirror." 

"Huh…you said something back." Quartz looked at them weirdly. "Well Rhombulus did say you were a recorder." No, they weren't a recorder, they were a…a…why could it remember what it was!? "It's nice to have someone to talk to though, thanks for putting up with my venting." Please come back…please…please don't leave her alone again.

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"You guys eat so many weird things." Quartz spoke up. Marco could agree to some level, especially with how chinese food worked. "And how am I supposed to eat something without stabbing or scooping it?" They asked, working on trying to control their chopsticks.

"Wait, we're not supposed to be stabbing them?" Star asked as she raised a pile of food that was on one end of her sticks and shoving it in her mouth.

"I'm actually more impressed you managed that, these things are really fragile." Marco spoke, showing them both how to eat sushi and rice properly, as a master of karate would. "So is Kelly still not..you know..?" He had no idea what the girl would be going through after that fiasco at the Blood Moon."

"She texted me once saying she was okay, but hasn't responded to anything else." Quartz held his head down. "The first time I technically go on a date, and I violate her with my stupid magic. Even if I get into girls I'll never be able to touch someone without going too far …" Well that was a bummer.

"Hey, what did I say about talking stupid bro? It was an accident." Star threw a dumpling at her brother's head. "If she's still talking to you, there's obviously no hard feelings…except Tad, but no one cares about what he says."

"I do, he may be a bit rude but he's a nice guy when you get to know him." Sure Tad may have been a chill guy, but Marco wouldn't particularly care about his opinion.

"Hey, if you're really worried, why don't you try a gamble with a fortune cookie?" He joked. 

"Eh, I don't have much luck with food that tells the future." Quartz pushed him away. "On Mewni, there's these Calzones that tell you how you're going to die, but when I bit into mine, they just said inconclusive, you'll never really die."

"Oh lighten up, Quartz, those calzones are the reason why Dad goes to bed with a spear next to him, plus they have a great sense of humor." Star waved off.

Marco blinked. "Well that's somewhat disturbing … but yeah, fortune telling of any type here is a joke. People just rely on it seriously when they never really have any other options and are desperate."

"Oh really, let's see about that." Star grabbed her own, and opened it up. "Great things come to those that wish for it." The moment Star finished, something crashed through the window, and it was an entire bowl of fortune cookies. "I was wishing for more cookies! It came true!"

"How'd that even get here?" Marco looked out the window…and saw that creepy onion headed kid give a wave to them. With a nervous smile he waved back, hoping the kid would walk away.

"Marco, you were wrong! Your fortune cookies are magical tellers of the divine future!" Star was already getting way too invested, and he needed to quell the enthusiasm before she took it to an eleven.

"Star, that was a coincidence, that creepy kid outside could've just as easily thrown a brick or fireworks through the window." Glancing outside, the kid in question was throwing a brick at another house window. "Here, let me prove it for a fact." He took a cookie himself and cracked it open. "Your greatest desire will come true." He waited for a second. "See, it's just vague sounding sentences people write on small pieces of paper so others can read into…" A buzz went off on his phone. "Who's this?"

JLT: Hey. Janna gave me your number. Grabbed your backpack by mistake. Meet me at school tomorrow by your locker? Jackie Lin Thomas.

"...Complete coincidence." He hid his phone from view, knowing the teasing would never cease if they saw it.

"Let me try one." Quartz opened up a cookie. "Good things rest on your doorstep." The boy stood up, walking to the door and opening it. "See Star, you can't rely on-"

"Yo Quartz!" The boy was jumped by Janna. "Haven't seen ya since the whole cocoon thing. What's today's topic of weirdness?"

"...Apparently pondering whether or not I should start a religion worshiping future telling food." Well, Marco was two for two on convincing them otherwise.

"How did you get my phone number anyway?" Marco asked.

"Oh yeah, here's your wallet back." Janna tossed him back his now empty wallet. "Oh, and your house keys. I already made my own copy. And don't bother changing the locks, you know I'll just take the keys again."

"… Just stay out of my room." He grumbled. One barrier was down, he would genuinely karate chop her if the final one was.

"Eh, don't need to see any more poster's of men fighting in pajamas." The girl rolled her eyes before turning back to Quartz. "So turn into any other gigantic and presumably horrifying creatures?"

"There was that thing with the cat heads growing all over my body." Quartz offhandedly mentioned while rubbing his arm.

"Sounds disturbing and adorable. Let me fix some coca." He didn't want to know how she knew they had some. "So what's this about religion?"

"I have decided!" Star shouted out. "For now on, every decision I make shall be decided by fortune cookies!"

"Ahh…that's understandable. When I was ten, I believed a magic eight ball could make all my decisions for me." Janna reached for the pantry. "Then Amethyst threw it through a window and said balls were made for breaking and entering."

"Wait, someone is named Amethyst?" Quartz asked. "I thought I was the only guy named after a rock."

"Oh no, she and her friends are named after some kind of crystal from what I remember, but she never talks about them, gets her in a mood when I bring it up." What a strange life they lived.

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Ludo growled at his minions. "How are you all so incompetent that even after all this time, only LOBSTER CLAW managed to grab the wand!?" The imbecile that screwed up majorly twice. "They were even short that green bush haired girl, and we still lost!"

"Ah, we were still losing even when it was just two of them…" Giraffe Neck started to go on.

"Don't remind me!" He threw a pillow at the moron. "Time and time again, we've had situations where we had the advantage! The incident at Quest Buy, the time on that bus, the wrestling incident, even when that brat Quartz Butterfly turned against his own sister for a second! No matter what happens though, we still lose!"

"We just keep getting beat up, we can't fight magic." Two Face complained.

"That still does nothing for a weak human you can cut apart, and he's unarmed!" He was slowly losing it. "You know what we need, someone new!" Yes, more muscle power. "Start the hiring process!"

"Already done." He turned to … not one of his minions. "Sent across everywhere for anyone ruthless enough to join. And I fixed your meal as well."

"What the…?" Instead of the pile of berries mixed with mud that he was used to on his desk, there was a fresh plate of Pig-Goat meat with the finest looking swamp water he's ever laid his eyes on. "Where did you come from?"

"I let myself in." The lizard man gestured to the door.

"When?"

"When you hired me."

"I hired you?"

"I accept. My name is Toffee, a pleasure to be working with you."

"...I have no idea why I feel so embarrassed and impressed at the same time." Ludo could admit from time to time he wasn't too smart, mainly a side effect from hanging around so many idiots all the time, but he didn't want to play the fool to anyone else again. "If you're this good then you've gotta have a plan right?"

"Depends, which one of your minions is watching Star on the cameras?" The fact he already knew what the main goal was both made him scared of and be in awe of the monster before him.

"Me." Buff Frog raised his hand, though he said it with a bit of hesitation. "I've spied on Butterfly Princess all day. She's become obsessed with little writing on paper inside cookies."

"Fortune cookies, a tradition, but an abusable one." The man nodded. "How about we mess with her fortunes and deliver some bad advice?"

"Yes … yes!" He laughed. Mind games, of course! What better way to get back at that brat than to screw with her head. "Come on people, let's bake some cookies!" He paused for a second after saying that. "You know, there's just some things you can't make sound threatening no matter the context."

"You mean like the name Toffee?" Buff Frog asked.

"Oh, like Buff Frog is any better, Yvgeny Bulgolyubov." Toffee said some random name that made his minion's eyes widen in fear. "You'll find that there's very little that I don't know about."

"Sir Ludo, are you certain about this?" Buff Frog whispered.

"He's only worked for me for five seconds and he's already come up with a better plan than any of you have in ten years." Ludo countered. "Now heat the oven and get some flour!"

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Star walked with her new basket of cookies. "This is the best! Each fortune I read helps me through the day, even during school!" And so much good in the future to come.

"I don't know what's more uncanny, her belief or the world working to it." Jana commented. "What were the chances that it gave her the right answer for math?"

"It told her to take life as easy as pie, and she put that down on the test." Marco rolled his eyes. "Seriously, Star, at some point you're going to have to stop relying on the cookies. Even if they are true, you're just going to run out eventually."

"Heck no, I'm royalty, I'll always buy more." She smiled. "Come on Quartz, take another. Maybe it'll help you and Kelly get over the awkward stage."

"Kelly?" Jana said with a wry grin, elbowing Quartz in the stomach lightly. "Already chasing after other girls? And here I thought we had something special."

"Please don't joke about this, I'm still worried that she might hate me after everything." Quartz rolled his eyes.

"Let me guess, you pulled a Marco?"

"Why am I an adjective in this situation?" The boy in question asked in offense.

"Because you've been the prime example of 'boy with girl issues' since the first grade." Jana explained, before putting an arm around her brother. "You feel awkward, you feel like every step you make is a mistake, and you plan on keeping yourself at a distance for as long as you can, right?"

"Wow, that is Marco whenever someone mentions Jackie." Star realized. "The only thing Quartz is missing is the nervous sweat at the mention of Kelly's name."

"Alright, laugh it up." Marco grumbled. "Anything to steer the conversation in a different direction?"

"Lets try a fortune." Star smirked, opening up her cookie. "Sometimes letting your enemies win the battle can lead to a greater win in a war." She tilted her head at that. "Really? I never thought of it like that."

"Huh, that one actually sounded like real advice." Marco commented, before a portal opened right in front of them, Ludo and his band of monsters following him as usual.

"Star Butterfly." Ludo smirked. "Give us the wand."

"Sure." It was the will of the cookie, and she was its servant, after all.

"STAR!" Quartz shook her before she could hand off the wand. "Don't just give him the wand, that's like, you're one job!"

"Fine, fine, I'll try another." She opened another cookie. "Hurting an enemy may end up hurting yourself." She nodded. "Got it, don't hurt them at all."

"You're really making me feel conflicted about all of my pacifism right now!" Quartz formed one of his barriers, but she brought his hands down.

"Quartz, I realized I may or may not have been too eager about fighting, but if the cookie says it wrong to hurt them, then we must all listen to it."

"Sure, years of me saying it do nothing, but a cookie says it and she's all for it." Quartz muttered rudely. She looked over, noticing Lion was … actually running straight at the enemy? "Lion, you're here to help-" Lion stopped in front of Ludo, who looked terrified as the feline sniffed him, before running off at full force.

"... Did you really expect anything else?" Marco asked, punching the giraffe guy. "I mean, has he ever contributed to a fight at all?"

"Huh, he has been more flighty ever since coming to earth." Quartz mumbled and grabbed Jana by the arm, getting her out of the way of a club swing from the three eyed monster. "Sorry, sorry, really didn't think there be a fight today, which was dumb of me to think now that I say it out loud."

"No sweat, you'd be surprised how many times I'm in this situation with Amethyst." The girl looked like she was having a blast, grabbing a pipe and whacking Buff Frog upside the head. "First time we met, she saved me from getting eaten by a giant glow worm. It's kind of my thing to get involved with this stuff by now."

"Guys, you're just making things worse." Star sat on a dumpster as her friends only dug deeper holes for themselves. "I'll see if the cookies have any more answers!"

"Star, forget about the cookies!" Quartz shouted at her, tossing the chicken head into the wall. "You were better off making your own decisions whenever you wanted."

"People make their own destiny, it's how we grow and improve our lives and enjoy the moment!" Marco shouted. "Don't let someone else tell you how to have fun like your mom does!" Wait, was that what she was doing this entire time?

"Yeah, it's like knowing what presents you're going to have for your birthday!" Jana used her pipe to swat the fly guy away. "If you're told about it beforehand, the excitement gets completely sucked away."

Star looked at the cookies, then at her wand, before sighing and putting down the basket. "Fine then … let's have some fun." She smirked, raising her wand. "Warnicorn Stampede!"

"Nice!" Quartz shouted, before his eyes widened. "Wait, that's a pretty big spell for an alley-!" She didn't let her brother as the warnicorns trampled over everyone. "...Eh, I'll take it over her doing nothing anyday." Quartz said as he carried Marco and Jana over to the dumpster she was on.

"So no more fortunes?" Marco asked her.

"Nah, I ran this course as far as it'll go. Doesn't mean I still won't enjoy the cookies." She picked out the last four and handed them to everyone. "On the count of three, we open and say them outloud, just for the fun of it."

"One.." Jana called out.

"Two.." Marco cracked it open just a little.

"Three!" They all took out the little messages on the inside.

"Love will forever alude you." Marco read his aloud.

"You attract the most uncanny of beings." Jana scanned her paper.

"A great evil approaches." Star said hers to the gang.

"What you seek may be under your nose." Quartz looked over at his own, before they all laughed. "How did you even take these seriously?"

"No clue, they sound so stupid now …" She looked around. "Where do you think Lion ran off to?"

"Probably to catch some fish or something … never really see him eat."

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Toffee began his walk to let himself stew on his success. He successfully made the plan for Ludo to take him in, giving him a new army to control as soon as these buffoons realized he was the superior being. And Star Butterfly … he could feel the phantom spot twitch at that name alone. The damn butterflies!

He could feel the chaotic nature of her magic, how wild, how unpredictable it was. Her entire bloodline practically reeked of the supernatural. Not to mention the supremacy their ancestors carried. Peace? An absolute joke. But he learned to be patient, he knows to play his part well.

A crystal here, a lie there, all of it would slowly add up, and the emotions worked even better than expected. "Grrrrrr." Ah yes, the transportation.

"So you're still around? A loyal lap dog till the end, I suppose." He looked at the wild feline of one of Mewni's most infamous 'heroes'. "I figured you'd find him sooner or later. It's a shame there's nothing you can possibly do about it now."

"Raaagggh!" The beast lunged at him, only for Toffee to kick it into the ground.

"Well I could just put you out of your misery … but no, the boy needs you. Transportation for himself to do as he pleases … which will be what I please." He looked at the small crater he made, the Lion growling from within. "I do wonder however, what secrets lie within that mane of yours."

"Grrrrrrrr…. " The beast growled.

"You may not be her, but there is some level of satisfaction in this." Toffee grinned into the eyes of the Lion. "I just want you to know, 'Rose Quartz', you were right in the end. It's us or them. Had you actually been able to make up your mind, you could've spared the Butterflies so much suffering…and your son too."

It once more tried to bite his leg off, and he let the Lion. Toffee knew the thing would disintegrate sooner or later after all … what was one leg he could grow back in the face of overwhelming victory?

He looked over the two keys to his victory. Two children, naive and foolish, unaware of the importance they carried. In the end, they would be the downfall of all his enemies, and they'd have no one to blame but their own families.