history

The room was obviously small, and the walls, ceiling, floor, window, and even the door were old.

Wallpaper from the wall had been ripped off due to the smell that had been stuck on it, but he still could smell a distinct damp and musty smelled from the room.

while the ceiling that was originally plain white had become yellow ish, and there's even some brown stain on the surface.

The window was a sliding medium-sized window but had been sealed by a metal bar. According to Han Yeonggi's memory, someone had tried to break in through this window. But it failed since, at that time, Han Yeonggi was staying up late reading comic secretly.

In the end, the window had been sealed, but a few weeks later, someone threw a stone and broke the window.

Han Yeonggi family are always struggling with their's finances. They can't afford to change the window, and the only option they have is to cover it with some transparent plastic.

'It's been a few years since then. They had forgotten about it,' Yeonggi thought.

He shifted his gaze towards the uniform beside him that had been hung.

'And that uniform...'

According to Han Yeonggi's memory, he had done an audition for survival show and successfully accepted.

The production team delivered the uniform just yesterday and messaged them to bring it along their luggage and changed theirs clothes when they arrived.

Han Yeonggi is an aspiring idol.

Since he a teenager, he had tried to audition for various companies and get accepted into a new agency.

The agency at that time had just started and currently searching for a trainee to train under them and produce a star. They had an audition, and coincidentally, at the same time, Han Yeonggi just had been rejected from his previous audition.

At the age of 17, he had become a trainee. He had trained under them for 4 years and had polished all his skills in dancing, singing, and rapping.

However, even after 4 years, he is still unable to debut. Now his agency had produced a B list actor that had played a role in a few famous films and drama.

They did try to debut an idol group, and Han Yeonggi had successfully been chosen into the debut team. Unfortunately, due to various reasons, the higher-ups disbanded the debut team.

As he had lost all hope, he left the agency in dejected and decided to live like a normal citizen. He thought he could never achieve his dream.

Until years later, his friend, who was also in the debut team who had left the agency with him, sent a message. Informing him about a survival show called 'Boys Dream' was opening for an audition.

A months ago since then, and just a week ago, they had received an email informing them that they had successfully been selected to join the show.

Both of them had auditioned as a duo. Therefore, the production team asked them to prepare a performance for a showcase for the first episode where they would get rank by the judges.

Tomorrow, he has a practice with Yang Minjun.

They still had 3 more weeks before the first shooting. Since the production team still had to organise some important documents for the foreigners that had been selected to enter the show.

'Does that mean i had to enter this show and become an idol?' Yeonggi thought, as his face darkened.

Throughout his life, he never dance nor sing in front of people. He does enjoy singing, but there's a clear difference between singing by himself versus singing in front of an audience.

He wanted to ask the system, but after several attempts calling out, it didn't appear.

"This is gonna be hard than I thought..."

Yeonggi decided to sit on top of the blanket that was now his bed. While exploring Han Yeonggi's memory,

At first, in the beginning, he almost had an identity crisis. But after organising his mind and calming himself. He was able to differentiate between his and Han Yeonggi memory.

However, since Han Yeonggi memory isn't him to begin with, he still has his own identity and memories. He still needs time to digest the memories.

After he briefly 'watch' all the memory that belonged to Han Yeonggi.

He could summarise that Han Yeonggi was a sly and unhappy person.

On the surface, he was friendly, happy, playful, and neutral.

But deep down, he was actually a person that only acted and cared if it benefits him, manipulating behind the scenes using any means to get what he wanted without directly intervening, and a liar.

But he never lied if there's clear proof. After all he a sly person. He never gets caught lying. Even if he did, he always tried to play it out, saying he was joking or blaming others.

He is not intiredly a bad person since he never cause any harm indirectly unless that person deserves it.

The other part of him being unhappy was because of his past.

His mother was a single mom. She had him when she was still in her early 20. She was pregnant without a husband, which alone cause a lot of scandalous rumour and a chance for other to ridicule them.

She didn't have a chance to continue her study since she needed to take care of her newborn baby while also working to pay their's bills.

His mother was a strict and serious person, and she always pressured him to study and get an excellent gred. He never got the chance to enjoy his childhood like other kids since he had to help her mom after school to fold the pizza box and go to tuition.

Because of his schedule, he was always busy and didn't get the chance to hang out with other kids. Which resulted in him being isolated from his peers.

It's limited his social skills and also the main reason he developed a quiet personality.

He also didn't get any allowance. His mom always prepared a lunch box for him, so he didn't receive any money for him to save any.

As a kid, he obviously wanted to buy all kinds of toys, but his mom always says that it is not worth spending money on.

Han Yeonggi was actually interested in being a pianist when he was a kid. But as usual, his mother says that he should focus his attention on his studies first.

The only time his mother warmed up to him was when he got an excellent gred.

which led him to hate her and started to distance himself from her. Thinking that she only wanted to control him and didn't genuinely love him.

Their's relationship worsened when his mother decided to adopt a 16 year's old boy. Name Han Seongho.

Now his older brother and the same man that was lying in the living room.

Although their's relationship was currently good, before his mother death he had a bad relationship with Seongho.

It's understandable from his pov, since they already poor enough and barely had food for themselves, having another mouth to feed is burdensome.

When Seongho got adopted, Yeonggi was still an immature 12 years old kid.

He didn't think far or even care to spare his time to think. For him, Seongho existence was a threat to him.

Seongho was a smart kid. He had everything that his mother expected from him. Having Seongho in their family means he gonna replace him as his mother son.

Even though he hates his mother, he still craves for her attention and love.

Seongho did try his best to win over Yeonggi. Unfortunately, the wall that he built around him was as hard as an iron.

When he was 14, his mother died.

The reason for death was exhausted from working.

She works more than 4 jobs. Every single day with only 3-4 hours of rest. With only leftover food and also an expired instant lunch box from the convenience store she works at to fill her hunger.

It was a miracle that she managed to survive for a decade living in that condition. Her determined to work and create a warm house for her sons, pushing away all the negative thoughts on her mind.

Yeongje sight becomes blurry as he feels sympathy for Han Yeonggi mother, who is a hardworking woman who gets misunderstood by her only hope and love.

After her death, both Seongho and Yeonggi were still minor. As if she had already been prepared, she had already saved enough money for both of them to live until Seongho turned into an adult.

She also had requested help for the old lady next door to be their guardian, and the kind old lady accepted her request without wanting any payback.

Han Yeonggi knew this information from the old lady next door. When he ask the reason for her to be their guardian until Seongho turn adult.

Since the day she died, he was never the same.

He was depressed, feeling guilty, and regretful. Blaming himself for being immature, he hates himself for treating her badly.

At his darkest time, Seongho was beside him playing the role of an older brother. He tried his best to pull him away from negative thoughts.

He had done several attempts, but each of them failed as Seongho saved him every time.

He was inspired to be an idol when he saw an unknown boy group performing on the street with happy expression and dance in an energetic move.

It's a shame since it's been a long time, Han Yeonggi memory was blurry, resulting in Yeongje being unable to see the face of the 4 group man.